As you'll ever be.

What the hell. You swallow the pills.

Whenever you imagined taking the pills, you expected it would be a long, drawn-out process. You would be able to feel yourself shrinking, clench your fingers as they became delicate and dainty. You'd even be able to watch as your penis drew back into you and reshaped itself into a womanly vagina.

The reality is much quicker, and more overwhelming. They don't call it "fast-acting" for nothing, it would seem. You see stars, then clench your eyes shut as it feels like every part of your body is about to burst out of your skin at once. Then for one never-ending second, your brain goes dark, as if it's just stopped receiving any sensory input, or perhaps too much to process.

Then you're back. You hear panting, quick and high, like someone left a porno on. It takes a moment for you to realize that that sound is, in fact, you and your newly feminine voice, short of breath after the shock of transformation. This will be the first of many adjustments you must make over the next eight hours.

You instinctively look down. You're still wearing a t-shirt and jeans, and you can tell. Your shirt is hugging your chest, and squeezing tight on your new tits. What a rush it is to experience cleavage from this particular angle. You can't see much beyond that, so you trace your hands over your stomach -never muscular to begin with, but now quite flat and trim- and along the curves of your expanded hips and rump. With a hesitant hand, you make a ball-cupping motion.

Yup, completely flat.