Tina Date 3, Part 6: Talking Swords and Shopping

Tina

Harper loves me? When did that happen? How did that happen? Is she going to be mad at me for not loving her back quite yet? Tina’s mind is racing as they head back to the table. Awaiting them is dinner. Daphne has already scooped some green mashed goo onto Harper’s plate and is devouring some fried fish. Harper’s steak looks good. And the Portia Hatter special is divine. A mountain of ice cream, just like Portia got on her birthday in the first movie. Tina sits and starts to dig in, losing her train of thought. Mmmmm... ice cream!

Harper gives Daphne a look. “Did you at least try the mushy peas?”

“But Beloved, green things are poison.”

“Try it first.”

Daphne makes a face as the peas are scooped back on her plate. She gets the tiniest bit of peas on a spoon and sticks it in her mouth. It looks like Daphne doesn’t like it, but she at least swallows. “There, tried. Gross. Ready for some business? Anyway, we can have some privacy?”

The waitress is still standing there; in a bit of a huff, she notes, “Well, I can always walk away.”

“Oh, no, sorry, not privacy from you, ma’am. Privacy from the show.”

Why would Daph want privacy? Harper takes a bite of steak, then points out, “Well, someone does have a temporary pocket dimension spell. Hint, hint.”

Oh, really? Ah, Tina Hut! Tina pulls out her spellbook and starts the ritual between bites of ice cream. 11 minutes later, a shimmering, pink bubble surrounds the table. Ooooh, this is cool! I can see out the bubble, but they can’t see us! And I can control the lighting. This is a cool spell!

“Ok, Harper, you’re right! I like this spell. I’m casting one more.”

The waitress leaves the bubble. Daphne pops Harper’s sword on of her inventory as Tina cast Zone of Truth. A brief thought passes through Tina’s head: 4 individuals chose to fail resisting the spell.

“Okay, test time! Harper, Daphne, say something embarrassing!”

“Not exactly how the spell works. While everything we say must be truth, the spell doesn’t compel speech. To answer the test, I was totally checking out your ass while you worked on your make-up in the bathroom. Daph, what did you want to talk about?” Tina blushes. Maybe asking for that was a mistake.

“Oh, you sure you don’t want me to say something embarrassing?”

“I’m pretty sure, unless your embarrassing thing won’t hurt anyone’s feelings, including yours.”

“Ok, thanks. Now, I’ll let her introduce herself.” Daphne then starts tapping the sword hilt while speaking in the pretty gibberish. Did Daph go crazy? Or crazier?

The sword suddenly floating breaks that notion in a hurry. Tina hears pretty gibberish spoken in her head from a pretty, logy-sounding voice. She wishes she can understand it. Suddenly, Harper interrupts, “Hey, Tercanonehtar, do you know English? Not all of us speak Elvish.”

The pretty voice speaks, this time understandably, “What is English, Tari Tyalangan? I can speak Common for the hoppalong, if you desire.”

“English is what we call Common. Sorry for interrupting. Would you begin again?”

“Very well, but,” the sword(?) yawns(?), “I am very sleepy. Greetings Tari Tyalangan, I am Tercanonehtar, your faithful servant. Liltatari has had me forged for the express purpose of assisting you in your quest. I am sorry for not reaching out, but Liltatari gave me the sentient magic item’s equivalent of narcolepsy to keep you safe. My stray thoughts may draw unwanted attention to you. Now that you know my name, you should understand what you need to do to make me stronger. May I fall back into my dreamless sleep now?”

“You may. Thank you, Tercanonehtar. That was most helpful.”

The sword slowly drifts down to the table and Daphne pockets it back into her inventory.

“Um, cutie, I didn’t understand some of that. The T words and Liltatari? Did I even pronounce that right?”

“Sorry. Tercanonehtar kept the proper names in Elvish. Tari Tyalangan would translate to Queen Harper, which is slightly presumptuous, given my adoptive mother is still alive, as far as I know, but not worth correcting. Liltatari is elvish for Queen of the Dance, a reference to Eilistraee. Should I translate the sword’s name, Daph?”

“Depends on how much you trust Tina to keep a secret, Beloved. As much as I like her, I would vote no. Sorry, Tina. Truth zone.”

“If the staff gets even a whiff of this, it puts us all in danger, Tina. You would not be allowed to even think about it when this bubble drops. Can I trust you, love? I mean, I really want to, but I’m hesitating. And it’s not just you. I think the only one’s I truly trust to keep this in would be Daph and Scarlet. So...”

“I wanna know.”

Harper sighs, then scoots around the table to lean right into Tina’s ear. With the barest whisper, she answers, “Weirdly, Elvish never quite added words for new topics of discussion due to technological advances. Elves are very stuck in their ways. Tercanonehtar is the closest Eilistraee could get to what she intends for me to do with my sword. Tercanonehtar translates to Herald-slayer. Host slayer. I am to kill Beckie and, potentially, other irredeemably evil Hosts. That is why the sword leveled-up. Eilistraee used me to kill that fox guy. The sword got stronger as a result. You see why...”

“Got it, cutie. I regret asking. You’ll be okay, right?”

Harper gives a little kiss on Tina’s ear, then leans back. She answers, “I do have a cute little bunny in my corner that will hopefully be strong enough to bring me back from the dead by the end of the round, don’t I? I’ll be alright. Should we finish dinner now? Your ice cream is melting.”

Scarlet

This is bad. Mattie just started turning blue and Josie is down jilling off. We need to end this quickly.

Scarlet notices Skye is keeping her foe engaged from the corner of her eye. So, a forward flip kick to the oread’s enemy’s chin and 2 more quick hammerkicks to the shoulders and that is another frog down. Josie’s still fighting her incoming orgasm, but she’ll not last long the way she is already howling like a she-wolf in heat. Aelene’s reflection keeps the green-skin engaged just long enough to have it dissipate from a single bite.

Then the fight just got a lot more complicated as the blue skinned Mattie rises up and charges at Aelene. The high elf is able to deflect one of the claw swipes, but the other lands. Aelene grunt, flexing her bicep to keep the tadpole thing from entering her.

It’s time to Scarlet to embrace her oread nature. She throws a quick blast of fire at Skye’s foe, then, in Ignan, bellows, “<Hey, fuck-face! How ‘bout you try me on for size?>” at the green-skinned frog. Maybe killing it will free Mattie and Josie? The frog charges, magically compelled to duel, only getting a taste of pole from her bite and delivering not even a scratch from her less developed claws.

Josie: +16 XP (Killed 3 Level 7 Monsters, x0.7 penalty [over-leveled] and 1 Level 8 Monster, x0.8 penalty [over-leveled], x0.8 penalty for both [party size])

Aelene delivers a 5-hit combo on the blue astral elf that looks less effective than it should. Skye looks like she drops her foe. Okay. Plan’s gonna be to keep this frog bitch stun-locked til she drops. First kick dazes the frog, second kick actually stuns, flurry of blows to speed this fight along.

Shit. Missed Josie turning blue. Scarlet curses to herself as the wolf-frog-girl-thing lunges at Skye, claws already dripping slime. Skye doesn’t look great after Josie’s combo. Aelene and Mattie keep fighting. Skye starts singing in Elvish, wind whipping around her like when Harper casts one of her spells; the drow blasts past Josie and thrust straight through the lower spine of the green-skinned frog thing, effectively slicing it in two. Skye keeps moving past Scarlet. Seeing neither of them returning to normal, the oread gets an idea. Maybe my Pulse of Pleasure can cure Josie? I mean, it can now remove diseases. She charges a pulse, waiting for Josie to rush by. Unfortunately for all three of them, Scarlet whiffs; overextended, Scarlet hits the floor in time to see Skye ripped to pieces.

Skye: +32 XP (Killed 4 Level 7 Monsters, x0.875 penalty [over-leveled] and 2 Level 8 Monsters, x0.8 penalty for both [party size])

Josie: +6 XP (Downed 1 Level 8 Player, x0.8 penalty [over-leveled])

2 more shots. Gotta make them count. The Pulse of Pleasure lands this time, sealing the wound Scarlet makes as she rips the tadpole out of her wolf-girlfriend. Josie falls, already turning back to her usual self. Scarlet gets ready to spend her last Ki to fix Mattie, only to see Aelene cut the astral elf down, panting from exertion.

Aelene: +35 XP ((Killed 4 Level 7 Monsters and 2 Level 8 Monster, x0.8 penalty for both [party size])

Aelene: +5 XP (Downed 1 Level 6 Player, x0.857 penalty [over-leveled])

Scarlet: +25 XP (Killed 4 Level 7 Monsters, x0.7 penalty [over-leveled] and 2 Level 8 Monster, x0.8 penalty [over-leveled], x0.8 penalty for both [party size])

Scarlet: +5 XP (Downed 1 Level 10 player, x0.5 penalty [neutralized, not downed])

Aelene looks exhausted as she surveys the scene. She doesn’t truly freak out until her submission trigger hits her, seeing Skye’s corpse laying on the floor.

“MISTRESS!!!!!!!!!!”

Harper

“While watching you two try on lingerie is fun, why am I here? It’s not like I can wear anything here.” I get that my infinite clothing wardrobe is super useful but having 40% of what I wear coming from it makes this not great.

Tina, in a lovely pink corseted teddy, pops out of a changing room to say, “’Cause clothes shopping is a fun date activity and we got invited to a party that we can’t go back to change for.”

The Bunny Hutch girls are throwing a Sexy Succubus Slutty Summer Sleepover and Tina insists that none of us have properly sexy sleepwear. And I thought the set I was wearing before having to put on that uniform was pretty cute.

Daphne steps out of her changing room and Harper wolf whistles. She has a cute strappy cupless bra and a matching thong. The straps appear to look like vibrant green seaweed. There are some pearl accents on the hip and shoulder straps. “I suppose you approve, Beloved.”

Harper wraps her arms around Daphne’s waist. “I certainly do, Beloved. The problem is that you have to impress the bunny.”

Said bunny pokes her head out of her changing room. “Well, Daph, show it off.” Harper slowly spins Daphne around, who shakes her breasts and butt when they would be in Tina’s view. “Acceptable. What do you think about this, Harper?” Tina then steps out of the booth; she has a dark red bustier with a built in garter and white diamond accents. Her g-string barely covers her Bunny Hutch. Fishnet stockings and Tina’s sorceress heels finish the look.

“Wow.”

Tina presses herself into the sea elf. “It’s too bad we can’t get you something. I don’t want my girlfriend to look embarrassing at the party.”

“Having such perfectly wrapped arm candy won’t make up for it?”

Tina starts to try to pay, only for Daphne to hop up and pull out her phone. “Hey, Tina, I got this. Paying you back for letting me tag along.”

“I mean, you were a pretty good Himana... But okay!”

Daphne: -50 BP

Two lovely lingerie clad ladies on Harper’s arms, they head to the awaiting carriage. Prudence opens the trunk, revealing Harper’s wardrobe. Tina gets super excited and starts trying to assemble a “super sexy” set. Prudence pulls Harper aside. “Mistress, has Ms. Daphne solved a mystery?”

“I say she has. Rather not talk about it with you, though. No offense.”

“None taken. The producer is okay with you hiding things. Now, Ms. Campbell wishes to dress you.”

Tina yanks Harper over as Prudence does the same to Daphne. Tina pockets all of Harper’s clothes and replaces them with a mostly translucent dark blue babydoll with a matching hipster panties. “There,” the bonny bunny declares, “that is sexy sleepwear for a slumber party.”

Daphne hops over. “I got a cool new spell, Beloved! Wanna see it in action?”

Tina is already dragging both of them into the carriage. “Not right now, Daph! We got a party to get to! I’ve never been to a college party before! C’mon!”

Josie

“Sorry, Aelene. I wasn’t myself.”

Aelene, lightly sniffing still (but thankfully done bawling over Skye), replies, “It’s okay. This one understands you were not yourself, good luchtoni Josie. If you truly say that Mistress Skye is resting, safe and sound, in the Hotel, this one believes you. This one is sorry for holding back. This one should have used this one’s vorpal weapon. Perhaps if this one did, this one would not have failed Mistress Skye.”

“Aelene, don’t blame yourself,” Scarlet offers, “We didn’t know about the green ones. Man, those bites were no joke. Found a hole behind the altar with some tadpoles fucking the walls to climb up. Fried the ones coming up. The level chest was also back there. It’s getting pretty late. I think we should grab the loot box and call it a night?”

So, that’s what Josie does. She hefts the box up and the three exit. Aelene respectfully crawls over to Skye and starts to brush her hair. Scarlet spends her last Ki to jolt Mattie awake.

“Fuuuuuuuuck, that was an amazing orgasm! It felt like it lasted for hours!”

Fuck. Stars is right.

“Here, you’re the closest thing we have to a nerd caster right now. Time to do the nerd duty.”

“Yeah, yeah. Teeth showed me how. I’ll get on it.”

By the time Mattie finished nerd duty, Skye is awake and getting a lovely massage from Aelene (who was apologizing to Skye so profusely the drow is blushing). The astral elf states, “So, we have a Major XP Potion, Bracers of Defense, Hosiery of the Phoenix, and a box labeled ‘Alchemical Materials for the Budding Pervert’. So, someone is getting hosed and someone is getting nothing. Who wants what?”

“This one deserves nothing, for this one failed her mistress. Mistress Skye, you should take the bracers. They will help you survive and look so pretty on your forearms.”

“Aelene, if you want something it’s okay. I’m fine not taking anything.”

Josie grabs the box of alchemical goodies. “I’m the alchemist of the harem. I’ll see what I can do with this stuff. What’s the magic stuff do?”

“I guess that would help, huh? The hose lets the wearer spend 4 ki to cast Fireball at base level. The bracers give +1 armor for folks without armor or shield. The potion gives 10 XP to someone Level 10 or under.”

Scarlet sighs, “Looks like the hose is for me, then. I wasn’t really using the magic in the hosiery I’m wearing anymore anyways. Skye, neither Aelene nor Mattie can use the bracers; I think it would be good for you to wear them. That leaves the potion. Between the two of you, who’s got the most need for XP? That seems fair.”

Mattie sighs, “Well, since I got knocked out of the fight so early, I only got 17 XP in the bank. Only enough for 1 level.”

“And, between last night and today, this one has over 60 XP needing to be applied. Even if this one thought this one deserved a reward, it would be blatantly unfair for this one to deny the good elf Mattie some easy XP. Take it.”

With a loud glug, Mattie chugs the potion. “Ugh, tastes like stale paper.”

Mattie: +10 XP

“How do you know what old paper tastes like?”

“Ever fought against a knowledge elemental? Had to deal with a power-hungry librarian in Alexandria once. They attack with the power of textbooks.” Mattie shivers at the memory.