TF Vote Results

Alan looked around.

Ariadne and Tess both had distant expressions, their attention fixed somewhere Alan could not see. They were working together on a temporal twist that would have revealed a lot of strategic information about Atlas to anyone capable of witnessing it.

Only Skynet could see what they were doing.

Skynet did not give a fuck about it.

“What on Earth...” Tess frowned.

“I told you the softened version wouldn’t win,” Skynet said.

Tess blinked with Alan’s face.

Skynet sighed. “You misread the pattern. Adding a member to the harem is a sure thing. Putting a harem member’s children in a creepy daycare is not. You put it against a fucking breast enhancement, Tess.”

“Okay.” Tess looked genuinely rattled. “So, um, you gonna veto anything?”

“Wait,” Laurel said. “Shouldn’t I have gotten a shot at replacing something? I forgot, but my TF says I can replace an option.”

“You should have said something if you wanted to do that,” Tess said, smirking.

Laurel gave her son’s doppelganger the finger.

“Okay.” Tess clapped Alan-mimic hands together. “Starting from the popularity bottom. The Audience voted overwhelmingly for Bisexual Ninja Cyborg Catgirl.”

She waved theatrically at Joan.

“No good options there,” Joan said, shaking both heads.

“Next, we have Christian. Second least popular, after starting the game second most popular. A tragic fall. She won Huntress.”

“Oh.” Christian shrugged. “Okay.”

Tess snapped her fingers.

Chloe screamed.

Everyone went silent.

“You fucking bitch!” Chloe shouted at Tess.

Tess smiled with Alan’s face.

“Chloe, what the fuck?” Alan asked.

“Fuck, Alan.” Chloe’s voice shook with rage and panic. “Fucking veto Christian’s TF. Trust me. Do not let her own that one. I’ll explain later.”

“That was rude, but I’ll allow it,” Tess said.

Her hand clenched.

Chloe went silent.

“Chloe tied in popularity with Ariadne,” Tess continued brightly, “and Invisible Pervert won.”

Chloe glared at her.

Tess gestured to Ariadne.

“It seems my betrothed has won a few hearts. Once More, With Feeling has won, and Ariadne remains the host of this season. I take full credit.”

“Alan,” Ariadne said, looking slightly worried. “Listen to Chloe.”

Tess gestured, and Natalia was allowed to speak.

“What exactly does it mean, the pocket-dimension option failing?”

“Without votes for it, or a veto, your children remain on Earth,” Tess said. “Right now, they think you’re shooting a movie somewhere unpleasant. Their father is not involved. The risks of a pocket dimension managed by Harem Hotel are real, but so are the risks of remaining on your version of Earth.”

Tess looked embarrassed.

“I was gonna hand them off to Grandma E and Jessie to learn necromancy, like normal kids.”

Natalia stared at her.

“Oh,” Tess added, “and D+ won.”

“What?” Natalia barely reacted as her chest expanded. “You were going to have them learn necromancy?”

“I’ve taught necromancy to children,” Skynet said. “If I had learned it as a kid, things would have gone better. I approved it.”

“I am sorry, but no.” Natalia scowled. “That sounds awful.”

“I was trying to be nice,” Tess muttered.

“That is part of what concerns me,” Natalia said.

“Anyway,” Tess said, trying to recover, “Natalia tied with Laurel, which I did not expect. So those are the transformation results. Skynet, Alan, any vetoes?”

“Um, yeah,” Alan said. “I’m listening to Chloe. Huntress.”

He paused.

“The other two were the super creepy ones.”

Christian turned toward him.

“No cheating and asking her about it,” Tess said, wagging a finger.

Alan frowned, his eyes sliding away whenever he tried to look directly at either twin. The magic did not stop him from thinking, but it clearly wanted to stop him from reading their faces.

“So Chloe was worried about Huntress,” Alan said slowly, “but not the love-charm fluid or the one that makes everyone think the twins are already having sex.”

Christian went still.

Alan swallowed.

“Gotta be the creepy twin one. I don’t trust the **** magic not to have some horrible secret cost.”

Tess’s smile widened.

“Alan Wayne vetoes Huntress and replaces it with Over the Bus.”

Chloe’s silent expression changed in a way Alan did not know how to read.

The air seemed to bend around Christian and Chloe for a moment.

Then nothing obvious happened.

Alan frowned.

“Wait. Did I forget to veto something?”

“You did not,” Tess said. “The transformation is a mental effect, and harder to examine than most. Trust me, you prevented the outcome Chloe was most concerned with.”

“That is not comforting,” Alan said.

“It wasn’t meant to be.”

“I think I will abstain from a veto this round,” Skynet said. “I believe Natalia is making a mistake, but I do not want to decide what is best for her children.”

Natalia looked at Skynet with a complicated expression.

Skynet ignored it.

“I believe that leaves Laurel’s prize for winning the challenge.”

“That is correct,” Tess said.

She turned to Laurel.

“Please select from one of these options.”

Upgrade: A transformation of your choice is upgraded positively. The exact details are not revealed. Benefits will improve, or new ones will be added.

Positive Transformation: A vote will be added at the end of the next challenge, with three options for a positive transformation. These transformations will be drafted in good faith.

Correction: An existing TF of your choice will be removed.

“Can I bank Correction for later?” Laurel asked. “That’s powerful, but I’ve been really lucky with my transformations.”

“That would remove the drama from other votes, so no,” Tess said.

“In that case, I’ll go with Upgrade to Favorite Cephalopod.”

“What’s that?” Alan asked.

“Oh, I have a few legacy TFs, remember?” Laurel said. “Cowgirl is the cool one, but I also have a kind of octopus one.”

“That, and one that broadcasts her memories,” Tess said, “but Chloe kept a secret for once.”

Everyone stared at Chloe.

Chloe did not look grateful.

“Let’s see what Laurel earned!” Tess announced.

Favorite Cephalopod: Bones suck, am I right? Now they are entirely optional for Laurel. She can turn any of her bones into a soft-bodied structure and back without issue. She can also distort her form to inhuman degrees in terms of organs and other structures. (Animal Lover)

Upgrade: Let’s encourage good behavior. Laurel no longer needs to breathe. Totally octopus-like, right? Oxygen will be supplied through a magical system, and carbon dioxide will be extracted and stored.

“You’re a bitch,” Laurel said.

There was not a lot of venom in it.

Chloe, Christian, and Joan blushed.

Natalia and Alan looked confused.

“That sounds cool,” Alan said.

“Very cool,” Tess said with his face.

Alan suddenly blushed.

“Shit.”

“Okay,” Ariadne said, moving before Tess could enjoy that any further. “We’re done with that bullshit. Harem, follow me. Tess, watch the master for a while, please.”

“What’s going on?” Laurel asked.

“I made a promise during your day with Alan,” Ariadne said. “I told the harem I would teach them magic. Today we’re all free, so now is the best time for it.”

“I think we’re missing...” Tess sounded uncertain.

“Let’s do the glow-up for Joan and me later today, please?” Ariadne sounded exhausted.

“Okay, fine.”

Tess moved forward and hugged Ariadne.

“But it’s not like I like you or anything.”

“Don’t make me quote Gossip Girl.” Ariadne shot back.

Ariadne waved a hand.

A door opened in the floor.

“Girls, follow me.”

Alan watched his harem descend into a mysterious tunnel while Sky vanished.

Tess joined him, still wearing Alan’s face.

The two glared at each other for a while.

“Wanna make out?” Alan asked.

“Ew,” Tess said.