Dark Lord,by unknown7

“Hohohoho!”

“Ahahahahaha!”

“So...that fucker finally had the guts, eh Marcie?”

“Indeed.”

“I'm going to rip this shithead apart! I kill him! Then I kill his dog. Then I resurrect his dog to have the dog eat his decomposing corpse!”

“As you might expect, I have some minor grievances off my own.”

“Sooo, which one of these disgusting paths are we going to read? Not that it matters much.”

“Actually, none of them, Unknown7 has submitted sigh “Dark Lord”

“WHAT!”

“Yes, Life is often disappointing.”

“Then why did you laugh!”

“Because, the only enjoyment I will get out of this is the pleasure of your mild disappointment.”

READING IN PROGRESS (BGM)

“Alright Marcie how are we going to do this? There is A LOT of shit to go trough here.”

“True, I believe I let you do the summary. You are very skilled in glossing over things.”

“Sure. So, the story starts with a Dark Elf, Farsel, leading a group of mercenaries trough a tomb in hopes of resurrecting an ancient dragon.”

“Hmm, that does feel quite familiar now, does it?”

“Well duh, no surprises there. At least this time it's not outright copy paste.”

“However, things do take a surprising turn as our protagonist drops on top of Farsel. As you might have guessed, this is yet another Isekai.”

“It's a no name loser named Fred. His parents must have hated the fucker. Who names their kid Fred?”

“I concur. It's almost as bad as Frank.”

“Farsel does try to kill Fred, but Fred uses his, or really Unknown7's signature move of punching her into the pussy.”

“Which is rather hard to do. He has to crouch down, exposing himself while performing the act. A kick would not only be faster but also more effective. Although perhaps Unkown7 does this intentionally in an attempt at absurdist humor?”

“The only absurd thing here is the assumption that Unknown7 put any thought into this.”

“I suppose. Fred, assuming this is a dream, rapes Farsel and ends up hatching the Baby Dragon who thinks of him as her daddy. Luckily the Baby Dragon is totally 18 years old, so Fred can still have sex with her.”

“Seriously, can't we just put our review of “Whore of the dragon” up? This is just a bastardized, genderbent version of it!”

“Well, as far as I can tell, this is where the similarities end. Fred enslaves Farsel and embarks on a quest to conquer the world.”

“Oh but get this, he calls himself Darth Vader and the Baby Dragon, wait for it, Daenerys.”

“Of course he does, Gina. Of course he does.”

“Anyway, if you couldn't tell by now. Fred is a bit of a piece of shit. He likes girls almost as much as he likes hurting them.”

“Maybe I have gotten numb, but I don't even feel offended anymore. He isn't as downright diabolical as the protagonist of “Bringer of Light” and he is certainly not as well written as “King Edward” Fred can most aptly be described as a miserable little gnat.”

“He may be a gnat, but a gnat with a dragon. Fred goes from country to country, punches girls in the pussy and takes over the kingdom.”

“I'd like to emphasize that this is no exaggeration on Gina's part. You better not expect any tactics, strategy or most important of all the logistics of continent wide conquest out of this one.”

“You do get a huge focus on and punishment tough. Unknown7 really loves punishing people by whipping them.”

“It's a good thing then that all the Kingdoms ruler are completely evil with no redeeming quality whatsoever.”

“Well except Marcus.”

“No, no Marcus is a pretty big scumbag as well. But he had a bad childhood, got by his sister and uncle and is also very girly looking, so he gets a pass and joins Team Fred.”

“A girly boy named Marcus that got lusted after by family members...He, you think Unkown7 ripped of the “Captive Prince” as well?”

“You know, I actually give him the benefit of the doubt on this one.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, if Unknown7 would read anything from PrinceCai his head would explode from all the femdom.”

“Fair point. So on with the story, at this point Fred has conquered about 4 or 5 kingdoms, it's hard to keep track of, but Farsel releases yet another dragon that turns on her.”

“She really doesn't have the best track record with dragons.”

“And this new dragon isn't some Baby girl, but an adult male, who quickly starts conquering the shit out of Fred's kingdom, which forces Fred to have a bit of an identity crisis.”

“He actually comes to the surprisingly self aware realization that this is all just a power fantasy based on his own insecurities.”

“I did not expect this, I give him that.”

“Oh, curb your enthusiasm. It was still very clumsily done and barely counts as character development.”

“Fred does seem to get over it fairly easy. A lot of girls love him after all and he is maybe the bad guy, but he isn't a bad guy and all that.”

“And this is where the story stands as of now.”

“Soo, we are done? I don't think we need to ask the masturbation question.”

“It would surprise me if anyone could masturbate to this. Actually, I offer our dear listeners a challenge. Try masturbating to “Dark Lord” and report back if successful. If you do I will draw a nude portrait of Gina.”

“WHAT!”

“Relax, nobody is going to succeed anyways.”

“Haaa, I guess I have to ask, do you have anything good to say about this?”

“Before that, let me ask you a question, Gina. Are you familiar with Tails gets trolled?”

“You know the answer to that.”

“It's a webcomic featuring characters from Sonic the Hedgehog, Super Mario Bros and all kinds of other pop cultural icons. It gained a decent amount of notoriety in the fandom.”

“Ok, where are you going with this?”

“Basically, “Tails gets trolled” falls in the “so bad it's good category.” The first few chapters are very entertaining.”

“I see.”

“Dark Lord is quite similar to that. There is a certain charm to it's poor storytelling and haphazardly put together plot. It's also a very easy read. We breezed trough these 80+ chapters.”

“Well, I can agree on that at least.”

“There is however, one big pitfall that Tgt fell in as well, and that is that these types of stories tend to overstay there welcome.”

“So, basically there are only so many girls Fred can punch into the pussy before the joke gets stale.”

“Exactly, Unknown7 is very much a quantity over quality guy. He started writing for Cursed Punishment about two months ago and at this point its no exaggeration to say that about half of the 417 chapters on it are from him.”

“Don't remind me, ugh.”

“Because of this, he has the tendency to repeat a lot of stuff, eventually all of it just ends up being a blur and that's when its no longer “so bad it's good” but simply bad.”

“Wow, it took you a long time to say that this shit is shit.”

“Well, that's because when all is said and done, this was not as bad as I expected it to be.”

“Really?”

“Keep in mind, I got into it with very low expectations. Surpassing them is not that big of an accomplishment.”

“So what did you like?”

“As clumsy as the whole narrative was, I could see some glimmer of potential in it. Some jokes landed and every so often there is just a hint of self awareness present. If Unkown7 stops churning out these chapters like he is getting paid for it, gets rid of his obsessive punishment by whipping fetish and stops plagiarizing other authors he might actually produce something worthwhile to read eventually.”

“Are you serious?”

“No, but I wanted to end this on a positive note.”

“Well, I can get behind this, the ending part, not the positive. So in that regard, peace out!”