The Cosmic Cloud

"You could not live with your failure. And where did that lead you? Back to me."
Click
"...Bottom of the fourth, we're tied at three apiece."
Click
"This is CNN Breakin-"
Click
"It's okay: I'm a leaf on the wind!!"
"What does that even mean?!"
Click

Frustrated, Carl threw his TV remote at the couch cushion next to him. What year was it, that he could be browsing through the channels and still not find something to watch?! He should have smashed the cable box ages ago, and switched to streaming like his friends. Nothing he could do about it, though, given his current state of employment and finance; the young man wasn't exactly swimming in extra cash to drop on the ol' Disney+ and whatnot. So there he was, just...channel-surfing. A heavy sigh escaped his lips before he rose from the couch, wandering over to the refrigerator. There wasn't much excitement to be found there, either. Left-over Chinese food, a couple bottles of soda, various condiments with nothing to put them on...the life of a struggling bachelor sure was fun, wasn't it? Carl made sure the door slammed as he walked away from the fridge. No food, nothing to entertain him; something interesting needed to happen and fast, or he would surely explode from sheer boredom as his body desperately attempted to liven up the whole "living" experience.

On his way back to the couch, Carl spotted Evelyn by the window, just...living the dream. Soaking in the sunshine, full of color and contentment. Sure, Evelyn was just a plant given to him by his ex-girlfriend, but damn it if he wasn't just a bit jealous of her life at that moment. Carl took a minute to water her before returning to his spot: just because his ex was gone didn't mean he could not continue taking care of her parting gift to him. Feeling slightly better - if only for a fleeting moment - he returned to the couch and sped through the channels another time...before abruptly stopping. For whatever reason, something in his monkey brain told him to stop there. His eyes went wide as Carl realized what he was looking at.

"...suggesting that NASA had known about this for weeks, and did not pass the information along to the public to avoid creating a panic. Whether or not that's true remains to be seen, but as of right now, panic is exactly what we're getting. Reporting from Houston, I'm Steven Updike."
"Thank you, Steven. If you're only just now joining us, reports from a few minutes ago show the Earth is on a collision course with a gigantic cloud of material in space, the likes of which is simply too big to seemingly do anything about it. What this cloud will do to the planet is completely unknown, and we are now learning of NASA's request for a global lockdown to keep people safe from being subjected to the potential radiation and debris. Everyone should race inside the nearest building, close the windows and curtains, and wait this out as best-"

Carl didn't let him finish as he bolted to the window, nearly knocking over Evelyn in the process. He opened the window, and poked his head out; from his position on the third floor, he could see two things about the report were clearly true. "The cloud" was nearly here, as the sky had already begun to turn a purplish-green, and people were obviously in an agitated state below him, grabbing anything that wasn't nailed down and running about. Anxiety began to creep into the young man: he had no food, for one thing, and he was supposed to hunker down for an unknown amount of time? The boredom would surely kill him, then, if the starvation didn't get to him first!

It was at this moment that a little thought occurred to Carl: what if he left the window open, and just...let the cloud in? He paced back and forth, processing this preposterous idea as it grew in his mind. What's the worse it could do to him?

Maybe it would give him superpowers!
It could make him trip out, give him the ride of his life!
...it could also give him cancer.
......or, like, nine cancers.
.........or turn him into a mutant.

As his train of thought turned in an increasingly negative direction, Carl realized too late that his pacing had led him away from the window. The window that was still open.

Carl could only turned his back and reflexively cover his face as a bombardment of radiation, proteins, and dark energy filled the room.