No, Really, What?

It's a surreal experience to be questioning your own sanity when you've evolved into a floating mass of eyes and magic in what you suspect is less than 24 hours, but here you are all the same. The menu in front of you is plain and to the point but you find it hard to understand what's going on. The next button flashes and you dumbly press it, greeted by a new set of menus.

"Welcome to your first Lair. To streamline this experience we will tutorialize your first lair with some presets and modules. For your next Lair and any future expansions you make, you may turn off these tutorials."

"Lairs are strongholds and bases of operation that allow you to begin tracking your territory and control, as well as accrue Rule. Rule is a currency you will use to acquire additional territory, modules, customize traps and functions or simply upgrade existing features of your lair."

"We see you have already gained Hostages! This is a key component of acquiring Rule. Each character that is a member of a Guild you take hostage begins accruing Rule for you. At the same time, the Guilds of these hostages are alerted to their situation and may choose to rescue them, so be careful! All players who die in your territory also grant Rule. Rule also passively increases based on existing Lair features and upgrades."

"It looks like you're just starting out, so we're going to go ahead and place your first module for you. Remember, you can upgrade this later using Rule!"

As that menu disappears, you realize your empty black void, which you were starting to get uses to, has been replaced by a dark stone room. It is certainly spacious to some degree, though you have no grasp of how big it is compared to the rest of the world. It's made of the same simple brick as the area outside and behind you now manifests a door, doubtlessly leading back out from where you came.

"This is the core of your Territory, your Lair! Inside you constantly regenerate health and mana, and you may add a variety of functions to it over time using your Rule. For now, we're going to add some basic pieces for you!"

Without warning a large, square wooden frame appears in the center of the room, adorned with pillows and cushions. It looks big enough for a small group of people, while in the four corners of the room torches appear to light it. The back wall seems to fold inward in the middle, slanting into a narrow recess where a large chest appears with an almost comically oversized lock and chains around it. The left hand side of the back wall quickly manifests several cages, each one roughly eight feet by eight feet and each one locked. A keyring forms around one of your eye-stalks now, and a crystalline orb forms in the air above the cushion pile from before.

"There we go! The central object is a Rest Space, which resets all of your timers and heals you to full health as you sleep. The orb above it is your Monitor. It can show you an overview of your territory and also allows you to link it's sight to later upgrades for your territory."

"Your storage chest is accessible only by you and items inside can be broken down for Rule or used to build items for modules. Some items may be converted to monster only gear or items. "

"Your cages will allow you to securely lock away hostages. They may not send messages, communicate outside of a certain range or equip items while inside. Rogues and other classes may use Smuggle to carry in tools to escape, so watch out!"

"Finally, you also have access to servants. These characters will perform simple functions inside your lair and are unlocked at different Rule levels. Let's meet your first one now!"

Light seems to pool in one spot of the room, forming into the vague outline of a small humanoid shape, roughly three feet tall and a bit round, before it explodes into flesh and blood. A short, portly goblin in an ill-fitting business suit and vest now stands in front of you, holding a clipboard and a quill. He looks up at you now with a concerned grimace. "Evening boss! I'm Guri, yer steward. Ah'll be the one managing your whatsists and coordinating your jingly pieces when you're not away and I'll make sure your kidnappey people don't run off!"

You find any confidence you had in Guri up until this point unceremoniously draining into the screaming chasm of your soul. A menu pops into existence, as if to answer your internal pleas for anything else to be in charge for you.

"If you're not satisfied with any of the servants provided by the system you may replace them with any hostages or party members who have achieved the Loyal status. Note that characters selected to be servants cannot leave the lair, and thus cannot be used as party members. "

"That concludes the Lair tutorial! Please make good use of your new lair and remember to spend your Rule wisely!"

As the final menu fades away, it is replaced by a number of dropdowns and boxes, one displaying your current Rule at 43, while another showed you active servants and features. You look to Guri. "Ello boss! What's we going to do with this here junk?" He asked, motioning to his own clipboard and quill. You shuttle him into the inactive column, watching as he abruptly disappears with a pop into thin air and leaving you alone to gather your thoughts...

You needed a safe place to sleep and this sure took that cake, and ran with it too. Now you had a way to start your process, your **** and retribution...But you were also confused. Who designed something like this that could only possibly benefit someone or something like yourself?