Le Chat Noir (funnel)

The Uber driver pulls up outside the small, unassuming looking French restaurant nestled on the corner, across from a parking garage packed to capacity. You make a mental note to be double thankful you didn't try to drive. Despite its exterior, Le Chat Noir is an exceptional French restaurant, and is often filled to capacity on weekends. You offer Jenna a hand as she climbs out of the car, admiring the cute way she tugs the hem of her dress to keep it from riding up too much as she rises. She flashes you a grateful smile. You note with some amusement that Jack, the clueless dickhead, does not do the same for Karen, and she glares at his back as the Uber drives away.
"This is the place?" Jack sounds dubious.
"It's one of the best spots in town. To get better you have to head into the city." Jenna says with confidence. Le Chat Noir is one of her favorite places, and she sounds like she wants to defend it.
You head in, pushing open the door to the sounds of a busy restaurant on a Saturday night. The bar is humming, with black paw prints adorning the bar-back mirror. The smell of seafood and steak commingle, and the sounds of the hubbub are interlaced with soft music. It's a good spot...and bumping.
You give your name to the maitre'd when you can get to the podium, and the young woman, in a black long sleeve and bowtie, looks determined and apologetic.
"I'm very sorry Mr. Sinclair. We are having a little problem with some bookings right now, and I don't have your table ready just yet." It's currently 6:32, 2 minutes past the reservation time.
"What the f..." Jack starts to complain, but you talk over him.
"That's fine. I understand it happens. We can wait at the bar?" you speak to the woman, but loud enough for Jack and the girls to hear you. The message is clear: this is not going to be a problem. You give the girl a smile.
"Absolutely, and I'll pass along to your waitress to offer a complimentary dessert for the table. Sorry for the inconvenience." She smiles back. She seems very grateful that you spoke up. She's probably already dealt with some assholes tonight.
"That sounds lovely, Jenny." You've met this one before. She's fairly new, but her similar name to your wife gave you all something to talk about. You look at the girls, and at Jack. "Shall we?"
Jack swallows his annoyance and heads over to the bar. Karen gives his back a venomous glare. "What the fuck is his problem today?" she says, loud enough for the hostess to do a double take at her words.
"Forget him. If he's going to be a child, let him." Jenna loops her arm with yours and gives you a warm smile. "Lead me to the bar, husband. I desire to get liquored up." she giggles.
You bring the girls to the bar, squeezing them in next to Jack and standing behind Jenna, hands resting on her bare shoulders.
"Two Ketel One tonics please." Jenna flags down the young, fit looking bartender with the goatee and friendly smile. {if JxJHotwife = 1
} You can feel her body tense as he smiles at her. Hmmmm....{endif}
You order a whisky sour over her shoulder. Jack slams his drink and orders a second.