The Evening Continues

"So you played poker against Barney for this?" Ted said to Robin's tits. He hadn't made eye contact all evening.

"Yes," said Robin, "as I have told you five times in the past hour and will lose my crap if I have to tell you one more time, I bet Barney that if he beat me at poker I would serve the group drinks all night naked."

"What was his bet? Was he going to serve beer naked if he lost?" Ted sounded disbelieving, but both of them knew Barney would streak through Times Square a hot girl promised to flash him at the end.

"No, I was going to settle for money?"

"He must have bet thousands if you were willing to risk this?"

"Well..."

"What, more? How much?"

"A hundred."

"A hundred thousand? Oh my God!"

"No, a hundred dollars."

"Do you know nothing of risk and reward? Do you think that being a naked barmaid for seven hours is worth a hundred dollars? That's like fourteen dollars an hour and you don't get tips?"

"I know, I know, I just... really thought I would win... may dad taught me and I'm really good... I just didn't know he was better." Ted's patronising tone had not made this any easier and he was still staring at her boobs. She couldn't blame him, but still... he had seen them hundreds of times before when they were dating.

"Do you remember how he has a playbook of how to manipulate women into sleeping with him? After years of cultivation and study he has evidently become a master or reading and predicting people which is an ideal skill-set for poker players"

"Well yeah, but that's different, this was poker..."

"Do you remember when he tricked Marshall and Lilly into betting on a teppanyaki presentation over the course of five years and none of us had any idea until the last minute? You know he knows how to bluff?"

"I um... didn't think of that, but that was a long effort and Lilly-?"

"What about how we have been trying to work out for years what he does for a living and no matter we say or do he has never let slip a thing? Perhaps owing to having a crap-load of nerve and a hell of a poker face?"

"I think your reaching a bit..." Robin was starting to feel annoyed with Ted, but more subtly, ashamed of herself for not thinking this through and now having to flaunt her ass like a drunk American... ugh, what if someone thought she was a dirty, obnoxious American? She'd never live this down.

"Finally," said Ted, laughing slightly and finally looking into her eyes for the first time all night, "Did you forget that he got really into magic a few years ago and got very good at slight of hand card tricks?"

"Wait, what?" Robin felt the realisation hit her like a bucket of warm water (In Canada, it's more of a shock when things are warm) "Do you think he cheated?"

Ted didn't have time to answer, a voice from the other side of the bar called out, "Hey, Robin Scherbatsky! I ordered those beers twenty minutes ago? Why are you still talking to Ted? That's right folks, this is Robin Scherbatsky, local journalist and news presenter on TV at ten PM Monday to Thursday nights! But tonight is a Friday so she is our naked waitress instead!"

Robin gripped the bottles in her hand tightly and marched over to the booth.

"You cheated!" She half shouted, slamming the bottles on the table. The **** of the motion made her boobs jiggle right in front of Barney's face.

"I won fair and square, you brought this on yourself."

"You did some magician card trick and rigged the deck. I want a rematch!"

Barney smiled an arrogant smile.

"Okay, gorgeous, as you wish, we'll do it right now I will raise the stakes, if you win, you can put on your clothes and I will give you $2000. But if I win, you have to complete your shift here and then work again tomorrow night."

"Fine, but if I win, you give me $2000 and sing the Canadian national anthem for the whole bar."

"Deal." Barney, clapped his hands together, there was a puff of smoke, and suddenly he was holding a crisp deck of cards spread out in a fan. He was also wearing a pristine pair of white gloves.

"What how did you do that? and where did you get those gloves?"

"Chapter seven subsection fifteen of the bro code. 'If a bro cannot suit up any part of his body when necessary, then a bro does not deserve to suit up at all.'"

"I don't care, we are not using those, you've marked them or something. I want a real deck of cards."

"Are you sure? These ones have pictures of models wearing only Italian silk ties. This deck is one of a kind, only made in Serbia. I tried to win them at an auction but I was outbid by a wealthy hot noble chick from Croatia. I thought I had lost them forever but then I knew it was the will of the Bro Gods that I should have them when I saw that same woman in an art gallery in New York just one week later. "

"Barney, I don't have time for one of your stupid made up stories, shut up and find some real cards." Hissed Robin.

"Wait!" interrupted Ted, "I want to see where he goes with this."

"The lady Adrijana Teo, a wealthy and big boobed daughter of a proud European noble family was collecting decks of cards like these. I disguised myself as a bodyguard to get to her table at a restaurant, After no small effort and with much risk involved I pulled off the "Artists' Demise" play and scored so big she gave me the deck as a thank you.

True Story"

"You pulled off Artists' Demise?" said Marshall in awe "up top bro!" They highfived cleanly.

"No he did not pull off that play, that whole story was made up and we are definitely not using those, that's disgusting." Shouted Robin, just as Lilly came up to the table.

"Oh are you playing again? I hope you'll be naked more - I mean, um good luck!" Lilly blushed a little.

"Not yet, I don't trust Barney's cards." Robin pouted placing her hands on her hips. She hadn't covered up with her hands all night, it was part of the bet, plus she didn't want to give Barney the satisfaction of thinking she was uncomfortable.

"Whoa how did you get these?" Lilly exclaimed, "This is worth nineteen crap-loads, it's some of the most talked about non-canvas art work in the last hundred years. Last I heard they were bought at auction by a wealthy Heiress from the Teo family in Croatia."

Robin ignored the implications of what her friend was saying.

"I mean it," continued Lilly, "there's not a blemish on them, they're mint condition and perfect for a game. It would be an honour to deal for you with these cards, there the best cards you could get."

"Okay fine," Robin gave up protesting, "if you're dealing, I'll play."