A Saytr (Left Hand Man)

You can see your majestic curling horns, strong torso and handsome mechevious face. You are a satyr, a species of trickster wildfey whose members are wispered about in trepidation and longing. Like the rest of your people, your days consist of wild partying and wilder sex.

You snort. Partying and sex, you think. Yeah right. Any other satyr, hell any other Fey, would be more likely to run you off than invite you to a party or have sex with you. After all, you were an Ironhorn, a rare subtype of satyr whose horns and hoves were made out of iron. This meant that you did not possess the weakness to iron most fey did, but only at the cost of being veiwed as nasty, stoic, and untrustworthy (at best) or violent, evil and dangerous (at worst) by your "fellows". Fey respect power above all else, however, so you might be able to impress them with your capability.... If you weren't level 5 and exiled to the mortal relm where you get killed on a weekly basis for the chance at something called "rare drops". You had no idea what that meant, especially seeing as the only "equipment" you had was a ragged loincloth which preserved your dubious modesty. You sigh and go over your stats, wondering if the update changed anything.

(Note: This is approximately what you look like)

Level 5 Ironhorn Satyr

(Monster, Fey, Satyr, Ironhorn, Wildfey, Explicit)
Experience to level up: 500

Attributes

Strength: 29
Dexterity: 27
Agility: 26
Stamina: 38
Defense: 22
Charisma: 23
Manipulation: 14
Appearance: 33
Perception: 23
Intelligence: 26
Wits: 29

Skills

Woodworking: 16

Brawling 23

Occult 18

Stealth 21

Feats

Monstrous Appearance: Count any attempt to use appearance in a positive way on any being without the Monster subtype as 20 less until they get used to you.

Quick wits: treat your wits stat as 50% higher when improvising.

Silver Tongue - increases the chances of positive conversation checks due to persuasion or intimidation based on Charisma.

Hardy Endurance (Racial Trait): Increases stamina gained during level up. Stamina refills faster during rest. Stamina decreases slower during exertion.

Hard Head (Racial Trait): You have a ridiculously thick skull. Take reduced damage from strikes to the head. Take reduced environmental damage when the damage is focused on your head. Immune to being Dazed.

Ironhorn: Treat charisma as 15 lower when interacting with other beings with the Fey subtype. You are more physically inclined than your peers, increaseing strength and agility gained during level up. In addition, your Natural Weapons count as iron weapons.

Wildfey: You are wildfey, the rebels who neither cower before Oberon nor pay tribute to Titania. You have a natural inclination towards magic and freedom, and other rebels will look favorably upon you. Treat your Charisma as 10 higher when interacting with rebels, and 15 higher when interacting with other wildfey. You learn magic more easily, but have difficulty submitting to authority.

Natural Weapons: you possess a set of natural weapons. You cannot be Disarmed. Crippling attacks instead have a chance to Disarm you.

Spells:

Iron Wool: Makes your skin hard as iron, and resistant to magic. Treat the Defense stat as (occult/2) higher for incoming physical damage whilst this spell is active. Treat the defense stat as (occult X .75) higher for incomming magical damage whilst this spell is active. Does nothing against blunt impacts or environmental damage.

Charge: Gather energy in your legs and launch a magically assisted charge at an enemy. Treat the strength stat as (occult/2) higher for this attack. Causes knockback to the enemy.

You stare at your stats in shock. Wildfey? Magic? Is this really happening? You thought in disbelief. You'd never had magic before. This could be big! This could be your chance to prove to everyone how powerful you are! Then you look at the description of your spells and groan. Yep, the update gave you magic alright. Shitty magic that either wasn't going to be off much use (iron wool) or was a reskinned and nerfed version of something you already had (charge). It also lowered your social stats, which had built in penalties to begin with! You sigh. You suppose you really shouldn't have gotten your hopes up, but still. You sit dejectedly down on your bed... Only to wince when your rump connects with the hard stony ground instead. "Oh for God's sake, Damm update wasn't satisfied with with nerfing me, it's gotta reset my bed too." You growl.

Sigh. Well, you know the drill. You've been doing it every few weeks or so for the past... You can't remember exactly how long it was but it was a long time. Go out, get your bed back, get some food, wait, maybe kill an adventurer or two, eventually get killed.

Well not this time! You think, suddenly filled with stubborn determination. This time I'm going to do something! At the very least, I'm going to make the adventurers work to kill me!!