...so unprofessional.

"Look out!!"

After tapping 'enter', Josh looked up from his phone to see the point of a paper plane.

Thunk.

"OW!"

A chorus of laughter was relegated to the background. On his shoulder was the hand of none other than Helen Jyssa, the hot secretary for his department's presiding manager. "Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm alright." Josh swiveled his head up to see her bubbly eyes honed back onto his. "Er, Helen." He gestured to his own collar.

"Oh," she said after taking a look down at her top, underneath her blazer. It was unbuttoned almost to her sternum. Instead of buttoning it, she positioned her hands under her tits, gave Josh a severe stare, and bounced them upward. "ZABOIIIING!"

As she gave them another bounce in front of his face, Josh was still registering what he just saw the typically steadfast, if busty, secretary do. "HELEN, WHAT THE HE--"

Meanwhile, the bob-haired brunette was splayed over his cubicle recovering from a mighty fit of laughter. Apparently at his reaction. It was at that moment that Ryker and Eddie chose to swoop in.

"Heeey, the Joshiee!" Ryker clapped him in the back as Eddie, mid-laughter, came over to Helen and pointed at her. Helen, trying to get up from Josh's desk, pointed back. They seemed to be in perfect synchronicity as they cracked themselves up over... cracking up. "Wanna join the circlejerk we're having in five minutes?"

"WHAT!?"

"What?" Ryker shot him a diffident look. "We would've went with the dance battle but George left his stereo at home." The slick haired, well built man leaned in. "Probably too busy fucking his wife's hot butt-cakes, that's why he can't remember shit."

Josh looked up at his senior co-worker with an unblinking look as a cry retook his attention.

"Pffaahaha, st--stoooop!" In front of him, another guy had crept up and jumped over Josh's cubicle to grope Helen's tits. He was now roughly slipping his hands underneath her top and trying to tear her bra off. "FUCK, Steven Wyle Jones, I'm going to--I'm going to tell your ex about this, pfffttthahahaha!" Before she could finish, resident hotshot Sally Heneskre rushed over to dump a pail of water over her face. And, in turn, all over his sleek Dell desktop.

"Gotcha back for yesterday, Helen," the twenty-four year old snickered, and raspberried. SMACK! "Ow! Pierre, that's like the fourth time you've smacked my butt, god."

"I'mma go for a fifth in a bit."

Sally placed her hand over her mouth, but instead of showing genuine revulsion, her face broke into a soft chuckle as she winked at the retreating project lead and jutted her tightly, if modest, skirted butt out even more.

Okay. That was NOT the uptight, highly wound Sally Heneskre he knew.

"What the hell, Sally?!"

"Sorry about the desk, Josh." The blonde came to his side and dropped her hand to his chest, rubbing it. "By the way, you hear about those China fucktards trying to strike a deal with us this morning? The nerve. Think just because we're local we're too stupid to understand---"

"WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?!" Josh stood to his feet, shrugging off Sally's hand. "Did you all watch Wolf of Wall Street last night for the first time?! We're the most profitable investment company on the street, have had only three internal mishaps in the past four months, and all of a sudden you guys are--are--"

...acting like animals.

Josh's thoughts flickered to the phone. The app.

The app.

The app!

"Having a circlejerk in five minutes, that's what." Ryker gave Josh another back-clap, and snapped his fingers, walking away. "Come on, get 'em slacks unzipped and join us. Heather's getting the facial."

Josh remained standing as Ryker's voice faded to the background and Eddie finger-banged the, now braless, Helen's pantyhosed clit. On his wet desk. In front of him.

SMACK!

"Oh, Pierre, my ass felt that one for sure, you shit. Also, you look really cute in blue. Wanna fuck?"

Cheers suddenly erupted in the middle of the room as three interns read a set of announcements while naked and balancing on one leg on one chair each. One of them was having honey poured on her balancing foot. Whatever that did.

Goodness' sake, if this was a dream... he'd never disclose any of this to his real co-workers even if the angels themselves had his head on the block.