Ross and Joey

I close the door to see my two best friends sitting on the couch, sharing a bowl of popcorn. Both of them turn to look at me. I've never been more aware of an erection.

Joey cheers, “Nice job! From those LOUD moans Monica was giving, you did your job as a husband.”

“Yeah dude. They were so loud, they woke me up,” adds Ross.

I couldn’t tell if they were being serious. I didn’t think she was that loud. Maybe being away from the kids really let her lose volume control. I say, “Sorry. Didn’t mean to be loud.”

“Don’t apologize,” says Joey. “Now where did you nut? Her pussy? Her face? Maybe down her throat?”

I think Ross is going to scold him for talking crass about my wife, but he adds, “Her fat tits?”

Fuck. I forgot how drunk he is. I’m double teamed. I could lie, but I’m drunk and frustrated too. I tell the truth, “I haven’t yet. She gave me blue balls and an erection that feels like it’s going to explode.”

I pull my sweatpants tight to show off the outline of my erection. Joey whistles, “Oh boy that is rough! You made the mistake of fucking her too hard. You gotta make them want more. You can’t satisfy them too early.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Ross says. “There’s been plenty of times when I couldn’t come from sex. Luckily Rachel is a trooper, and sucks me off until I come.”

I don’t know why I say it, but I just blurt out, “Why don’t you go wake her up and she can finish me off?”

Oh shit. I immediately regret it. I just made a sexual comment about his wife. He’s drunk, and he doesn’t allow any comments about his wife. He gave Joey a black eye the first time he commented how he’d like Rachel long legs resting on his shoulders.

Ross stares at me, and I prepare for the outburst. Instead of yelling and attacking me, he says, “I’ll go wake her up and ask if you really want me to.”

Fuck. Is he serious? Would we wake her up to ask her? Would she say Yes!? Or is this just a trap? Is he about to beat me for saying I’d love a blowjob from his wife?

The reward of a Rachel blowjob might be worth the risk though.