queenfish

"Why white again?" I asked once we had finished styling our hair and dressing.

"Because you're about to pop your cherry." Frankie, also in white, explained.

"I'm doing what?" I shouted.

"It's your first time going to the club." Claire, in white as well, explained eyeing Frankie oddly.

"Oh, was that why I wore white last night?"

"Yup, all part of the tradition, darlin'." Bobbi's matching white heels clicked along the sidewalk up to the club. The neon sign buzzed in purples and blues 'QueenFish' and below the marquee rolled in rainbow colors announcing the headline performers of the evening.

Inside it looked like a typical bar with wood and brass fixtures and a row of booths, not something I expected of a gay bar, but then, I've never been to one. "I'll be honest, this isn't what I expected," I told Bobbi as we sat at the bar, making sure to keep my legs together so as not to expose myself in my skirt.

"Oh hun, this isn't even the best part. This is the lounge. Like if you're done dancing or want a drink. Speaking of." Bobbi leaned over the bar showing off his butt to everyone and anyone who wanted a look. "Furgy!"

"Bobbi, back again I see." A handsome man with a neatly trimmed goatee, probably in his thirties walked up to Bobbi with a flirtatious smile.

"What kind of name is Furgy?" I grumbled louder than I meant too.

Furgy turned to me, his smile falling, "It's Ferguson. Bobbi just calls me Furgy cause-"

"Cause it's cuter like him." Bobbi smiled.

"Sorry." I guess I could see why Bobbi didn't want me. He likes guys like Furgy.

"It's all good. What'll you have?"

"You pick, you always know what I need."

"Long Island Iced Tea comin' up."

Furgy looked up at me while he fixed Bobbi's drink. "I'll have uh, a whiskey?"

"You sure?"

"Yes." It was the only drink I knew right off. Furgy handed Bobbi his drink and quickly handed me mine and started working on another drink for someone else. The smell was awful and burned my nose. Bobbi watched Furgy intensely as he fixed another drink. I threw back the tiny shot glass immediately regretting it as the liquid somehow burned my throat and eyes. "Oh, God!" I coughed wishing I were dead.

"Here." Furgy sat a larger glass in front of me, "It's sex on the beach." I sipped at the drink enjoying the fruity flavors, it was much better than the whiskey that's for sure.

"Thank you."

"See, always trust Furgy." Bobbi smiled, "Thank you, sweetie, can you send us two more in a bit?"

"Sure thing." Furgy smiled back and Bobbi took me by my arm, his drink in the other hand.

We walked passed the bar and the booths through another door into a room filled with clothed tables filled with waiting spectators. "Come on, they found us a table." In only two corners there were booths facing out to the stage. In one corner booth sat Andy and Frankie.

"Where's Claire?"

"He's backstage with his momma."

"His mom is a drag queen?"

The boys giggled at my shock, "No." Andy snorted, "It's basically a mentor. Someone who teaches you the finer points of being a drag queen."

"So Claire's going to be a drag queen?"

"Maybe. His mom, his real mom that is, wants him to finish high school first then he might." It seemed odd to me, all I knew of drag queens were older men in bad wigs and giant clown-like breasts, I just couldn't Claire that way.

"What would-"

"Shh, it's starting." The already dim lights dimmed even further as the stage lit up and a woman in a green catsuit and a shiny shoulder stepped on to the stage. Her makeup was immaculate even from my far seat I could feel her commanding presence.

"Welcome queers and steers to QueenFish, the best damn club in the world!" The audience cheered and applauded.

"Who's that?" I shouted to Bobbi barely hearing my own voice over the applause.

"Bella Bag O'Trix. She's the owner."

"On top of our fabulous queens tonight, we have a few new girls who just might have some surprises for you. If you know what I mean." She allowed the crowd to enjoy the obvious double meaning before she continued, "Now, I know some of you out there may say" She posed like a glamor model, "'I could never be as pretty as she' but let me tell you right now. You're right." Her head snapped back to the audience sharply. The crowd laughed, "But, within every man is a queen waiting to get out. No really." Not that anyone seemed to disagree, "Let me see if I can find one." She walked through the audience of eager people, "Ah there's my queen." She pulled up a guy who looked more like a jock than a queen. "Now this is-What's your name dear?" He whispered, "Dale. Dear Dale." She guided him back onto the stage with her, "Dear Dale doesn't look much like a queen does he?" The audience agreed he did not. "

An upright box was wheeled out on stage by a half naked muscular man, "Thank you, Ralph, now get back to your cage." She slapped his butt as he walked back behind the curtain. "This is the queen in a box. We put some poor schlub in the box, no offense Dale," the audience laughed, "Now Dale's our schlub." She opened the box and shoved Dale inside, "Again no offense." She closed the box and turned to the audience once more, "And now-What?" An audience member shouted something I couldn't hear. "You know how it's done?" She listened to his response, "Another girl in the box?" She opened the box and showed Dale, "Dear Dale did you bring a girl with you? No? Okay then." She slammed the box on Dale again. "Oh behind him?" She turned the box around and opened the back door showing us Dale's backside. "Where? Dear Dale have you a girl in your backside?" The audience chuckled, "Guess not. But to put your mind at ease dear," she slammed the door again and this time locked it with a padlock, turned it around and locked the front as well. "There we go. No queens can get in or out."She knocked on the box, "Dear dale can you hear us?"

A muffled "Yes." Came from inside the box.

She began turning the box on the spot slowly at first, "You know what a centrifuge is Dear Dale?" She asked while we watched fascinated, "It separates the good from the bad." She spun the box faster and faster, "Right now we're separating all that schlubbiness and leaving only the queen." The box spun faster and faster until it made even me dizzy. Bella was now just slapping the box to keep it spinning and pretending to keep time on a watch on her wrist that didn't exist. "And done." She stopped the box suddenly. "Dear Dale are you ready to come out of the box?" The crowd chuckled as she unlocked the front box and out stumbled a gorgeous queen in a sequinned flapper dress that sparkled like a diamond in the spotlight. "My oh my, how do you feel now that you've gotten rid of all that schlub?" She helped the new queen to his feet.

"I..I do."

"Now we can't call you Dale anymore can we?"

"No momma."

"Momma, how sweet. Well if I'm a mother I suppose I have to give her a name." She walked around the nervous boy in drag examining him, "I know." She whispered in his ear. "Now, introduce yourself to the nice people."

"My name is Duella Dix but you can call me double D." He smiled as the audience applauded.

"Now why don't you go backstage with your sisters and we'll get this show started." Bella opened the box quickly shutting it back, "Woof, we might need to hose that down. Oh Ralph," Ralph quickly appeared still wearing only spandex shorts, "bring Momma a sponge, then call someone to clean this box." She marched out on her black booted heels as Ralph pulled the box behind him and off the stage while the audience laughed.

The next queen came on stage and began lip-synching to music so I took my opportunity to ask Bobbi, "Why did she keep calling him she?"

"When a queen is performing it's always she, sweetie."

"So bella is..."

"A man in drag."

"Oh." I guess I was wrong about drag queens too.

More and more queens came and went on stage all beautifully dressed and made up to the point you would think they were going to a beauty pageant. During intermission, A guy dressed like a cocktail waitress set a new set of drinks down and I realized I had finished my first one. It was just as sweet as before that if my fingers weren't slowly becoming numb I wouldn't believe there was any **** in it at all.

"Bobbi...do you-"

Bella interrupted me as she stepped back out on stage, "Alright darlings, we have a surprise for you, making her premiere debut!" Drums rolled through the speakers, "Charline McBride!" Claire stepped onto the stage his...her hair was teased up more than before and she looked even more like a woman with her black and gold dress that stopped just above her knee.

Slowly she approached a microphone that looked like it was right out of the golden age of radio. Music began as she took the mic in her long black, gloved hand and started singing 'Son of a Preacher Man' in a soft angelic voice I did not expect. His..her voice was melodic and soft, not that he was exactly a lumberjack before. Her vocal range was amazing! I could see couples in the dark kissing or holding hands. I thought about Kyle and where he might be now.

After her breathtaking singing, Bella came out and gave her a hug as the crowd applauded and cheered. The other peacocks and I whistled loudly cheering as loudly as we could hoping to get her attention. "A round of applause for our baby queen isn't she amazing!" The applause grew louder as Charline/Claire smiled so much I thought she'd cry. "Thank you all so much for coming, enjoy the rest of your evening wherever that leads you." The stage lights cut off and the room lights came up.

"Come on." Bobbi grabbed my hand and we all scrambled out of the booth not needing any further instructions. We weaved through the emptying tables and emptying crowd and ran on the stage and through the curtains where Ralph stopped us.

"Hey, you can't be here." He growled but he was still wearing extremely tight bike shorts that made me blush as I slammed right into his broad exposed chest.

"We know, uh...he...um." I suddenly forgot his name and everyone in the immediate vicinity including my own. I blame the ****.

"We know Claire, we're her friends." Andy pulled me back away from Ralph and I tried desperately not to look below Ralph's neck.

He turned around peering around the corner giving us a grand view of his butt, "Ooh, boy." I whispered and Andy clapped his hand over my mouth.

"Hey, Claire there's some boys here say they know you." We could hear the quick clatter of heels as Claire ran to us. Screaming excitedly when he saw us. We all hugged him excitedly. "Guess that's a yes." Ralph walked off around the corner.

"Come on." Claire took us further backstage where we saw the queens, some of whom were undressing. Seeing half-naked men with beautiful faces was very confusing for me but they acted like it was perfectly normal.

"I can't believe you didn't tell us!" Bobbi was the first to speak up.

"I wanted it to be a surprise." He sat at a large mirror and pulled false breasts out of his bra and threw them on the table with a plop, "How'd I do?"

"You were amazing!" We all agreed. After Claire changed back into his white skirt and matching top we all went back out into the club where I sat in a corner booth watching the people dance.

The people danced wildly against each other. Muscular looking guys like Kyle sometimes danced with other muscular guys while some danced against boys like me and Bobbi some of the boys even danced with each other. In the sea of men, you could see girls dancing with one another, very rarely you'd see girls dancing with boys but it seemed almost comical here not in the romantic or lustful way the others danced.

I was half-way through my fourth nameless fruity drink as Whitney Huston's 'dance with somebody' began playing. Bobbi suddenly grabbed my hand, "Dance with me!"

"I don't know how to dance!" I shouted over Whitney.

"Just hold on to me." Bobbi continued to pull me onto the center of the dance floor as I held on to my drink. Before I knew it Bobbi and I were grinding against one another like so many other coupled people I had seen while I sang along to the song taking every opportunity in the song to drink more.