Introducing Our Next Guest From The Underground!

"So? What, just....normal stuff? Like- like people?"

"Yes, Cliff. Nothing weird. Niles specifically sent us out for a reason", Rita replied flippantly.

On her other side was Flex Mentallo, who as always looked like he had walked straight out of a muscle-man kind of comic, which he basically had. Smirking, he jerked his neck and a large neon sign momentarily appeared over Cliff. It read in bright purple bulbs: "VERY MUCH NORMAL".

Cliff stopped and looked over his shoulder at the monstrosity. "THE FUCK, FLEX?"

Flex raised an eyebrow reproachfully. "Sorry. She made it easy." He smiled and it disappeared again.

Jane turned around, having taken the lead in her usual way, dressed in her dark clothes and jacket and boots. "Normal isn't exactly fucking normal for us, Rita. Just saying ,if anything weird happens, and it will-"

"She's right, it will"- Cliff, with an emphatic nod in Flex's direction-

"...no one needs to say we told you so."

They stopped in front of the town center intersection. They had already attracted some stares. They were about to attract more.

Jane turned around. "Well, I guess now we-"

Suddenly, Jane blurred a little. She became fuzzy, and then clear. In the meantime, all of the color- specifically the dark fabric and laces and buckles...blended into one human-sized beige shape.

And then Rita gasped, throwing a hand to her mouth. Flex looked away. And Cliff, having no idea what was going on, said "fuck" a few more times for good measure.

"Jane" landed on the ground feet first, all of this having passed in less than an instant.

Except it wasn't Jane. It was her body, that was true- and at this point we should probably mention that said body, fabulous as it was-

was entirely bare. Nude. Naked. Starkers, stitchless, and above all exposed.

The newcomer personality looked down at the ground and grinned ear to ear. She saw her bare feet on the pavement, and flexed her small toes around for a moment, as if savoring the ground. Weird.

Then she looked at the rest of her body- really looked at it.

Flex interrupted. "Is it her?" No one answered. "Uh....Jane, or Miranda, or um- well whoever you are, you're missing-"

The newcomer looked up, having finished examining her tummy, thighs, and actual naked boobs (with cute pink nipples and all) and looked over her shoulder, kicking up her foot in a cutesy heel pop while giggling at her buttocks. "I know! Isn't it fantastic?! Ugh...clothes are the worst, you should try it!"

She played with her hair newly long and done up in two pleated braids- which was the only adornment on her amazing body whatsoever. There was now a crowd beginning to form around the naked babe downtown.

Cliff was muttering. "Fuckfuckfuckfuckwhatthe-"

Flex tried Flexing. Suddenly, a sweater swooped in on the breeze. It landed on "Jane". And then she actually sparkled- fucking sparkled.

The sweater stood no chance as it ripped to bits and was sucked into a wormhole the size of a pin in the newcomer's hand.

"Nope! Nakey nakey all day long! I call that my Naked Song!" She smiled and threw her hands out. "Ta-da!"

Her boobs bounced and Cliff turned around. "Fuck it. I deal with super-weirdos, not super-streakers."

It was a good thing robots don't blush, because despite Cliff's response, his very human brain was very human-interested in the very naked human being before them.

"I'm not a streaker! I'm a nudist! It's very different, you know!"

Rita groaned. "J-just....what pray tell, do you call yourself?"

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Inside, Jane was frantically pestering the Signal 8, the train coach. "YOU DON'T FUCKING GET IT, DO YOU?! SHE'S GOING TO-"

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"Well, that's easy! Look at me! I'm the only one like this. Figures."

The personality in Jane's body did a bow. A very naked bow.

Then straightened, winking at Flex and Jane and Cliff's back.

"I'm Nudie Nina! And I'm happy to be outside! Oh....and naked! That's the best part!"

She ran up to Rita. "Suuuuuure you don't want to join me? hehe!"

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"AND THEN SHE'LL- OH GOD, SHE'LL"-

Outside, Rita had not joined Nina. Nina was currently running back and forth between shop windows and the group. Her bare feet slapped on the pavement, and her boobs and butt jiggled as she did nothing to stop them.

"Pleasepleaseplease! I always wanted to go downtown! I- I have so much living to do! I want to go to dinner- to the mall- ooooh I want to go to Paris- do they have many nudists in Paris-?"

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"BUTT FUCKING-"

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"NAKED! WHEEEEEEEE!"

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"ARRGHGGH! FUCK FUCK FUCK!"

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"Oh wait, I'm getting a call." Nina stopped. She put her hand dramatically up to her ear, shushing the precisely no one that was talking. Everyone had their mouth agape about the naked Nina anyways.

A man from the growing crowd approached. "Hey baby can I have your-" she waved her hand and her powers ate out a phone number shape in his jacket.

She didn't turn around. The man looked at his jacket, mystified. "Um....ok then?"

She began talking to herself. "Jane?! Sure! I can talk....it's been so long! Babe, did you listen to what I said about getting naked?"

"No? You really should- it feels so- I understand that but the boobies- oh you know I can't stand synthetics I'm- uh huh..."

She pretended to close a cell phone in her hand.

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"DON'T YOU HANG UP ON ME!"

She turned to the group again. "Ahem."

At least Flex made some effort to acknowledge her.

Rita whispered. "If you don't look at it it might go away. The person in control is me-"

Nina pouted. "Come on.....do you really want me to go away?"

Cliff almost spoke.

Then Nina ran up behind him and hugged him. "I like you, you know! I've heard all about big strong Cliff! Also...."

She looked down at her body and gestured. "I can't exactly um.....well I can't undo it!"

She turned around to Flex, winking. "OOPSIE! Haha!"

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Inside Jane was sitting on the subway with her hands in her head. "Oh god......I can't- but if I don't?"

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Nina put her hands on her naked supple hips. "So? Who's it going to be? Nudie Nina? Or Naked Jane?! haha!"