A Walk in the dark Forest

Chapter 6

"Okay, go ahead," you say a few minutes later. The two of you walk side by side along a secluded path that meanders through a forest next to a stream that borders the city in which you live. Nobody else comes here and your siblings and you use the remote part of the forest as a retreat for the very difficult conversations.

Here Megan told you about the difficulties in her last relationship and Millie just cried in your arms a few hundred meters away after the experiences with her boyfriend. You too experienced beautiful and intense moments with Megan here and she helped you with your own difficulties.

Just that Megan let you both be here says a lot about her state of mind. So it doesn't help when she says halfheartedly: "Everything is okay."

"No it's not my stubborn little Wombat. I can see that with my eyes closed. I see you dueling with mum almost every morning. And I also see that you are suffering from the condition of your sister.” You prefer to start with something that you are sure of and then rebuild her confidence again. "But that makes you a good person. You care about the people you like and don't let that stop you from doing what you think is right. ”

"Oh, so that’s what you notice?" Megan suddenly snorts. You stop for a heartbeat and look at her in amazement. But this is not about you. So you catch up before your sister can stop.

"Yes. Because I know what a great person you are. But please tell me what I don't see. I can't stand the thought that I'm missing something that hurts you.” Again, Megan snorts and shakes her head, her ponytail stroking her shoulder blades.

"There are things even you can't fix Finn." Okay, that hits you where you live. Not just the statement as such, but also the pitch in which it is made. You look at Megan in silence. Now it's her turn to talk. "I'm not as great as you think," she says, looking down at the ground. "And not always such a good sister." She is silent again.

"Why do you think that?"

"Because..." she breathes desperately. "Because I... you and..." She breaks off again, but you now know in which direction the conversation is going.

"Me and Millie? Is it about her staying with me at night?” you ask quietly and actually it's not a question.

"What happened to Millie is bad, I know. No question. And if you hadn't thrashed this wimp, I would have done it. But... But everything has changed since then."

You slow down your walking pace and you look at Megan steadily from the side, while she alternately looks at the ground and the sky. In between, she looks to the side. Everywhere just not in your eyes.

"Do not get me wrong. What you do for Millie is wonderful. She can count herself lucky to have such a great big brother. But...“ Again she breaks off.

"But you feel... neglected." She nods and a slight sniff makes your blood freeze. These moments when you realize that you are part of the problem are hard to bear. But that also means you can be part of the solution.

"When my boyfriend left me, only you were there. Sure, it wasn't as bad as my sister’s story, but our whole family just looks after her. If you weren't, I would have to go through all of this on my own.” You remember the conversations with Megan and how she talked about her boyfriend. You would never have thought that experience could hit her like this. That makes you angry with yourself. Maybe you really didn't equate Megan with Millie...

"But you're not alone Megan. I am always there for you. Every second. You know that."

"Yes I know. But sometimes that's so hard.” Okay, now she said it a second time. Don't jump on it! Fight!

"What's so difficult?" Fuck!

• Yea, everything today is difficult. But not giving this chapter a like. Giving this chapter a like is easy. Trust me.