Of course he does: he’s drunk

I say, “Let’s toast to end this wild night.” Everyone grabs their shot and throws it back.

While I’m letting out a breath of fire, Rachel asks, “What did everyone enjoy most about the night?”

Good plan. Don’t make Ross think about the shitty things Joey did. Make him think about what he liked.

Monica goes first, “I like how we lined up the men and measured them like they were livestock. It felt good objectifying them for their sexual organ.”

Rachel laughs, “Yeah no more metaphorical dick measuring. I liked that we were all so comfortable with each other. Maybe it’s because of how much we had to drink, but I didn’t mind showing off tonight.” Then she waves her hands to emphasize, “That’s something I’ve never done before.”

“I did not like finding out that I had the shortest dick in the group,” I say. “But it was thrilling showing myself to multiple women at a time. I felt like my heart so going to explode out of my chest before I dropped my pants. Then your reactions were amazing. What did you like the most, Ross?”

Ross grabs the bottle and takes another shot. He smiles and says, “I needed some more courage to tell the truth in front of my wife. I loved seeing some new titties.”

We all laugh at his response, really making sure there’s no tension. We don’t want to mess this up. He seems loose, but he also seemed pretty loose before he attacked Joey. I’m definitely not going to push to let me fuck his wife. It has to be his decision.

My wife unwraps the towel from her head. Her still wet brown hair hangs down in strands on her face. She playfully pushes it away and asks, “Be honest. Whose boobs did you like more?”

Ross smiles, “I’m a connoisseur of tits and can be very critical, but you both have very nice tits. You have a bigger size which is always good. Phoebe had such perkiness I almost thought they were fake, and she had the piercings which were a nice surprise. But your nipples put you over the top. Hers were so dark and small. Your nipples have a great areola ratio, great color and perfect size. So suckable. You have the better tits in my expert opinion.”

My wife draws a hand down her neck and starts parting her robe. “That’s so kind of you. You know a lot about tits. You guessed perfectly. My nipples loved to be sucked.”

Fuck. My wife is laying it on pretty heavily. It’s my first time seeing her give the “fuck me” eyes to anyone but me. Damn. She really wants to do this. She wants to fuck my best friend. My heart pounds in my chest at the thought of her nipples in his mouth.

Rachel tries to seal it, “I’m curious, hunny. If we continued the game, who would you have picked?” Ross looks uncomfortable like his wife is trying to trap him into a confession. She adds, “I would’ve picked Chandler. I think we would’ve had a lot of fun.”

Fuck. Ross looks at me, but it’s not the threatening look I expected. It’s more of a questioning look, wondering what is up. I try to give a subtle wink. I’m drunk. I’m sure it’s not subtle and I’m sure I look ridiculous.

Ross pours himself another shot and takes it before answering. “Okay. All truth. No judgements. We’ve all been drinking so no hard feelings later.” He looks to his wife and she nods her head in agreement. “So obviously Phoebe is very vocal about her sexuality, so we could’ve had a great time, but, I have a feeling that Monica is even more of a freak behind closed doors.”

He looks right at my wife who has her robe opened up deeply enough to show a hint of cleavage and talks directly to her, “I bet you get fucking wild. Your body looks like it could take quite the pounding. I wouldn’t have to be afraid of hurting you like I do Rachel. Her thin body is so fragile. I would really let loose with you though. I bet you like it rough.”

Fuck. My wife and him are staring into each other’s eyes. They’re posed to pounce across the table at each other. I had no clue he had so much sexual aggression for my wife.

Rachel softly asks, “Would you like to fuck her tonight?”

“Yes,” he says without hesitation, not looking away from my wife’s brown eyes.

“I’m going to fuck Chandler,” Rachel says.

He doesn’t even blink. “Whatever.” His attention is wholly consumed with my wife. My wife who currently has one tit out and is encircling a finger around her perfect nipple.

Rachel shrugs then looks at me, “Well it looks like these two are about to tear about this kitchen getting at each other. Would you like to take it to the bedroom?”