Conversation on the Plane

Ross joined us for breakfast that next morning. He looked exhausted. Nobody talked about the night before or any of the shenanigans that went on after dinner. They just acted like we had a regular all-inclusive Caribbean vacation.

Ross and I were cordial. We talked to each other but didn’t say much. Ross did try to apologize for how drunk he had gotten the other night. He said it was because he got jealous of the other men.

I waited until we were on the plane back to tell Ross my thoughts. I said, “Something is wrong with our relationship that we agreed to do this, and then participated in it. I know we were stressed but this was not a healthy way of dealing with it. I don’t know what got into me that I had sex with the group without you. I regret it and feel so guilty. But I only did it because something is not right with us. I think we need to take some time to be apart.”

I hoped that since we were in a crowded plane he wouldn’t blow up and make a scene. He just ordered two airplane bottles of whiskey and then went to sleep in his seat.

When we got home, I backed another large back of luggage. I left and stayed with my younger sister. She promised not to tell anyone about this. I was a mess.

We were only married a year and we were already separated. I did know what to do. I regretted all the actions I took on that trip. I couldn’t believe that was the type of person I was. There was so much I shouldn’t have done. I couldn’t put it all on Ross’s drinking.