To the Tavern

I follow Lexa outside, only to be greeted by a cold breeze that storms through the hole in my pants. Great, I'm literally going to freeze my balls off in this hellhole called Dravenport. Lexa leads me down some alleyways until we find ourselves at the back door of the tavern.

"What are we doing here?"

"This is where my guards are meeting with the robbers."

"How do you know that?"

"Because investigating is part of my job." Lexa proceeds to pull out a dagger. "Take this. Even with your 'sword', you might need it."

As much as I didn't enjoy the idea of murdering people, I'm not in a position to say no. Lexa draws her sword, and then says "Be quick, before you draw too much attention."

We enter some sort of kitchen, where a young elven woman is scrubbing the dishes. For once, someone in this town does not notice my wardrobe malfunction and we continue into the dining room. Lexa and I storm the stairs and towards room six.

"This is where the leader is staying." Lexa whispers. "I'll keep a lookout. You go in and deal with him."

"Are you serious?"

"Well, you'll draw too much attention."

"Fine then."

I enter the room, leaving the dagger behind. I am met by a bearded man wearing a bulky coat.

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

"You're under arrest."

The bearded man bursts out laughing. It's a rather feminine laugh, which catches me off guard.

"What, you going to stab me with that sword between your legs?" They say in a deep voice, that sounds slightly off.

"Look, the captain wants your head. It's best you go quietly."

"Hmmm, really?"

"Yes."

"How about I make you an offer." Much like the laugh, the person's voice is much more feminine now. I stand there confused as the person reveals what they want. Under the coat is a slim body of a female, with her moderately-sized breasts out on full display. Next, the woman removes the fake beard, showing the small, round face with lips in the shape of a deviant smile.

"Seeing as I'm caught, how about you fuck me? I haven't had a good fuck in months."