Subtle Influence

This would not do.

Xander was all for giving Buffy a choice but she wasn't choosing the right choice. He was right here waiting for her, ready and willing to love her in many various ways and she wasn't going for it. Perhaps he was being a little too subtle with his 'wishing'. Buffy could be a little clueless from time to time so maybe he just needed to come at this situation with all the subtlety of a baseball bat to the head.

10- A Slayer's one true love is easily identified by over sized hands and over sized feet. Buffy Summers is aware of how big Xander's hands and feet are. Buffy Summers knows Xander Harris is her one true predestined Slayer love.

That wrapped things up nice and neat and covered for his body modding screw up. Xander eyed the 'wish' for barely a minute and tried to think of a reason why it would fail. With this 'wish' there was no way he wasn't going to end up with Buffy. And as he couldn't think of a reason why it wouldn't work he hit enter.

Xander caught himself, stopping his head from face planting on the key pad. It didn't work. IT DID NOT WORK. How was this possible? He rewrites reality to make himself the only thing in the world that Buffy is destined to love and Buffy did not love him? Why? How? It was inconceivable!

Growling as he fixed his eyes on the computer in front of him Xander resolved himself to get to the bottom of this. And soon. He was not the most patient of men and fortunately for him he had a world altering computer program at his fingertips.

11- As the Slayer's one true love Xander Harris is aware of how Buffy Summers thinks and feels about him.

He was groaning before his finger left the enter key. Raising his hands into a face palm Xander repressed the urge to start cursing loudly. Of course Buffy was rejecting him. Of course she wasn't all over him. Buffy hate, hate, HATED how being The Slayer made her not a normal girl. Xander felt a little more guilty then he might have originally as he had been the one to make her grow a dick, thus making her more not girly than she had been. By making his 'true love' bound into her Slayer-ness he had made her not accepting him into an act of rebellion against her Slayer-ness. And boy did Buffy love to rebel. Many a time he had heard her gripe about the unfairness of being a Slayer and not an ordinary girl like she had been.

Xander raised an eyebrow as he suddenly now knew why Giles was giving him the stink eye. After suffering in horny silence for a while Buffy had gone to her Watcher and explained what was happening. And quick as a whip Giles had researched up 'one true loves' and began laying down the law about Buffy not being in a relationship. Apparently Slayer's who found their one true love tended to get a little wild. By Watcher reckoning. Which usually meant they put more into their relationship than they did into being the Slayer. Giles apparently had been giving Buffy warnings about one true loves and stories about former Slayers who had died as a result of being in a relationship. After more than a few testimonials about Slayer's going gaga for their one true love Buffy was worried that if she started a relationship with him that she would end up as nothing more then Xander's brainless fuck bunny.

Xander did have to grin as he was now aware of exactly how often Buffy had impure thought about him. Which was often. Pretty much as often as he had thoughts about her. Xander was actually surprised that Buffy was masturbating more then him, before school, during school, after school, before bed and apparently a wet dream or two. No wonder she was worried about becoming a mindless fuck bunny, Buffy was thinking about sex morning, noon and night.

Xander kind of felt like he owed Buffy an apology. And maybe one for Joyce too. The changes he had caused Buffy weren't just hard on Buffy. He really hadn't thought through what changing Buffy so much would do to her family. Suddenly sprouting a dick had thrown the Summers family into chaos. ...and they'd spent quite a lot of money going to doctors trying to figure out why and how Buffy had suddenly grown a dick. ...which probably hastened the divorce between Joyce and Hank.

Xander sighed, he'd have to remember to do something nice for Joyce later.

Taking a deep breath Xander tried to center himself and figure out how he was going to make things better. He could wait for Buffy to snap and jump his bones but that felt more then a little cruel. The longer she waited the more the idea that she was going to end up and brain dead fuck bunny worried Buffy. Giving in to her urges would probably be bad for Buffy. He could use the Master P.C. to not make her feel bad but... Xander would feel skeevy about screwing with Buffy's brain that much. ...Probably.

Now how was he going to fix her sex hang up without decreasing her sex drive, Xander certainly didn't want to change that. He liked the idea of a Buffy wanting him morning, noon and night. Xander made a mental reminder to pay Giles back for giving Buffy a complex about sex, something simple like impotence.