Everyone’s a critic

“God, this is insane! There is no way I won’t be found out! Emily’s career ends before it could even begin and I’m gonna get fired!” Thought Barbara to herself. “No, I should calm down. Take a deep breath, and don’t move.”

Several critics walked into the room, inspecting the ‘statue’. “You have to admire the level of detail on this one. You could tell me that this was a real woman and you could’ve fooled me.”

“A shame she had to ruin that by giving her overly large breasts. I mean, look at those! They are way too huge to be real! The artist must’ve had too much clay or something!”

“What did you say, you old geezer?” Barbara repressed the feeling to yell at the man. “These things are bloody natural, I’ll have you know!”

“Are we sure this is clay, thought?” Another critic spoke, adjusting her glasses. “It doesn’t look like any clay I ever saw before.”

“Oh no.”

The first critic looked around, grabbed a pen from his pocket, and moved it towards Barbara.

“John, stop that! You could break the statue!”

“You’re a few minutes to late for that.”

“I’m just going to give it a few tabs. I’m curious what’s it made off.” After a scoff from the second critic and an eye roll from the third, John tapped the stomach.

“Dammit, why am I so freaking ticklish?” Barbara used all her will power to not have a laughing fit.

“Hmmm, I’m think this is some sort of plastic. Let me see.” He moved the pen towards her breasts, moving them a bit up. “There is definitely some weight there.” Pulling the pen away, the breast bounced back down. “And there is certainly some elasticity there.”

“John, enough! You’re going to get us into trouble!”

“Yes, ‘John’, please stop!” Begged Barbara.

“Just one more thing, and then I’ll stop.” He slowly moved his pen towards her areola.

“No, please, don’t! They are incredibly sensitive! I don’t think I could remain calm if he touched them.”