Fate moves the story along unexpectedly

You pass some time in the backpack by playing chess in your head, which is quite hard to do when you keep forgetting where the pieces were and whose turn it was, then play an imaginary game of badminton but that wasn't nearly as much fun as you had thought it would be. Then suddenly your solo funtime is interrupted and you appear in the hand of the mage that had kidnapped by you.

"OMG, do we have to stop, we've got to clear these dungeons before we can get into the open world part of the game" complains the cleric.

"But here's a workbench and I want to see how to use it, I want my staff to look cool" replies the mage with determination.

"What? Are you joking? Even if you bothered you'd have to replace it shortly anyway, that's the shittest staff in the game. It only gives +1 to magic."

"I don't care, I want my staff to look cool so everyone will think I'm a badass."

"Really, REALLY, are you sure? Cos a level 1 wizard doesn't usually strike fear into anyone."

"Well I defeated this skeleton didn't I, I'm going to keep it as a memento of my first kill. When I'm level 100 I'll walk around town with it and people like you will underestimate me so that when a griefer messes with me they'll have their guard down and then ZAP they're dead. "

"I can't tell if you're joking or a moron, have you any idea how many monsters you have to kill and how long it takes to get to that level, you'll never do it, you just don't have the commitment. Anyway, it was a team kill, you just happened to weaken it. Look, do what you want I don't care, we're going to find more monsters to slay."

"We'll just have to see won't we" replies the mage with the hint of smugness in her voice.

"Whatever, nOOb" replies the cleric as he and the rogue wander off.

The mage mutters to herself cursing the cleric as she places you on the table along with the staff. You had never realised before how pathetically childish heroes were or that they were jerks to each other, you didn't know what a noob was but it didn't exactly sound like a compliment. On reflection It seemed you had to act like an asshole to fit in with heroes. Oh well, not your problem but something was... something was happening and you didn't like it. You were being handled and tried to squirm away as best a jawless skull could but whatever it was wasn't going to stop. You blank out for a second but suddenly you feel different.

You are moved around in the air and the mage bashes you off the workbench which doesn't hurt because you are still undead. "Coooooool, I knew you'd be awesome. OMG, look at your stats, wait until I show Dave01roCks and seeXXXygrrrl876, they're going to be so jealous." What the hell just happened? You check your stats to try to understand what this dumb mage is talking about.

Name : Skeletal Staff
Class : Minor undead/weapon
Level : 1
HP : 1/10
MP : 1/1
STR : 2
DEF : n/a
Strengths : when held grants the hero the following abilities resistance to piercing weapons, resistance to sorcery, resistance to acid, heat and cold, immune to poison and drowning
Weaknesses : None
Special abilities : when held the staff can cast Fear, command undead or summon undead

You have to admit that your new profession seems to better than just being a jawless skull but overall, the lack of limbs or ability to interact with the world independently is still causing you to be frustrated. The lack of sleep and having to listen to the hero's inane conversation has made you angry, which is surprising given that the undead shouldn't be able feel anything.

The only question was how to use that anger.