Speculation

Bob’s first thought was panic. His alarm hadn’t gone off. He reached for his phone and realized it wasn’t there. Forgot to plug it in again? Of course neither was the nightstand. Why was the room so bright? Where the fuck was the edge of the bed???

Memory started to slowly filter back into his sleep addled brain. The semi. Heidi. The displays of magic. The impact last night had been dulled by the potent cocktail of adrenaline, good whiskey, and what must have been Heidi’s powers, but this morning he was free from such influences and he felt… fantastic! And desperately in need of caffeine.

Seems like Heidi didn’t fix everything.

Still wearing most of last night’s tuxedo, he stumbled out into the kitchen and haphazardly fumbled through the cupboards, finding in short order a French press, a small saucepan, a mug, an electric burr mill grinder, and some whole bean Kenya AA.

Note to self. Ask Heidi for a Keurig. Or at least pre-ground.

The ritual commenced. Boil water, grind beans, stir, press, wait… Finally with a mug of strong black ambrosia in his hand he was able to truly take stock of his situation.

Ok. First. I’m in a hotel room at what I assume is a ski resort.
Second. I’m on a reality show. Which is weird because I always thought those damn things were scripted.
Third. This is damn fine coffee.
Finally, I’m now the proud owner of seven people.
In closing, I’m fucked. In the words of Mose Alison, ‘I don’t worry about a thing ‘cause I know nothin’s gonna be alright’

So… next steps. Clearly I have to go with this because Heidi implied that we’re not even on the same plane of existence. Which means the first thing I need to do is get a shower and put on something other than this monkey suit.

Oh fuck. I have a date with Kayla.

His thoughts raced to how often he would have had an awkward erection from the full body hugs she gave him if his prostate hadn’t hampered blood flow.

Yep. I’m totally screwed.

Kayla sat in the chair with her eyes closed as Darlene put the finishing touches on her makeup. “You have perfect cheekbones, Kayla.”

They had talked until the wee hours, bonding while planning Kayla’s date with Bob, Darlene’s mature counsel easing the younger girl’s mind, while Kayla’s eventual enthusiasm infected the trans woman. The inevitable exploration of the room had led to the discovery of full wardrobes of clothing, none of which actually belonged to them., in the closets, and the outfit that they had selected for Kayla was laid out on the queen sized bed that they had shared the previous night.

It had started from necessity. Their room had only the one bed, and while Kayla had initially suggested sleeping on the couch Darlene would have none of it. After assuring the younger woman that she had no designs on her, Darlene had settled in to sleep. At some point shortly thereafter Kayla had joined her. She awoke in the middle of the night being cuddled, and after some momentary confusion had drifted off with a smile on her face.

Kathy Jo had slept late, awakening to her relief in an empty room. The lecture from Ms. McDaniel the previous night had put her off her step, but what really rattled her was the way the woman had changed gears immediately and begun acting in an almost maternal manner. KJ knew she was a fuck-up, but she wasn’t used to being called on it, and that had caused her to freeze like a deer in headlights under the stony gaze of her former teacher.

And as much as she didn’t want to admit it it had made her wet.

In fact just thinking about it now had her feeling turned on. As her fingers crept down the front of her jeans to scratch that itch she was reminded of Tony’s pathetic attempts at being dominant. It had done nothing for her at the time, which led her to assume that it wasn’t a kink she was down with. Thinking back on it though, perhaps it had just been his ham-fisted manner and the way he had gone about it. Reaching further back in her memory she recalled the night she almost gave it up to Bob. He had brought her to the brink of orgasm and held her there for hours.

And that was back when he was 18.

Thinking about what an experienced Bob could do to her was what brought her over the edge as she bit down on her pillow to stifle her moans.

The open kitchen of The Bavarian, the resort’s cafe, is currently manned by one of the neckbeards, this one in an Aeropostale sweatshirt, a backwards Seattle Mariners cap, and an enormous pair of JNCOs. He moved about the kitchen at a near inhuman speed bustling about as he prepared the brunch buffet.

Alicia sipped her coffee, only half paying attention to her book. This morning she felt the need to not be alone with KJ , feeling a little bad for how she’d basically attacked her former student, and when she woke up, she’d left the room in search of some sort of diversion. She’d been thrilled to find a 1967 printing of The Master and Margarita on one of the café’s bookshelves. She had always meant to reread it in the original language, and was pleased to find that Bulgakov‘s novel held up well in English, but that there were levels of nuance in the Russian that were absent in the translation. She’d burnt through almost a hundred pages before she was distracted by the frenetic movements of the dwarf.

While watching him buzz about she thought over the current situation. Having decided to take it all in stride, she now needed to plan. Bob. She remembered Robert Dobbs fondly… he’d always been a stellar student, straight As, and had been a contender for Valedictorian until the last half of senior year. She was alone among her colleagues in noticing the drastic changes that had occurred in his behavior, but had been unable to get him to open up to her.

And now here she was… widowed, young again, and her prized pupil was all grown up. He did look quite dashing with his roguish beard and the shaved head.

This might not be so bad after all…

Her reverie was interrupted by the arrival of Cassie and Morgan, now chatting like old friends, and Alicia took the opportunity to size up her… not opponents… sister in bondage? Fellow concubines? The terminology didn’t matter. She had no intent for their relationship to be antagonistic. Cassie seemed to genuinely care about Bob, and it was pretty clear Morgan was in way over her head. Coming to a conclusion she waved the two over to her.

“Sleep well?”

The larger woman chuckled as she came and sat at Alicia’s table. “You know, the next time I get kidnapped I want to be held here. The bed was perfect.” This brought a laugh from her companion who took another of the four chairs.

It was shortly after the neckbeard had brought the newcomers coffee and refilled Alicia’s cup that Robin came staggering in, looking like they hadn’t slept a wink. There was a haunted, hunted look in their eyes as they scanned the dining room, and Alicia’s teacher’s eye for detail picked up that they were twitching a little bit, sort of like a terrified rabbit. “Robin? Would you care to join us?”

They let out a noise that could only be described as a squeak and looked like they were about to jump out of their skin, but soon regained at least some composure and timidly approached the table. “Trust me. You do not want to leave your room after midnight. Do I smell coffee?”

Showered and now feeling relatively human, Bob pulled on a gigantic fluffy white bathrobe and stepped out onto the balcony. He felt the chill in the air, but found it was not uncomfortable as he sipped his second cup of coffee. Gazing at the mountain he decided that he had had enough caffeine to jumpstart his thoughts and really started to brain on his situation.

So far I’ve just calmly accepted what’s going on. The problem with that is that it’s what’s gotten me absolutely nowhere in life. Calmly accepting was what got me married twice. The first time to a woman who I thought wouldn’t change. The second time to a woman I thought would. All the warning signs were there both times, but I just didn’t want to buck the system.

Another sip of the surprisingly still hot coffee. So I need to be more proactive. Let’s start by analyzing this shit. What made Heidi or whoever’s really running this shit show decide on the contestants? They each have a deep need or fear or something. Ok. So why these seven specifically? Because I find or found them all attractive? No. That’s too easy. Everyone has needs and I’m a dirty old man who happens to be attracted to anyone and anything. We’d need fucking Disney World to fit everyone I ever found hot. There’s something else.

So let’s review. KJ. I haven’t thought about her in years. She let herself go almost as much as I did. She looks just the way she did back then though. The athlete. What Heidi said really hit home. She fucking broke me. Still, that was about a quarter century ago, and I did plenty of my own fucking up after that. She played softball. Alicia… the number of nights I jerked off to her… I probably went through a whole case of Kleenex just on her. She had such high hopes for me. And if I hadn’t been so stupid I would have seen what Charlie… what Darlene was going through. I’m so happy that she found herself, but I could kick myself for not being there for her.

Cassie is probably my closest confidant in the world now. We work together like we have one brain in two bodies, but she never told me about Ray. Kayla… lovely little Babygirl. I knew all her shit. The number of times I just wanted to pull her into my lap and tell her I’d look out for her… Morgan… when I saw Mattie start to decline I thought it would be gradual, no different from any of the others. I should have kicked it up the chain right away but I kept my mouth shut. Because Mattie asked me to. If I’d done something sooner they would probably have caught on to the fact that she was having mini-strokes and gotten her on blood thinners or something. Maybe they could have arrested it.

Regret. That’s what they all have in common. Unfinished business. So where the fuck does Robin fit in? I barely know them. Not asking them out doesn’t count as a big regret. Hell, I don’t even know what they have in their pants. Oh well… table that.

“Bob, if I were you I’d get some clothes on, your date will be here in about ten minutes.” Heidi’s sudden appearance on the balcony was enough to make him pass coffee through his nose.