Rogue: Chime of opening (but it’s cursed)

ROGUE: ”No need to let the whole bar see you blush - this way, it’s just our little secret.” And I pull out the Chime of opening.

BARD, snorting: Nothing says ‘master of stealth and subterfuge’ like waving a magic noisemaker around.

ROGUE: Hey, the way I see it, clothes are objects- wait, hang on, let me read you the item card: You can strike the chime as an action, pointing it at an object within 120 feet of you that can be opened, such as a door, lid, or lock. The chime issues a clear tone, and one lock or latch on the object opens unless the sound can't reach the object. If no locks or latches remain, the object itself opens. So I want to use a couple charges to ‘unlatch’ her clothes and get a look at those vaunted undies.

SORCERER: I knew it was worth the trouble to loot that lich’s lair!

DM: > Grins <

ROGUE, concerned: Why is he grinning? It’s never good when he’s grinning.

BARD: The last time he grinned like that I only managed to escape by sucking off half the-

DM, interrupting: Let’s just say that lich had an amusing sense of humor, and I’ve been waiting all year for you to use it. You see, this chime turns out to be cursed! As you strike it at the barmaid it begins to glow with an ominous, sickly darkness, and you hear a chuckle echoing in the back of your mind, before the magic reverberates, targeting your own clothing instead of the barmaid's!

ROGUE, wide-eyed: W-wait what?!

BARD: On the bright side you probably don’t have to suck anyone off!

DM: Rogue, could you please roll a D8 for me?