Princess Lin's Preorder Bonus

A few thoughts strike you as you emerge from the stairway, Princess Lin beckoning you closer with a demure little smile. First, she really is gorgeous and she smells nice even from this far away and wow OMG. Second, you were so eager to pop up for your little post fight chat that you neglected to put your shirt back on. And Third, and perhaps most curiously of all, neither of those previous two things particularly freak you out. You've heard of Fake It 'Til You Make It, but this is more...uh...Fake Knowing How You Made It.

Hopefully your responsibilities won't include sloganeering.

The Geas floats over to direct you to a seat a decorous distance from Lin, the somewhat dragon-y girl folding her hands in her lap. Fuck. "I trust you won't mind if I drop my formalities?" she offers, fixing you with those pale green eyes. Fuck. She even has a posh little accent; that got buried in the tidal wave of all the rest of her. You quickly shake your head, and she favors you with a grateful smile before continuing on. "You clearly know the qualities warrior a requires, Sir. I wonder, do you know the qualities required for a Princess?"

Uh....Grace? A little crown? Boobs roughly around a C-Cup? A dad who's King? "Why don't you enlighten me?"

She flashes you that almost teasing smile again. Goddammit. "Since birth, Sir, I have been trained in all that a royal heiress may require." She casually fans out the fingers of one hand, inspecting her nails as her other continues to lightly stroke her chubby tail. "I have had a classical education to rival any in the world. I am as thoroughly trained in courtly manners as I am in the matters of politics and administration." She leans forward with a conspiratorial wink, treating you to an extra half inch of pale cleavage that you do not take for granted. "I will confess I was not so skilled at painting, but even Geas must admit I am a particularly talented dancer."

She straightens, folding her hands properly in her lap once again. "But all of that is ultimately a second thought. Because the one quality all Princesses truly require is virginity."

You nod along; right, that all makes.....uh, did she say virginity?

If your confusion is apparent, Princess Lin seems to make nothing of it as she continues on with an airy tone to her dulcet voice. "And, to be frank, it has created something of a glut on the market. Any backwater monarch's cross-eyed daughter can slap together a scepter and have herself listed as a Princess, as long as her thighs have been nailed shut."

So, uh, wait, is this all about...what is this all about?

Lin sighs, giving you a look of dramatic frustration. "It is not an exaggeration that I have been groomed to be the finest young woman of noble birth in all the realms. But why should anyone care, when there are a dozen or so other technically adequate Princesses right around the bend? But while they remain unsullied, the chaff continues to mix freely with the wheat."

You're starting to think this isn't an interview for a theme park. You've had one or two job interviews, and there was significantly less talk about virgins. Still, hear yourself offering a response. "If they remain unsullied, you're saying. Your Highness."

The lizard-y girl (the lizard girl?!)'s smile takes a slightly devious air as she glances over you with renewed interest. "Yes, Sir, if. You are a proper Prince, and that means you can get close to proper Princesses. It is how you got this close to me, after all. A strong, exotic prince who can win tournaments, who is unlike anything these border princesses have ever seen? I imagine you could get quite 'close' with many of them."

Is this...a dream or something, then? "And then your position is stronger?"

The girl nods primly. "Daddy's wish has always been that I take rule of the more civilized realms for him, but it is difficult with so many valid claimants to the various thrones. His plan was simply to flood the kingdoms with **** and ****." She gives a small sigh. "Daddy is such a dear, but he can be quite old-fashioned."

Are you really still playing along with this? What's up with that? "What would happen to the princesses I became 'close' with?"

She gives a dismissive wave. "Oh, you could keep them of course; any true Prince simply requires mistresses. All of that virile energy needs a shunt when matters of state cloud a Princess's days."

....okay, you're definitely just rolling with this then. Because this is all insane, and fucked up, and you really choked out a cyclops and those guys really exploded. But is sounds like this girl is suggesting you fuck a lot of other girls and then marry her, and though it's possible your judgement is a bit impaired, you don't imagine you're going to hear a better offer anywhere else. "So you and I would be...?"

Lin gives you that teasing little smile again. "You are my Champion, Sir. And perhaps, if you do your job well...perhaps you may be my Consort. It is entirely possible, Sir; entirely possible indeed." Her tail curls slowly in her lap as she sizes you up again. "I must say, you are quite on the ball. I hadn't expected to find someone who fit the bill and was clever to boot." She abruptly straightens, raising her voice. "Geas, I wish to reward my Champion. But in this scenario, I'm unsure of the proper gesture?"

The blue orb (which you guess is an actual goddamn ball of magic or something, fuck) floats down, rippling in what seems to be consideration. "For a new Champion, a token would be appropriate. A ribbon."

Lin shakes her head. "We did not bring ribbons." Her eyes glisten as she raises her delicate eyebrows at you. "May I give him a kiss?"

Geas gives a reproachful tut. "You know that you may not, Princess. Even if we allow that he is your suitor, which we certainly do not yet allow, it would be weeks before a kiss would be at all appropriate."

The girl gives a mewl of disappointment, casting you a regretful look as she softly caresses her lightly quivering tail. Goddamn, so that this is really hers isn't it? You were drawn to it before but now you can't stop stealing glances. Ugh, you'd love to....

...okay, fuck it. "Can I touch your tail?"

Lin's eyebrows shoot back up, eyes bright and tail ponderously waggling in her lap. She seems to like the idea. "Oh! You've never mentioned any rules about my tail, Geas!"

The magical nanny's voice takes on a lecturing quality. "There is no mention whatsoever of a Princess's tail across the entirety of my vast troves of knowledge. Not a single detail on the rearing of a perfect Princess has been overlooked, or I would not exist. Therefore, what a Princess does with her tail is clearly her own business."

Uh...but wasn't Geas originally programmed to instruct the princess of Avion? A human kingdom, and presumably tailless?

Either failing to reach the same conclusion or not caring, Princess Lin coquettishly slips a seat closer to you and uncurls her tail from across her shapely legs, looking quite pleased with the whole matter. You watch wide-eyed as the plush appendage wobbles indulgently on its journey, eventually settling carefully down into your lap. Oh jeez, heavier than you anticipated, and so fucking soft...

"Please be gentle," Princess Lin whispers, "my tail is very sensitive..."

Fingers trembling, you hesitate for just a moment over the girl's tail, its lush weight palpably radiating out a pleasant, inviting heat. Unable to wait any longer, you reverently lower your hands. Lin immediately lets out a luxurious hum as your disbelieving fingers sink slightly into her chubby yet deliciously pert flesh. This is possibly the closest thing to heaven you'll ever find growing out of the butt of a girl.

Lin scoots closer, leaning in just enough that you can barely feel the warmth of her sweet breath. "You could stroke it a little, if you like..."

Yes. Yes, you fucking like.

The princess sighs in undisguised delight and you have to imagine the grin you are sporting is entirely ridiculous as you slowly caress your way to the end of her wonderful extra feature. Why couldn't the girls back home, or on Earth, or whatever the fuck you used to be versus wherever the fuck you are now, have had tails? There is no way this could be any-

Your thought cuts off as Lin gets out a short, quavering gasp, your fingers coming up wet with a musky, maddening scent filling your nostrils. What the fuck? You look up at Lin, who is smiling at you with guilelessly pleased eyes. "Ah, you found my favorite part!"

You jerk your eyes down to her tail just in time to see a pair of fat, beautiful, womanly lips blossom on the upturned underbelly of her rounded tail. Fuck, even a perky little marble plumps out to sing hello to you, clear wetness trickling down across your stunned fingers. For like the twentieth time in the last five minutes you hear yourself speaking without realizing it. "You...you have a pussy on your tail?"

The girl makes an interested noise. "A pussy? Is that what it's called? Geas never had anything to say about it so I never learned; what a pretty name! Is it called a pussy because it's so nice to pet?"

"...............yes."

Lin seems pleased to have learned something new, her cheeks reddening as you almost unthinkingly draw your fingers across her dripping tail cunt again. You're one hundred percent sure you are, like, dead and in the next life, or transported somewhere, or some other freaky dire shit. But you have also decided you do not give a SINGLE fuck.

Let's roll with this shit.