The group responds

Joey asks, “Did you guys ever get to watch the sex tape?”

“Umm no,” I answer. “I haven’t talked to Jess since. I follow her on Instagram. I think she has two kids now.”

“You should DM her and ask for the video,” Joey says.

Monica rolls her eyes, “I had just forgotten about that skinny redhead. Who would’ve thought Chandler would tell that story to all his friends.”

“I didn’t know you two were so adventurous,” Phoebe says. “If you ever want another threesome, you can invite me. I’d love to be abused by Chandler.”

“We had a very interesting sex life…before kids,” Monica says, ignoring Phoebe comment about me.

Rachel looks appalled at my story of constantly having sex with a girl who is in a relationship with someone else. She obviously doesn’t approve of my actions. Oh well. I bet she has done some shady stuff in her past that I wouldn’t approve of.

Ross on the other hand is drooling, “I’m so jealous. Jess was so hot. I would’ve love my hand gripped into her red hair.”

Rachel sits up uncomfortably, “Your wife is sitting right next to you.”

“You’re hotter than her,” Joey says. “Your tits are like four cups bigger.”

Rachel wraps her arms around her chest, becoming very conscious of Joey’s eyes on her cleavage. “This girl doesn’t sound like a good person. She constantly cheated by sleeping with Chandler.”

“Maybe Chandler is a sex god, who no woman can resist,” Phoebe jokes. “He did fuck three in one night. Back to back to back.”

Monica grimaces, “Don’t remind me that my husband was a man-whore.”

Joey looks through the flames, “You really must be packing, buddy. Welcome to the club. Ross isn’t invited.”

“I’m packing,” Ross says. “I just don’t feel the need to tell everyone about it all the time.”

Phoebe looks around the group, smiling, “Are you guys about to have a dick measuring contest?”

Ross drains his glass, “Fuck it. I’m drunk enough to measure. What are the stakes?”

Rachel stands up, “Nope. Nope. Nope. I’m done. As soon as there is penis talk, it’s over.”

“I’ll join you,” Monica says stretching. “I’m out of the mood with Chandler bringing up Jess.” She kisses me, “Goodnight babe.”

They get up and go back into the house.

Phoebe looks around the fire at the three men, “Alright. Where were you guys? That’s right. You were arguing over who has the biggest dick. How are you going to find out?”