Murasaki (M), in an all-girls school in the afterlife.

Here I was in a beautiful classroom with a high-vaulted ceiling and numerous ornate carvings in the wood. I was seated at a comfortable and large desk with a magic pen that never ran out of ink and a mystical notebook that I could lock so that nobody but me could open it. I was surrounded by a veritable ocean of women with a variety of both mundane and exotic appearances, but all sharing the common traits of being absolutely gorgeous and either amazingly busty or perfectly flat as a board.

They were in uniform, as this was one of those kinds of academies, but the outfits seemed like they were designed by someone like me. The white and gold blazers and milky pink blouses were tailored specifically to show off cleavage with a criminally low neckline that often went below the breasts, and their magenta skirts were so short they may as well have not even been there, always showing off an incredible amount of thigh. I lost count of the number of times I had seen the panties of the girls at this academy by happenstance. Even my teacher was gorgeous in a dark and brooding way with raven hair, pale skin, and a silk black dress that revealed far too much for a teacher.

And everyone at this academy was exclusively female with the exception of yours truly. This was a pervert’s paradise.

And I hated it. This was the afterlife I was sentenced to, and when I first got here a week ago, it seemed like it was going to be heaven, but it was more like a personal hell. Let me explain.

To the surprise of basically nobody, I was just as bad at school in the afterlife as I was while I was alive. Here I thought that I was done with all my education affairs after graduating high school; it was even the celebration of this accomplishment that resulted in my untimely . I was on my way back home from the store after getting party supplies and got bumped into the road by someone as soon as a truck was passing by.

As a brief aside, of all the ways to go out, why did it have to be just like one of those overused isekai anime tropes? I could think of any number of better ways to go out. One, being drowned by boobs. Two, suffocating under a hot chick as she sat on my face. Three, jumping off a roof into a pool of girls in bikinis. Hell, I’d even be cool with dying to the infamous “truck-kun” if it was to save a girl from being hit. I was so disappointed by this turn of events; I would have even accepted getting a heart attack from thinking I was going to get hit by a truck that was actually a slow-moving tractor.

But when I arrived here in Melfluere a week ago, I found out that not only was I killed in the most cliché way imaginable for an otaku like myself, I would have to attend school again so I could get myself accustomed to daily life in this new afterlife.

This afterlife, by the way, was the specific afterlife of a very specific world, Halphor, not Earth. This meant a couple things, firstly, nobody here knew anything about the world I came from, and secondly, everyone here was, like me, technically dead and reincarnated. If that wasn’t enough, every person who ended up here was supposed to have a job, like a character class in an RPG, assigned to them by the time they got here. That apparently never happened for me, so I was stuck being jobless and the academy’s administration had no idea what to do about me. I would have loved to be an awesome knight or a powerful mage, that might have at least meant I could have treated this afterlife like a never-ending game of Lairs and Liches, but no. Instead I was just a guy while all these fellow students got to have all the fun.

So here I was, sulking and brooding at my desk in the Faerie Arts Academy staring blankly across the room, peering around at the different students, primarily their “assets”. While the teacher in front of the class went on about the history of Melfluere. History had always been one of my worst subjects in school, and that was back in a world I was familiar with and grew up in. There wasn’t a single ray of hope that I would be able to internalize the history of a completely different universe.

The only good news about any of this was that I looked amazing, incredibly handsome, and completely unlike what I used to look like. This was apparently because people who come to this afterlife took on their most idealized form. This meant the girls were all extremely attractive and for some reason none of them seemed to mind much when I stared at whatever I wanted. The worst reaction I would get was an embarrassed blush, but never outright anger or disgust. In fact, being the only man in the academy and being from a different world made me fairly popular.

Once again, dream come true for a pervert like me, right?

Not quite, this was mitigated by the fact that there was no porn in this afterlife, and just because I was popular with the ladies didn’t mean that I could just get away with relieving my horniness with or around them. I frequently got restless sleep because of the horny dreams I would have, and I’d wake up needing to crank one out before I could go back to sleep.

This was such a big problem that I found myself extremely tired right now, and even the erotic view of the students and the droning voice of my teacher wasn’t enough to keep my eyes open. Eventually, my head fell into my arms, and I began snoozing and dreaming.

---

I was in a dark void, blackness stretched out in every direction with two exceptions, a pair of spotlights. One of them was centered on me, another was pointing at the only other person in this inky abyss. It was a woman with long blonde hair dressed in what appeared to be a toga. She was face down on the ground.

I was about to be concerned for this woman, but then I saw what she had grasped in her right hand, a familiar sort of amber bottle. It was beer.

“Uh, hello?” I greeted, not knowing what else to do.

“Oh shit,” she said, “hello there.”

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“Fine, fine, just…” she drifted off, and I was about to assume she had passed out before she suddenly and loudly began again, “I’m just drunk everything is all.” She was slurring her words heavily, sloshing through her sentences like water in a flood.

“Okay.”

“Who are you again?” she began to stand up, and I had to admit she was stunningly beautiful, but her current state of intoxication was having an impact on how truly attractive she was to me, especially since she looked like a newborn deer trying to learn to walk as she got up.

“Murasaki.”

“Oh yeah, Murski. Japanese for ‘orange’, right?” She rubbed a slender hand across her forehead and peered at me with baby blue eyes.

“It’s uh, Mu-ra-sa-ki, and it means purple.”

“That’s what I said,” she replied, a dazed look on her face.

I shook my head, exasperated, “Where am I?”

“Dreamscape. I brought you here… for some reason. I was gonna tell you something, but I can’t remember what. I’m Anterose, goddess of uh… something. How ya doin’?”

I blinked and pinched my nose between my forefinger and my thumb. This wasn’t going to end well, “Fine, I guess. I got dropped off in the wrong afterlife, though.”

She blinked this time and then narrowed her eyes, “Whatcha mean?”

“Like, I’m in Melfluere, and apparently I’m not supposed to be there. That’s Halphor’s afterlife, not Earth’s. The receptionist said something about a clerical error.”

“Oh yeah! You’re Murasaki,” she said, “why didn’t you say so earlier?”

I had the distinct feeling this conversation was going nowhere fast, “Look, do you have the power to get me where I’m supposed to be?”

She shook her head, “Fraid not, would be a burrocratical nightmare and I’m way too drunk to focus on that right now.” She laughed in a grating way that only drunk people can manage.

“Will you do it when you’re sober?” I asked.

She shrugged, “Sure but uh, gonna take a while. You have any idea how long an alcoholic buzz lasts for a god? Decades. Don’t even get me started on the hangover.”

“So, I’m stuck in Melfluere for decades?”

“At least. What are you so disappointed about? Melfluere is a great place for a horny perv like you. Sexy ladies as far as the eye can see. Speaking as a proud lesbin, it’s one of my favorites.” She chuckled and took a swig from the bottle in her hand. What was that, another year added to my time in Melfluere going into her belly? This was bad.

“I’m disappointed because even though they don’t mind when I look, it just makes me horny and then I lose sleep. Also, apparently, I was supposed to have some ‘job’ thingy assigned to me, but I never got one.”

The drunken goddess blinked, “Wait, don’t let me forget about the job thing, but first, wait.” She then paused, and then belched, “Thanks. Have you not been doing anything with any of the girls?”

“Excuse me?”

“Like, you know, sexy stuff.”

“Why would I do that? I’ve only known them for like, a week. They haven’t approached me or anything.”

“You’ve been there a week!?” She exclaimed, “Shit, dude, I’m sorry, that’s one-fitty percent my bad bro. I meant to show up after your first night to esplain some of this stuff. Guess I passed out.”

I couldn’t help myself. I felt a heat burn up behind my ears and I planted my face firmly into my palm before letting out an exasperated sigh.

“Okay so, first thing. You gotta have a job. I’ll whip you up something right now, something unique to show you how sorry I am.”

“Wait, that seems like a bad—” I began but was cut off by what felt like a surge of power coursing through my whole body as I was bathed in a bright pink light. When it subsided, I was worried. I had a unique class created by a drunk goddess, who even knew what would be in this thing? Somehow, I found that I could easily conjure an image in my mind of my stats. It was very surreal to have numerical values attached to nearly every aspect of my being, even stranger was the job’s apparent name.

“Eromancer?”

Anterose beamed proudly, “Like a sexy magician. Perfect for an afterlife full of busty fantasy girls, right?”

I mentally briefly skimmed all of the class skills, which was also a weird feeling. Like reading a book that was in my mind. Nearly all of the skills seemed to be locked at the moment, “This doesn’t help me. I wouldn’t feel comfortable using these powers on anyone. What kind of guy do you think I am, a ?”

“Oh, right, that part. Look kiddo, you can get away with a lot more than you think you can with these girls, and it won’t be considered bad at all.”

“Why?” I asked simply, not comfortable with taking her word on the matter.

“What do I look like t’you kid? A character whose only purpose is for expository dialogue?”

“Actually, yes. In fact, if this were an anime or a videogame, that is precisely what you’d be.”

“Oh,” she replied as though this possibility genuinely hadn’t occurred to her, then seemed to get lost in thought.

“Then again, those characters usually aren’t drunk.”

She was still silent, evidently considering the situation carefully, “Okay look, that particular part of Melfluere where the actdemmy is has a very unique population. Each one of the schools in Mefluere is home to different kinds of people from Halphor. Specifically, many likeminded individuals who all died having the same sort of regrets. I’ll give you three guesses as to what kinda ladies the Faerie Arts Academamy are. Go on guess.”

“No.” I replied simply.

“Such a stick in the mud. Fiiine I’ll tell you,” she sighed dramatically, “they’re all girls who died at eighteen, nineteen, and twenty who never got to have sexual experiences, and regret it. But a lot of them never got to have any because they weren’t really the sorts to seek it out. I can tell you right now that there are dozens of those girls who would love nothing more than for you to do all sorts of naughty things with them. You’re popular for a reason, stud.”

I blinked, “Wait, really?” If she wasn’t just fucking with me, that did change a lot of things.

“Now befurr you go and get too excited there, tiger, this comes with a couple snags. Can’t just give you total free reign, there are a few rules you gotta follow. If you don’t follow them, I’ll stick you in an all-male school full of nerdy virgins like you. Understood?” She pointed at me as she said this, making her nearly lose balance topple over again.

“I suppose that’s fair,” I said, slightly worried that this was going to sour the whole thing.

“First rule. You can’t knowingly use your penis on, around, with, or near any ladies unless they take the initiative. Accidents are okay, but nothing else unless they ask you for it or they start it. After the first time, you're free to request that stuff whenever, but consent is always key.”

“Why?” I asked.

She paused, took another swig of her drink, then continued as though I hadn’t asked anything, “Next rule, when it comes to any other kind of flirting or sexual contact, you are permitted to take the inishtiv, but no means no. If the girl gives any kind of indication that she doesn’t want what you’re doing, and trust me, these cats will make it clear, you better stop right there and not try whatever it was you did for at least another day. Two strikes and yer out!” she mimicked a swinging motion like she had just swung a baseball bat, which also nearly toppled her, “But don’t let this stop you from espermenting, they aren’t gonna hate you if you make one strike unless you bug ‘em about it. And if they let you do it once, it’s a done deal, you can do the same thing with them as much as you want.”

I didn’t bother trying to ask anything this time, I supposed it really didn’t matter. This was technically a divine mandate. Very technically.

“The final rule is more of a descriptive one, meaning it’s a rule that you actually can’t break whether you wanna or not. I’m just letting you know about it so you don’t get your hopes up. It is a metaphyskul law that any woman who dies with her virginity will be born and remain a virgin in the afterlife. Now, remember that I mentioned that everyone in the Faerie Arts Acdem… Acadamama…”

“They’re all virgins.”

“Right, that.”

“So, I can’t have intercourse with them, is what you’re saying.”

“Fraid not. But!” she exclaimed at pointed at me again. Then paused a moment before giggling and staring off into space, “hehe, butt…”

“But what?”

“Uh, that Eromancer class has a skill you can get later that will let you undo that third rule if you want. But it’s like, gonna be really hard to unlock.”

“Why’s that?”

“Cuz I don’t remember how to do it,” she replied honestly and then hiccoughed.

There was silence as I let this all sink in. This really did change everything. These rules didn’t even seem all that bad either, it just made it a little more interesting. Honestly, just knowing that these girls were probably just as horny for me as I was for them was enough. I did just have one question.

“Okay so, if all the girls here are into me, why haven’t they done anything? I’ve been here for a week.”

“Oh, kiddo, if you could hear the gossip they’ve been spreading. It’s like, horniness that rivals even yours. Never undermestate the sheer lust that can come from a perverted girl who has her sights set on a guy. The thing is, unlike guys, we tend to be a little more subtle. Also, what do you take them for, rapists?” She asked, calling back to what I said earlier.

The point was made loud and clear with that question. It was the same reason I hadn’t tried anything with them, they had only known me a week, and didn’t really know how I felt about it. And since I wasn’t making the first move, they truly had no idea what I was comfortable with.

“Anyway, you happy now? Can I go back to napping?” She asked.

“I think I’m—” I began but was cut off.

“Okay, bye!” and with that last exclamation, the dream had ended.