So there’s this disease, right…?

“Okay, back up, and give it to me again, slower.”

Sora.exe had stopped working, and needed to reboot.

Hyun-ji’s angelic face creased with worry. “Sora, this is the third time we’ve-”

“Again.”

Ya finished another beer. “Chill out, man. You’re gonna get a condition. Though not this one. It’s genetic. Celestials keep it a well-guarded secret, which is why you’ve never heard of it.”

“It is… supposed to be an affliction exclusive to infernals,” Hyun-ji admitted, glancing aside to her wife. She reached out, and Ya took her hand tightly. “A unique curse of ‘their base nature’. I was taught these hateful lies growing up. Most celestials don’t know that it occurs at the same low rate within our people.”

“Word gets out, it shows we aren’t so different. That’s big shit, and something the authorities won’t sit tight for. We’re actually not allowed to go public with this, though we wouldn’t even without the gag orders.”

A particularly ironic choice of words, given the… yeah.

I also can’t think of a more effective way to destroy the careers of a pair of lesbian idols than to come out that one of them’s going to be taking regular ‘treatments’ of semen for the rest of her natural life.

“Okay, so.” Sora used the phrase like a mantra to restart his brain from scratch. “Everyone knows infernals can get this thing, this… addiction to semen. Genetic Addiction Disorder. You’re telling me you don’t have it, Liao, despite being at least a rampaging bisexual…”

“Guilty as charged. Though I’ve been off the wagon since we got hitched!”

“... But you, Hyun-ji, a literal lesbian angel, have it.”

“The disease didn’t ask her consent,” Ya rolled her eyes. “But yeah. That’s where we're at. When we first got the diagnosis, believe me, we didn’t take it. Second opinions, backup plans, experiments, cutting-edge medical research. Cybertech and surgery. We spent a ball-load of money… only to find out that nothing but ball-loads will keep my wife healthy.”

What sheer absurdity.

The situation would have been comedic, if it wasn’t happening to his friends. Sora was having trouble seeing the sunny side on this one. His stomach did backflips with all that home-cooked food. On the other hand, shamefully, he grew stiff down there from the very lewd notions now flooding through his mind.

He couldn’t help it, okay! He was going to be respectful, of course, but just the thought of the warm, living, breathing pinup Hyun-ji, who had precisely zero interest in dick, even on girls, just... begging for it. Begging him.

She didn't want his dick, but she needed it.

His rational mind was in a panic, but Caveman Brain’s stance was firming up fast.

“... So, what are you gonna do about it?”

“I thought my wife made things clear,” Ya groaned, swiveling around on her stool, looking skyward at crooked fluorescent lights far overhead. “Really, it’s up to you what our next move is. You can refuse, no hard feelings. Promise. The government’s got a program for this stuff, a safety net.”

“They perform covert screenings of the whole celestial population across Autumn, and present a briefing to anyone with a high risk of manifesting GAD.” Hyun-ji sighed. “I was told before I even knew myself, or I’d shown any symptoms more severe than weakness and fainting.”

“The program provides ‘donors’. A steady, consistent, discrete supply, all tied to the kind of NDAs that wind you up shipped to the fucking moon, you break em.” Ya Liao ran a hand through her hair. “The kicker is, to take advantage, you sign too.”

Sora wiggled in his seat and willed his body to stay calm.

“Are we breaking the law at the moment?”

Not the first time he’d had to ask that, and it wouldn’t be the last-

“Nah, we got permission… and that wasn’t easy. To ask you to be our donor.” Ya groaned. “I mean, you’re our only hope for an actual person. A fucking sperm bank? It’s got to be relatively fresh anyhow, and that’s even more horrifying than letting some random guy so much as breathe on my wife.”

A shockingly protective streak, given they were both celebrities whose jobs, in part, entailed being ogled from as many angles, and in as many ways, as was possible for humanoid life.

Maybe in that context, the fierceness in Ya Liao’s voice wasn’t surprising at all.

“Hyun-ji, are you… sure you want this?”

“I’m sure I don’t want anything else,” She shivered, the kindness in her soft eyes hollowed out. “This is a nightmare, but at least… we both know you well. You’re the only… male in my life in any real sense.”

“I’d trust ya with my life,” Ya said. “So if I can trust any guy with my wife… yeah. It’s you, or the sperm bank. We agreed to the program in case nothing else panned out, because this really is a need. It’s constant, and it’s gonna… it’s gonna kill her if we don’t get it sorted.”

Sora shook his head. “How can such a thing even be real?”

“My kind have been asking that question for thousands of years, buddy,” Ya replied. “We never found a cure, a cause… It’s inheritable, but that’s clearly not the whole story. People thought only succubus-type infernals got it, nope. Hell, even ‘it’s just infernals’ is clearly wrong. Nobody knows a damn thing.”

“I must assume if there was any solution that did not involve debauchery,” Hyun-ji said, her voice intoned with fatalistic sorrow, “Celestial civilization would have uncovered it without delay.”

Ya sighed. “And from our end, frankly, needing to drink cum never seemed like much of a burden. I guess we never expected a lesbian could get it.”

No getting around it, they had go straight through.

More to the point, Sora had a decision to make, and a pair of women looking at him with a mixture of desperation, concern, and poorly-concealed hope. They hid it well at first, but acknowledging how much effort they’d put into finding a way around this, only to fail, brought it all home like a hammer. Forget all this stuff, this was simple.

Was he their friend, or not?

“I told you guys I’d help out any way I can, so...” Sora shrugged. “Um, how is this gonna go…?”

Ya produced a medical container, and pulled him upstairs towards his flat.

Oh.

“We’ll be right back, babe!”