Meeting the Straw Hats Pt 5: The New Recruits

“Sanji, you’re awake!”

The chef was disorientated but the voice of Chopper let him claw back to reality. It wasn’t the first time he’d been awoken from the reindeer, but it had been a while. He didn’t quite remember why or when he’d fallen asleep…

With the familiar Chopper came an unfamiliar location. It was a red clothed medical bay, one with just him and the doctor inside, with him on the crimson bed as blood dripped into his arm from a bag. Surely the Sunny hadn’t had such a dramatic overhaul, but he could feel the oceanic waves tilt him slightly so this wasn’t back on Sabaody either. He sat up to get a good look but a light-headedness caused him to falter.

“Woah! Watch it Sanji, you lost a LOT of blood there.” Chopper warned, guiding him slowly upwards to a comfortable sitting position. “How are you feeling?”

“Kinda shitty but alive.” He admitted after catching his bearings. “Where are we? I don’t recognise this place.”

Before he could answer it the pair were interrupted by a voice from beyond the curtain. “Doctor Chopper! I hear our patient is awake!”

The little reindeer spun around in his swivel chair. “That’s right Doctor Sana! Thank you so much for letting me use your space!”

“Chopper, that’s a woman’s voice, Chopper! A hot sexy doctor right behind that curtain?!” Sanji exclaimed, imagining a plethora of attendant type fantasies.

“Ah yes, you warned me he’d be like this.” Sana laughed, still not coming through. “Tell me my patient, why did you get such a nosebleed today?”

Sanji blinked, still not remembering the actual incident that put him in this bed. “Uhh, can’t remember. It happened a little bit when I saw Nami-san. And again when Nami kissed my cheek. And again whenever I thought of Nami or Robin or any female. But that’s cause she’s so ridiculously attractive I couldn’t help it! I haven’t seen a real woman in two years!”

“I feared it as much.” She replied after a pause, “So if I came through this curtain-”

As she did, she revealed a tall dark-skinned woman, short black hair done up in a ponytail, holding a medical clipboard and adjusting her glasses. It almost looked dignified, if not for what she was wearing. She had curves in all the right places, only barely covered up by a slim pure white slingkini and a doctor’s robe. Though it perhaps wouldn’t stay white for long as Sanji once more sprayed red from his nose.

“SANJI!” Chopper cried, trying to fight the jet beam of blood with a small towel to clog the leak.

“What a medical marvel.” Sana hummed, looking up and down the boy while also holding a fresh bag of blood to the reindeer. “How does he let loose so much from just the sight of a woman?”

“I don’t know but he’s not fit to travel anywhere like this.” Chopper sighed with worry, letting the boy with a goofy grin and heart pupil rest a little longer. “It’s as if he’s allergic to women.”

“Hmm. Perhaps less an allergy, more a psychological overreaction.” Sana replied, scratching her chin in thought. “Treating this like one would a phobia may result in his body overclocking it’s limits and returning to normalcy.”

Wide reindeer eyes gawped at her, “Are you suggesting-?”

“I’ll go get some assistants and a back up bag of blood.”

The crew devolved into some mindless chatter for a while after that. Chopper had run off with Sanji a little while ago, going across the gangplank between the Sunny and the Kuja ship with the bleeding chef bundled in his arms. Everyone else seemed to know Chopper would handle it and were instead just laughing about Luffy’s understanding of his own marriage or asking more questions to Hancock.

It was nice. Being part of the group of friends with a lot of laughs. I even got to throw in a few of my own with minimal pushback, though it was hard being an outsider to the group. Something it seemed that Hancock herself was feeling as well. Looking somewhat uncomfortable being treated like this, much more used to the fawning of many than the interests of a few.

Usopp gulped, bravely stepping forward to the tall woman who had now joined his crew. “G-guess I’ll be the first to say, w-welcome to the crew Miss Ex-Warlord lady!” He stammered, as soon as the snake princess looked at him with those fierce eyes he freaked out and jumped back. “Wahh! Scary but pretty!”

He positioned himself behind Nami, who could have been annoyed that her boyfriend had called another woman pretty, if she wasn’t drooling all over herself as well.

“You can say that again,” the ginger nodded, edging a little closer to her, “Your skin is flawless, your hair shimmers in the light, and your body makes me want to lick you all over.”

My mind wanted to see that. My mind wanted to see that way too badly. “Isn’t it normal for girls on a crew to want to welcome new members with a kiss?” I blurted out before sense could stop me.

“He’s right.” Hancock agreed, crossing her arms once more in a huff. “I’ve been here for many minutes and neither of you have come over here to pay proper tribute.”

“Sorry! Sorry!” Nami rushed over in excited quickness, “Was just confused and stunned by your beauty. I’m sure you get that a lot.”

The navigator’s hands started low, taking the full opportunity to envelope the ass that so many had desired. Hancock huffed a little but allowed it, needing to bend over slightly in order to let Nami’s tongue into her mouth.

It was hhoootttt. Two paragons of softness slowly coming together to squeeze their body parts. Watching lips part ever so slightly, their two brands of lipstick mixing on each other’s mouths as they shared the embrace. Hancock started it slow, getting used to her love rival’s kiss before opening up and letting hot tongue in to explore. Nami took the opportunity with gusto. She was kissing the most beautiful woman in the world so of course she’d get as much taste of her as she could.

When they separated Nami was clearly much more in heat than Hancock, panting and practically melting on the spot, but the dark haired beauty was still affected with a blush and the thin line of spittle between the two.

“Whew, thank you…” said the navigator, smiling and gulping down the taste. “One down, forty five to go.” She giggled before taking off to the other ship.

Hancock nodded at the woman leaving, calling out. “I hope to hear that none of my subjects have escaped your mouthly inspection!”

“With that said.” Usopp suddenly cut in, he was holding a large piece of paper and a pen, “I was wondering if you could give me a list of all Kuja warrior names, just so Nami and Robin can keep track easier.”

“Certainly. Good to see someone taking this seriously.” said Hancock, “And before I forget, I must thank you as well for impregnating the ginger one.”

The sniper blinked at her, “Uhh, you’re welcome?”

After that the two began listing all the women on the other ship. Luffy and Zoro began chatting a bit, leaving me with the one person on the crew I’d known the longest.

“Thank you for reminding us about that. The news was so shocking it almost didn’t twig that they were joining our crew.” She smiled, leaning her soft body slowly into mine as she gave me heavy bedroom eyes. “Does it also mean you’re considering joining the crew? I’m sure the prospect of having all our new Kuja members so eager to smooch you would have swayed you?”

I gulped at the thought. “That is pretty tempting…”

Lost in the fantasy, perhaps Robin thought I was still debating in my head (which, I guess I am a little), but she gave me a quick peck on the cheek and sauntered off. “I’ll leave you there for now. I’m just happy our doctor turning your legs into bloody stumps hasn’t deterred you too much.” She said while walking towards her first kissing target.

I got to watch Robin go all in on the kiss with Hancock, similar to Nami. And when I say all in I mean summoning a bunch of hands to practically **** the Kuja Queen levels of all in. Instead of letting Hancock bend over carefully, Robin swept her off her feet and caught her mid fall, taking quite the gallant and manly stance with the woman in her many arms before delicately placing one on her lips. Hancock clearly wasn’t hating the attention and was much quicker to open her lips to Robin’s tongue, hot n heavy taste buds colliding as the two women explored each other. Robin even took it a step further to quietly undo the woman’s thong. I swore I saw in my peripheral vision her glance back at me but my eyes were glued to the leaking pussy of a warlord to fully check. My girl really knew how to put on a show when she wanted to.

When she was done she took the two lists of women from Usopp and went over to the Kuja ship to find her companion. Swaying her hips back and forth and leaving a panting and nearly nude Hancock to recover in peace.

I hope everyone thinks my boner is normal after that, because words were not coming out of my mouth to confirm it.

“Man, I knew this reunion would be chaotic, but this was crazy.” Usopp sighed, drooping down his shoulders in exhaustion as he walked over to us, “Though the worst seems to be-”

“Zoro!” Called a voice through the nearby wall before a pink haired bikini girl came floating through it, “I’ve finished moving in now!”

There was a beat as two ex-enemies made eye contact.

“AAAHHHH!!! **** GHOST!”

“AIIIEEEE!!! LONGNOSE WEIRDO!!!”

“Sanji. Can you hear me?”

“Huh?” Sanji blinked to life, except when he tried to open his eyes the world was still black. “Dr… Sana? What’s happening? Why can’t I see?”

“Simple precautions. We thought that we’d start small, go for touches only and only permit you vision after you’ve proven yourself.”

“P-permit me-?” He stammered in mild worry before a different word resurfaced, “Wait. Touches?!”

“In a moment.” said Sana, “First we need your blood flow to be as far away from your nose as possible, otherwise we’ll run out of S RH- blood on board and that’s not an easy type to get hold of.”

The chef gulped, knowing the risks but way too excited about the touching to think of anything else. He already was imagining what she meant by it… and was feeling a single drip of blood down his face already.

He heard a stern huff close to him. “If you’re a lost cause Mr Sanji I don’t mind performing some more barbaric methods to calm your libido. How does castration sound?”

The blood practically retreated up his nose. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine. It probably indicates my theories are correct.” She hummed, scribbling something down from what Sanji could hear. “A severe back up in the crotchal area, mixed with fear of women from some traumatic event, has created a crossing of wires so to speak. Instead of a usual response of sending blood to your hardening erection, any form of sexual stimulation has sent blood back to your brain as a sort of fight or flight mechanic. Without the need to run from a situation, nor a penis that’ll harden, your body releases the blood from your nose, mostly to keep you safe from having a stroke with that much blood in your brain.”

“Oh wow.” Sanji responded, shocked at the news but realising he probably hadn’t had a proper boner in a while now… “Does that mean… I’m broken? Will I ever be normal again?”

“That depends on the current treatment.” Sana replied, sounding almost excited. “First, I want you to remember what it felt like to harden your penis. Focus on that feeling, on the reasons you receive sexual stimulation, maybe even return to who gave you your very first sexual thought if you believe that will help. Try to find your source.”

Sanji nodded. This was deathly important to him so he was hooked on every word of the female doctor. Female…

His brain flooded his mind’s eye with every woman he’d ever seen. Every beautiful soft creature to pass his vision flashed through like a marathon of passion. From the soft smile of Princess Vivi when he delivered her a drink to that one sexy marine that had tried to kill him. From a perfume saleswoman he’d spent an entire day with to the Wanted Poster of that Jewellery Bonney he had once seen in passing. Conis, Kalifa, Shakki, Tashigi, Alvida, Miss Valentine, Caimie, Boa Hancock, Porche, Nojiko, Mozu, Kiwi, Hina, and many many many more were all there. And of course, Nami and Robin were very prevalent. Seeing these two hotties grow into even more supple Goddesses was a sight to behold.

But his original boner? Where had that been… was it those magazines he found in Patty’s cabin? No, something before that…

He was just a busboy at the time, a teenager still working on his chef skills, still getting shouted at by Zeff for trying and failing, and at the end of what felt like the longest shift of his life. He’d dropped the pile of plates he was carrying, shattering them, Sanji was so close to crying from frustration. Then he felt a kiss on his forehead. A woman had left her purse behind and returned to the table to find him like this. She told him to hang in there, that there will be days like these but there will be people out there to help you through it. It was what she did best after all, and years later Sanji would realise what her and her clothes meant by that, but as a teen he was too enamoured by the amazing view she gave off. By the slim fitting clothes and the slight nip slip she had, not to mention the ridiculous curves underneath. Maybe she liked the attention, or just liked Sanji in general, but she smiled at his gawking. The woman popped a cigarette into Sanji's mouth, the first one he’d had since he was a child imitating Zeff, and told the chef to come find her one day for a good time.

“Well would you look at that.” Sana laughed, “Looks like Luffy’s chef had it in him after all!”

“Yay!” “Woo!” “Good one Sanji!”

Reality came rushing back at the sound of more women.

“What?! Who-?!”

“They’re here to help with part two of your rehabilitation.” Sana explained, pushing down on Sanji’s chest to make him lie down again. “Just relax. Now that your blood is flowing like it should we can begin with making sure you stay better.”

Like it should? Sanji didn’t- Oh right. He had an erection again. It felt so natural, so easy to pull off that he forgot it hadn’t happened in so long. Hell was over and real life could return.

It was just when he felt hands on that erection that he realised, maybe he was in heaven. And also that his penis was out in the open air.

“WOAH!” He exclaimed, shaking his hips in reaction and making the hands stop touching him. “I-I-I’m-hands-me-them-K-K-Kuja! Is-Is this really happening?!”

Once more Sana pushed him back. “Yes. Now sit still and don’t freak out, this is part of your medicine you know.”

Sanji tried to bottle his excitement. Anyone could be touching his cock right now. Any of the dozens of beautiful Kuja women who might be completely inexperienced with men were about to try and pleasure him! Heaven did exist!

“Shall I…?” He heard a soft feminine voice by his crotch ask, a vague shuffle next to him was probably Sana nodding before the hand touched his sensitive skin again. The soft hands of a real woman were touching him right now! Sanji tried to bottle his excitement.

“Fuckk…” He hissed under his breath from just the slightest of pulling. Her fingertips were barely dancing over him, not pressing firm or applying much pressure, really just examining his dick. Perhaps for him to stay hard, or because she was a naive woman who hadn’t seen a penis before… either option was making it difficult for Sanji not to thoroughly enjoy himself. Even without sight this was an amazing moment for him.

Sana hummed in happiness, “Good boy. You’ve passed the first level of testing.” She said while scribbling more down.

“H-how many levels-?”

“Sixty seven.” She bluntly replied, “But we don’t have the time to get through all of them. If you manage ten or more I’ll hold a better opinion of you for sure.”

Sana’s dark skin in a skimpy bikini was about the last thing Sanji had seen before he went under so it was pretty fresh in his women-memory. “I definitely want to impress someone as attractive as you. Bring on as many tests as you can!”

“Sweet talking will only get you so far.” Sana replied, but Sanji could hear the smile. “Begin level two.”

Sanji really had to bottle his excitement when a kiss landed on the tip of his dick.

“Hey! We agreed I’d get to do the kissing!”

“S-Sana was looking at me so I just thought-”

“Girls, stop fighting or I’ll need to take over.”

“Sandersonia-san no! Please let us play with Luffy’s friend a little longer!”

Sanji really really realllllly had to bottle his excitement when the Kuja were FIGHTING OVER HIS DICK! He gripped the chair, grit his teeth, puffing air in and out while feeling the blood flow in his cock so fucking hard. Pushing the image of a few beautiful women bathed in his cum out his mind and much as he could.

“Two years of backup is also dangerous.” Came the soothing voice of Sana. “I assume if you are like your captain then this won’t be the last time you unload in the coming fun.” He tried to focus on her voice but it was also sending him over the edge, even more when he felt his blindfold move and come loose, “You’ve already done so well Sanji. I think if you promise to perform the other trials, we can permit you one reward. Would you like that?”

The poor chef that had been through so much could only nod.

Reality bled back into his vision. To his right, Sana: the dark skinned doctor with beautiful legs and a skimpy top smiling at him. She gently placed a hand on his dick, guiding his eyes back to his crotch where the real prize was.

Beneath Sanji were three women. A long dark haired woman, looking serious but cutely nervous. A curly red haired woman, looking more happy and playful. And a very large green haired goddess, the one Sanji recognised as Boa Hancock’s sister. All of them had their mouths open wide to receive, urging him with wanting eyes to just let go.

And so he did. Sanji had his first orgasm in two years, cum rushing out his cock and shooting into the mouths of real actual women. Ones who moaned when his sauce reached their lips, ones who leaned closer to get a better taste, and one who weren’t chasing him down to put a dress on him.

Hotness flowed through his orgasming body, Sana still pumping his dick to let as much out as he could, the cursed ache in his balls he didn't even realise he had was finally lifting. And the image of these girls all fighting over his cum would stay with him forever.

Sanji felt happy.

Finally, some actually smut again. And for dear old Sanji to prove I wasn't being mean to him forever.

Also thanks to Lawless for the suggestion about kissing new recruits. If people have suggestions for Fishman Island btw let me know, it's the one arc I'll need to reread since I just don't care for it much but if you have ideas for normalities you wanna see then shoot.