The Totally-Not-Her-Brother Prince

Wow, some of these are higher concept than you'd anticipated. You were prepared for, like, The Evil Prince, and maybe like a prince who sings a lot. Frankly you didn't think it would be all that much more complex than "The Red Prince, The Blue Prince Et Cetera Blah Blah Blah". But what the fuck? The "Time-Travelled From The Immediate Future Prince"? The "Princely Ghost Possessing Another Prince Prince"? The...wait, what? The "Prince Who Is Also The Musician Prince Prince"? You and your increasingly maddening headache aren't prepared for this. Like, look at this one: The-Totally-Not-Her-Brother Prince?

Well, the little descriptive cartoon manages to make it plan enough. A little cartoon prince wearing a not at all disguising domino mask is being rapturously embraced by a little cartoon princess. And there is what can only be a family portrait directly behind them of what can only be the prince and princess locked in a much more familial hug. For instance, in the portrait the princess is not cupping a big handful of the prince's dick through his leggings. Which, you note with a widening of your eyes, she is definitely doing in the tableau before it. What. The. Fuck. Headache or no headache, you have to hear more about this one.

Who do all these other princes think they are, coming into YOUR kingdom and trying to win over YOUR sister? You're as fearless and stunningly handsome as any of them, aren't you? Heck, even more so! She's your princess; you saw her first! So put on your mask, Mystery Knight, enter the contest totally disguised, and show those clowns that if anyone is going to marry YOUR sister, it's YOU! ARE YOU THE TOTALLY-NOT-HER-BROTHER PRINCE?

You gasp in a breath of air as you quickly grab hold of either side of the table, catching yourself as the lightness in your head surges into a full on dizzy spell. You clench your eyes shut and shake your head, what is going on? You barely manage to crack one eye open and check the box labelled "Yes" before you tumble out of your chair, the blinding glare of the room flaring up to white out your conscious mind.