why they call it a crush

"Queenfish is like the best gay club in town." Frankie explained, " We go every Saturday night to catch the drag show."

"You're gonna love it." Claire sat on the sleeping bag next to me carrying a glass of coke.

We spent the rest of the night watching romantic comedies. I didn't know there were so many movies with gay people. Some were good some were bad but I found myself relating to a few of them as one boy struggled with questioning if he was gay or not. One by one we drifted off to sleep, Frankie and I were the last two still awake as he put in another movie. "Jerry," he whispered as he scooted closer to me.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think your brother likes me?"

"Like, likes you?"

"Yeah."

"I don't think he's gay." Maybe it was cruel I don't know but I didn't want him to get his hopes up.

"What about bi?"

"Bi?"

"Some people like both."

"Oh. I don't know. I'm sorry."

"It's okay hun. If you find out you'll tell me right?"

"First thing."

"Good, then I still love you." He smiled sleepily and threw his arm around me hugging me tightly with his one arm before turning back to the tv. I wonder if I should tell Brian about Frankie's feelings.

The next afternoon they went over what my morning routine should be for flawless skin like theirs and we reapplied our makeup, I managed to do a halfway decent job on my own which made me super happy but after doing my makeup three times a day I suppose I was bound to start getting better. Surprisingly we spent most of the day at the local arcade. I saw some large looking guys who look like they worked out constantly. Bobbi assured me we were being checked out when he saw the fearful look on my face.

We went back to Claire's house and redid our makeup, like date makeup, you can't wear just regular makeup to the club. I did the best I could but I had let Bobbi help me out with my eyeshadow. I always loved when he did it for me. He would sit in my lap every time. Claire kept a watchful eye on us while he did his own makeup. I know what he was thinking, letting Bobbi sit on me is definitely going to not help me get over him, "Well don't you boys look adorable." A woman came in later that night around dinner time, and Bobbi stood off of me and returned to his own face.

"Thanks, mom." Claire's mom looked like a femme fatale from the 40s with her black suit jacket and white blouse and her knee-length professional black skirt and black heels. She stretched her and cracked her neck before fixing her stunning green eyes on me.

"I'm Teresa, Claire's mother." She offered me her hand and I shook it gently like the peacocks taught me.

"Jerry." She reminded me of an actress I saw in a movie once with my mom. I think her name Lauren something.

She grabbed a stick of eyeliner, "May I?" I smiled and she bent over to apply the eyeliner to my face. If I looked down I could see her breasts in her shirt. I think she caught me cause she started laughing for no reason. She turned my face and finished me off with the other eye. "There you go. Every angel needs a pair of wings." She turned me back to the mirror and my eyes looked so dramatic now.

"I love it, thank you."

"You're welcome, sweetheart." She hugged me, I was really loving this, I admit I have always been a hugger. "Okay, I'll get out of your lovely hair and I guess I'll see you until late tonight?" Claire said something but I couldn't hear him. I was mesmerized by Teresa as she brushed my hair back with her hand like my mom used to do when I was little. "Just be safe and don't drink too much. You know I worry about my little angels." She kissed my forehead and smiled again as she left.

"I think I love your mom."

Claire laughed, "Everybody does."

"She's kinda like the group mom anyway." Bobbi finished applying his lipstick and blew a kiss at his reflection. I knew Bobbi didn't have a mom in the same sense I had but I wondered if Frankie or Andy didn't.

"Do your parents all know that you're all..."

"Gay?"Andy asked, "Yeah."

"My dad knows, I don't know about my mom." Frankie sighed and I felt I touched a nerve.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean-"

"It's okay, my mom left us and so my dad moved here and I met these lovely bitches and my dad is great, so I win."

"At least you have your dad."

"And my mom."

"Of course." Frankie smiled, "Teresa is great."

"Do your parents not know?" Claire wrapped his hair around a curling iron.

"...No." I was barely sure myself so I didn't wanna go half cocked and tell them something I didn't even know for sure yet. All I knew was I liked Kyle and Bobbi. Maybe that was all it took to qualify me as gay.

"That's okay." Claire slipped his hair free, it bouncing back into a curl, and put his hand on my shoulder, "You can have my mom too." I hugged Claire again so grateful for my new friends.

"Hey, don't leave us out." Bobbi, Andy, and Frankie suddenly joined us in a hug.

"Alright! Enough of this maudlin crap. We got things to do!"