Her secret crush!

Around the corner comes a knight in shining armor on horseback.

Hilda's heart soars at the thought of getting rescued, then immediately sinks when she realizes being found in such a dishonorable and humiliating state surely means her reputation is ruined, and that she's about to become the laughing stock of the whole kingdom.

Then, Hilda is thrown into the depths of despair when she sees coat of arms on his shield.

OH NO! NOT HIM! ANYONE BUT HIM! I CANT LET HIM SEE ME LIKE THIS! HE'LL THINK I'M SOME KIND OF SEX PERVERT!

It was Baron Fabio von Hunkington, the lord who ruled the land adjacent to Hilda's (the noble next door, if you will). The two were not on speaking terms. Not because of any bad blood, but because she had never managed to actually say anything to him whenever they were in the same room.

In fact, he was the finest specimen of man meat Hilda had ever laid eyes on. The whole reason she'd become a knight and fought in tournaments in the first place was to try to impress him, but unlike Hilda, the Baron rarely went to tournaments, and certainly never fought in them because no one would ever accept his challenges. His would-be opponents always came up with some kind of excuse, but the real reason was because Hilda always threatened a violent and gruesome end to anyone that harmed a hair on his magnificent head.

I'll simply die of shame if he sees me like this!

Hilda tried to slide along the tree to hide her naked body, but all she succeeded in doing was tightening the ropes further emphasizing (in her mind at least) the sag in her breasts as they drooped over the rope underneath them, and the size of her dreaded, paunchy belly (which, again, Hilda always blew out of proportion).

The nude woman's plight caught her fellow knight's attention, and he came to a halt in front of her.

Hilda's knees trembled, her throat grew dry, and her face was as red and hot as lava, but she couldn't will herself to look away.

The man removed his helmet, shaking his magnificent mane of hair free as the sun shined on him at just the right angle. To Hilda, the whole thing happened in slow motion, and if she had been wearing panties, they would have been soaked through.

The man studied the mincing woman before him, hand on his sword (no, not that one), and spoke in a deep, manly tone.

"Pray tell me, girl, where are your vestments, and why are you tied to yonder tree?"

Hilda practically swooned on the spot as she subconsciously rubbed her exposed thighs together...