Liven up class

"Ladies, please do your best to masturbate in class without the professor realizing what you're doing. Please love masturbating in public places while trying not to get caught."

The women look at you, then look around, then look at each other before they undo their jeans and shorts and slide their hands down their underwear as Professor Cantwell comes in and starts class.

"OK, last time we talked about the rise of nationalism in southeast Europe during the early twentieth century," said Dr. Cantwell.

You take out your notebook and start doodling. You hear some muffled heavy breathing from behind you.