Chandler got

You might not remember the night, but we all went out together and you definitely got something slipped in your drink. You were not acting right at all. You were slurring and stumbling after barely anything to drink. Monica and I were really worried about you.

My place was closer, so I took you and put you in my bed. You were delirious. You kept asking, “Are you guys gonna fuck? I think you guys should fuck. If you fuck my girl, I get to fuck your girl. I’m definitely getting the better end of the deal, because your girls are so fucking hot. I bet you’re going to marry such a bad bitch, and if you fuck Monica then I’ll get to fuck her, so please just go have sex already.”

It was so weird. Monica didn’t like you talking like that. We left you alone in the bedroom. We hung out in the living room and shared a bottle of wine. We had a really nice time. We had never been one-on-one before. It was like a date. We connected really well.

I was a perfect gentleman. Monica was the one who turned the conversation. “I’m so annoyed. I was really craving sex tonight, and Chandler had to go and get roofied.”

“You can rub one out in the bathroom,” I suggested.

“Eww,” she said and playfully slapped me on the arm. Then she kept her hand touching my arm. She said, “Do you think that saying is true: Drunk words are sober thoughts?”

I knew she was talking about Chandler. I nodded, “There’s probably some true. I know he’s jealous of the women I date. I don’t know why, because you’re way hotter than most of them.”

“No way! I’m fat. You like girls that look like models. I’ve seen your timeline.”

“Your curves are so sexy. Don’t sell yourself short,” I couldn’t believe I was trying to convince Monica that I was attracted to her.

Her hand slipped from my arm down to the top of my thigh. “I wouldn’t have a problem with that deal if you don’t. We can fuck as much as we want, and Chandler can fuck your girlfriend whenever you get one.”

I knew my best friend was **** and delirious, but this beautiful girl in front of me wasn’t. I was never a guy to turn down a willing girl.

“Deal.”