School was uneventful. I hung out with Ellie, who was my best female friend, and Emily and her boyfriend. Sometimes I wonder what she sees in him.
"I think they're lovely together," Ellie says.
"I'm still salty," I say. I usually won't admit something like this to anybody else, but Ellie was about the purest and most accepting person I know. I still wonder if she isn't a fairy.
"You'll find your love, I know you will!"
When I reached home, Shelly was sitting on the couch. That couch, watching the same movie on Netflix in the dream. But instead of the movie, she eyes me as I set my bag down and sit on the couch next to her, taking off my socks. She munches on her popcorn. I could see that she's wearing the exact same camisole, but with a bra underneath, though.
"You really don't have a crush?" she says.
This caught me off guard, but I manage to keep calm and say, "no." I don't know why I'm lying, especially when she's making the effort to break the ice again.
"Well, you should get one," Shelly says. Her tone is big-sisterly - assertive, but caring. "Do you know how to talk to girls? I can teach you, if you want."
"Um, why are we talking about this again?" I say. "Never seen you so interested in my love life."
"No reason. I just don't get how you're still a vir - gin," she chokes on the last word, but acts like that's what she wanted to say all along. Her eyes are fixed on the movie now. "I mean, we have mom's and dad's genes, you know," she explains.
"It's easier for you, as a girl."
She raises an eyebrow.
Before long, it's night again. As I lie down, I think about last night's dream and what Shelly said. A tinge of excitement had been burning inside me. I want her, but it's wrong. I think she is probably thinking the same thing too. It's wrong.
It's wrong.
But what if we do it in a dream?
NO. Snap out of it, John. She's your sister.
But still, it can't hurt to try. It can't hurt to fantasize.
Outright sex with her is wrong. But I still have some ideas.
Comments