Zooey Deschannel - wants to change her image

It's your last day before the weekend, and you're read to go home. You've just finished taking store inventory, straightening up a few things and you're heading back to the register when you hear a noise.

"Ahem."

Great, you think, an impatient customer. You turn a corner and see the back of a pretty girl in a flowy dress standing at the register. Well, you think, at least it'll be a pretty impatient customer.

Unthinking you jog back to the desk to ring her out. It's a few seconds before you even glance up to see her.

"Sorry," she says, a big dumb smile on her face. "I like to be in and out when I come to a place like this. So no one sees me, you know." Her bangs fall into her big doe eyes. She smiles a polite goofy smile.

"You're..." It's Zooey Deschannel.

"I know... who I am." She says with a tease.

"Sorry" you answer. "You're the first famous person I've seen since working here... for two years"

"That's sad. 'Cause this city is nothing if not full of horny celebrities."

You smile at that. Then she lays down her purchase. A cute piece of lingerie. White and lacy with a little skirt and polka dots. You're about to ring it out when you look back up to her. "You know, you're just..."

"The cutest thing?" she answers with a bit of an eye roll. "The perfect girl-next door, hipster, adorable, dorky, something?"

"Yeah... kinda" you can't help it if it's what you were going to say.

"It's okay. I get that a lot." She grimaces. "Truth is, though I'm so sick of that image already. It's really starting to annoy me."

You grab her purchase, look back at it and go back to ringing it up. But you can't help yourself. "Yeah but...."

"Yeah but, what?"

"Nevermind." You hesitate.

"No. C'mon, tell me. You can't 'Yeah but' me and not tell me." Her doe eyes stare at you.

You hold up her lingerie. "I mean, this, this is that image. If this is your style, then you don't want to change your image that much right?"

Zooey is silent at this suggestion. She stares at you for a long time, her eyes deep, pondering.

"Did you charge me for that already?" Finally she asks, blowing her bangs out of her eyes with an upward puff from her mouth.

"No."

"Good, then you're gonna help me remake my image. Starting with what I buy at this sex shop." She gives you a big smile. And you're not sure where this is going or what exactly is going to be expected of you.

"Ummmm....."

"Sorry, too late. Plus you get to tell all your friends you help a pretty actress shop for sex stuff, right?"

"I, ummmm...." This is starting to seem strange, but Zooey's demeanor only seems more cheerful.

"Yeah, you can never tell anyone about this." She nods toward the store. "Let's go, you're helping me." And you come out from behind the counter and follow Zooey to the clothing section of the store. "Okay pick." she says, pointing at the racks upon racks of clothes.

You wonder for a moment if she's really serious and if so why you get this privilege. For a moment you want to ask why, demand an explanation. But you're not sure if it's the best idea. Still, you can't much help yourself. "I don't get why..."

"You said I need a new image." her tone is flirty and sarcastic. "I agree. I think it should be edgy and a little sexy. You work in a sex shop and like girl... at least I assume as much, so you're in the perfect position to help me. Now pick."

And you take a deep breath. Okay, you think, if that's what Zooey wants.

You look across the clothing section. Up front is the safe and standard lingerie, the kind Zooey original brought to you. Behind them are the costumes, school girls, police women, all the standards. After that come the stripper clothes, tight and semi-see through dresses. And at the very back of the room is the S&M garb. It's intentionally in the back, where only the fans know to find it. Lots of leather, collars, corsets, heels and chains.

That's it, you think. If you're going to be Zooey's image consultant you might as well go all the way. "There" you point, "the leather."

Zooey greets this idea with a smile and a look of flirty concern from her big eyes. "That's quite a change for me. We may be here for a while." And it's exactly what you want to hear.

"But first thing's first" You say, feeling like you're taking control of the situation. "We have to determine something important."

"Oh yeah? What's that?" Zooey seems genuinely unsure where you're going with this.

"Are you a dom or a sub?" You can't believe you're asking Zooey Deschanel this. But no use getting caught in the strangeness of the moment. You've got work to do. You await Zooey's answer.

She gives it with a smile.