A Comedy of Errors

One of the things few people knew about the Daily Planet's greatest reporter was that Lois Lane woke like a cat. She was not one of those groggy folks that fight the last vestiges of sleep, or stumble half-conscious in search of coffee. Lois Lane woke up each day all at once, senses alert, instantly aware of her situation...she was on her back on some sort of thin matress, naked but with a sheet covering her from breasts down, leaving her head and shoulders bare.

And she had the wit not to let anyone else know she was awake and listening...

"What do you mean superpregnant? Who even programs that as an option?"

The voice was masculine, dominant, familiar. Lois kept her breathing steady as she recognized Lex Luthor's angry, tired tones.

"I'm sorry sir, as I said, there was an error in the process...the machine responds to feedback from the subject and her...uh...reaction to the stimulation was much greater than we had intended."

A female voice. Nerdy, submissive, a bit of a fearful quaver. Lois noted.

"Dectuplets," Lex roared. "Oversize and overweight. Three-year gestation. She was supposed to be out of here by the end of the night!"

A part of Lois thrilled to hear the words out loud, secret confirmation of the machine's announcements. She had half-convinced herself that it had been nothing but a dream...but it was real. Her thoughts drifted down to her tummy, to the clumps of cells busily dividing within.

"Well, I mean...there are...alternatives sir. The biolabs are always asking for more stem cells—" The nerdy voice ended with a ****.

"I am pro-choice," Lex said coldly. "Miss Lane has made her decision and I will respect Miss Lane's decision. I am not going to abort her brood simply for convenience' sake, or for raw materials. I am a scientist, not a monster."

There was a tip-tap-tapping of fingers on a keyboard.

"However, her timing is inconvenient. If Miss Lane wishes to be the most pregnant being in the universe, that is fine. We will help her accomplish that goal...according to my schedule."