Vocal reality warping

A lot had changed recently for mutants everywhere with the creation of the mutant island nation known as Krakoa. Unlike the tragedy of Genosha, Krakoa was a living island, offering humans everywhere that extended their lifespans and cured diseases, giving humans across the world a reason to avoid hostility. The island also acted as a living security system that prevented any human from so much as setting foot on the island without a mutant's permission. Mutants now finally had a homeland that promised safety, community and even functional immortality for them should they simply walk through the biologically produced teleportation portals deposited in various countries. With the powers of the mutant group known as The Five and the boosted power of Charles Xavier, any mutant they knew of could have copies of their minds saved and redeposited into cloned copies of their bodies should they die. Any mutant, ethical or monstrous, could live happily on the island. Friends and enemies put aside their old hatreds, with only of the few new laws of the land being that a mutant was not allowed to kill any human and the other being that making new mutants was encouraged - resulting in several surprisingly lusty connections.

With all of that said, not every mutant yet resided happily on the island nation . . .

***
Bonnie Barrington was the sort of girl that most people ignored. Shy, quiet, petite and mousy, she was the fourth child in a family of five in London. Her family was almost aggressively banal, with her mother and father running a small pub and all of her older siblings either having gone off to university or found other ways to hog the limelight, leaving her with the role of dutiful daughter . . . and waitress.

"B. B., love, get those chips over to table five and for God's sake, try to smile, will you?" her Mum said as he shoved a tray towards her from within the kitchen.

"Yes, Mum." the twenty year old murmured, pushing her frizzy brown hair behind one ear and picking up the tray and heading over to a table of boisterous football fans. She wasn't a fan of what the Americans called soccer or sports in general really, but in their pub, Arsenal was king and meatheads abounded. She pulled her red apron over her white sweater and shapeless black skirt (Arsenal's colors, since they had a match on), emphasizing what meager curves she possessed in hopes for a tip. Tiny and rail thin, her two sisters joked that they used up all the boobs by the time B. B. came around and often teased her by calling her "A. A." when they felt like being mean. She didn't have the looks of her sisters or the brains or brawn of her brothers, just a kind heart and a hope that someday someone would notice her and drag her away from her banal existence - just that somehow her life would matter or become more than this.

"Took you long enough." was the only grunting response as she dropped off the food and drink to the table of men whose eyes focused on the soccer game on a nearby TV more than her. She smiled weakly, not that any of them noticed, before moving back to the bar where her Dad also stared enraptured at the game, ignoring her like everyone else.

Slumping miserably on a stool and waiting for Mum to bellow again to serve a bunch of idiots, she turned on her phone and read through the news. She sucked in a breath of excitement at a photo of the Avengers fighting Namor and his Atlanteans. She was secretly bisexual and constantly fantasized about all of the sexy American superheroes (and even the pretty villains like Namor, if she was being honest), not to mention locals like the beefy former Captain Britain and his beautiful bride Meggan.

B. B. especially envied and lusted after the She-Hulk, even with her new, more muscular look. Not for the first time, daydreams overtook her. God, what would it be like to have a body no one could ignore? To be strong, powerful and famous? To have any one she fancied rushing to her side with just a come hither glance? Briefly, she imagined herself like the She-Hulk, big, powerful, beautiful, surrounded by lustful, adoring men and women, all with superhuman proportions and beauty, spoiled for choice-

"Oi, girlie! Me and my mates need another round!" came a yell from another table, breaking the bubble of her daydream.

She shook her head, irritated at herself for having such a stupid fantasy.

"Coming right up!" she replied with false cheer, turning to her Dad, who was nodding and already filling up another four pint glasses.

"Buck up, B. B.! I think the blonde one fancies you!" Dad said with a smile and a pat on her shoulder. B. B. rolled her eyes. Dad always tried to buck up her spirits but she may as well be invisible to most men and she knew it.

"C'mon, Dad, all they fancy is watching Arsenal and drinking beer." she muttered but took the drinks anyways, rolling her eyes at him as she wandered over to the other table.

The blonde one Dad had mentioned actually wasn't terribly bad looking and around her age - a bit gangly but with a strong jaw and nice features that she could mistake for Captain America's in a bad light - so she shyly ventured a smile as she approached.

"Here's your drinks! Do you boys need anything else?"

"We're all set, love, unless one of your sisters are back from university." joked one of the group, a thickset dark haired fellow who was something of a regular, back when her older sisters used to tend the bar and draw a crowd.

"Don't be a pig, Darrin." the blonde said more kindly. "We're all good, love, cheers."

His attention faded immediately however as a goal was scored and the entire bar erupted in cheers.

She sighed and muttered under her breath.

"I wish something actually important would interrupt their stupid sodding game!"

The cheers quickly turned to boos as suddenly the field was rocked by a large fireball and a female figure digging a trench through the field as the players ran for cover and fans in the stands panicked.

"Fuck off!" snarled Darrin.

"Is that the new Captain Britain? She better be there to get her damn kit off for interrupting an Arsenal game!" came another mocking voice.

"Fucking hell, is that a dragon?"

B. B.'s heart leapt as she saw the new Captain Britain, a beautiful mutant woman with purple hair who used to go by Psylocke, pick herself up from the trench she'd made to face down what appeared to be an actual dragon! The dragon was being ridden by a slim Asian woman who was shouting something and it spewed flame - directly to the right of Captain Britain.

A strange crystalline robot appeared in the flames as they cascaded the space near the purple-haired beauty, it's apparent stealth mode disabled by the dragon's flames. Her face displayed a fierce triumph as she called into existence a huge purple sword and rammed it into the robot's core.

A wave of cheers came across the bar from the fickle crowd, as they all loved Captain Britain and a bit of . The robot exploded spectacularly as the woman pulled up and out, slicing it in half from the chest up. The dragon bent down and grabbed the remains, shaking them like a chew toy before tossing them out of the stadium and flying away after them. Betsy Braddock, the new Captain Britain, shook out her long, purple tresses majestically and gave the crowd a mock courtesy before launching herself into the air after the dragon.

"Aw, c'mon! She could have at least hung around and taken her top off after ruining the damn match!"

"Hey, show some respect, that's the new Captain Britain!"

"Sod that, my Captain Britain's a bloke! A real man's man with a Page 3 girl of a wife, not this imitation!"

"She could be my Captain Britain any time. Well, either really, but God, just imagine?" B. B. sighed to herself wistfully, ignored by everyone as the cameras followed the beautiful new Captain Britain up and out of the stadium. "Be quite the joke on these idiots if she fancied girls, wouldn't it? I wish!"

***
Betsy took to the air to make sure that the time-traveling Sentinel known as Nimrod had been properly disposed of but it seemed she needn't have bothered. Rogue and Shego in dragon form seemed to be bouncing his scorched remains around like a pinball in the air, with Gambit tossing a few exploding cards at it for good measure. In a matter of seconds, it seemed that the machine - which had appeared with some sort of announcement about destroying the most powerful mutant who ever lived - had been reduced to flaming bits of scrap.

"Well! Seems we've sorted this, although I don't think I'll be welcomed again in any pubs after ruining that match anytime soon."

"Sorry, Sugah, I just love smashing me some robots!" Rogue said with a smile as she crunched a crystalline arm in her hands into a ball, then tossed it in the air and punched it, blowing a kiss at its remains flying away.

God, she was fucking sexy, Betsy thought, then blinked at herself in shock for thinking that. Usually that sort of thought was reserved for Gambit, not Rogue. Experimentally, she snuck a glance and Gambit and felt . . . nothing? That was odd. She'd never been attracted to other women in her life. Where was this coming from?

***
"Ugh. I may as well wish that the original Captain Britain and his wife showed up in a limo to whisk me away for a night of passion I'd never forget." B. B. sighed, shaking her head at her own foolishness. It wasn't like she'd even have a chance with any of these sexy super types even if they'd walked in the pub that instant.

***
Meggan frowned sadly. Her beloved Brian had been so sad after loosing the mantel of Captain Britain and almost nothing she did seemed to break him out of his deep funk. The shapeshfiter knocked gently on their bedroom door before entering, only to find him in a robe, unshaven and wearing just a pair of pajama bottoms, watching the television.

"Brian? I was just- oh, is that Elizabeth on the telly?"

"Yeah. Can't escape a reminder of my troubles even when just trying to watch a match." her husband responded in a miserable tone of voice. Meggan's empathic abilities weren't needed to register his sadness and self-pity, his tone of voice did the job just fine.

She moved over to her husband and put a slim hand on his broad, muscular shoulder.

"Brian, I know you're feeling terrible right now but-"

An idea suddenly registered in her mind that seconds ago would have been offensive and ludicrous but now seemed exactly right.

"I think I have exactly the thing to bring you out of this funk. How about we go into a limo, pick up a waitress from a pub and take her home to have sex with her together? Give her the night of her life?"

Brian stood up with a smile and nodded, his misery vanishing.

"I think that's a perfect idea, my love! Let me get shaved and changed. Wear your old costume, yeah? I always did love that shade of green on you."

The busty blonde beauty smiled, so happy to finally have found something to cheer up the love of her life, then ran off to get ready, humming happily to herself.