Nocturnal Observations

Chapter 51

As expected, the girls are already asleep. After you stumble across the lawn to the boathouse, your thoughts pervaded by pictures of tits and the feeling of hands all over your body, you look into the boathouse through a small round window at the front door. All four girls have snuggled up in their blankets and the hammocks rock easily with their movements. You can detect Millie by her golden hair on one side and Claire is in the other one. Both breath regularly.

Then you freeze. What the...? One of the blankets moves abnormally. You take a closer look but cannot see who it is. In any case, the person is restless and fidgets under the covers. Suddenly movement comes in the situation, the duvet flies in the air, two delicate, bare legs stretch up, then whiz down and heave the young body of Denise out of her hammock. Her feet land on the carpet that you have laid out. It is dark in the room except for the dim light of a bedside lamp. Apparently the girls don't want to sleep in the dark. When Denise turns to the door, you quickly turn away and stand to the side of the door. Your back pressed against the wall. It would not be a good thing if you were observed while cocking. You would lose all of your accumulated trust from Susan and Claire and authority over Denise if you were now labeled a pervert. You want to make your way back and crawl like a ninja over the grass back to the house but the door next to you opens quietly and slowly. She swings up in your direction and Denise doesn't see you as she steps out into the cool summer night. You both look towards the house where the light is no longer on. You hold your breath as Denise slowly walks across the lawn. You stand in her back and can still see her in the dark. You have to narrow your eyes so as not to lose her and when you are already thinking about how to sneak past her, you are surprised to see that she is not wearing pants. Your jaw drops and you can only avoid a moan by forcefully clapping your hand against your open mouth. Denise walks barefoot and without pants and panties across the lawn towards the beach. Her pajama shirt plays around her hips and her tight bubble but, whose white skin looks like a signpost in the dark. Yes, this is awesome. Yes, she likes you. Yes, she undressed in front of you. But no, you have the moral superiority and the obligation not to pounce on her like a mangy dog in heat. After all, you are Finn fucking Lynchwood, a decent human being, a classical man of honor and integrity and... never mind. You are already on the way to her. Shit. You can't deny it, you're just being controlled by your lower instincts. Knowing your love for your sisters is making you adventurous and her body is as tempting as the first glass of ice water after a long walk through the desert.

You are only a dozen meters away from her slim body when she arrives at the sod. Where the sand of the beach begins, she sinks into the last foothills of green, kneels down and looks out over the lake. It is enough to stop your steps. You stupid asshole! your drill sergeant roars at you desperately. On her! Catch! Attack! Take her! For you! For her! For human culture! Everything, but please fuck her already! And you take another step towards the girl. Then another. You're stalking her, from the blind spot, ready for the **** blow. You feel her like a shark with all your senses. Well, you can imagine that too, but on the other hand you have so much adrenaline and testosterone in your body that you wonder not to bleed from your eyes yet.

And Denise even comes to meet you with her deeds. Fascinated you watch the girl sitting on her knees in the grass, her thighs bent under her buttocks, her legs spread. Her bare feet dig into the grass and her toes cling to the green as if it meant salvation. She lifts her hips, leans forward slightly and it looks like she has both hands between her legs. That's it! Come on now! Fuck her! You can hardly stand it anymore. Your heart is pounding in your chest and the blood rushes through your veins as you take another step towards it. Yes, she's definitely fingering herself, you see. Denise is swaying on her knees back and forth, her shoulders rising and falling in a **** attempt to satisfy herself. Her breath is loud and choppy, her gaze is fixed on the lake. A whimper penetrates from her lips. It swells until it's almost a lament, then ebbs away just to rise again.

Two things hold you back. For one thing, the thought of taking Denise in the same place as Millie. It is simply not right. You love these little gestures of 'high diplomacy'. You don't think Millie really understands what they mean to you. It all started on this hideous evening on the street. Dirty, dark, and almost blind with anger it was she, vomiting her embarrassment, which did not make you a criminal. You just stopped beating this weakling because Millie was there and was alone. At some point you have to explain to her how much it means to you to be there for her and to show it with such small gestures of love and care.

The other reason is, that somewhere between all the adrenaline, the blood pressure in all your veins, your stiff rod, hurting, who could break a wedge in the strongest reinforced concrete wall and the sheer, animalistic desire to jump a female of your kind and spoil her for all other people in the world, the whimpering of Denise stops you. It is not a whimper of pleasure and joy. It is a ****, almost panicked and anxious whimper that becomes a sob as you take another, verry hesitant step towards her.

"Damn it!" the girl whines. She is still fingering herself with dedication and quick movements. She leans forward until her forehead is almost on the grass floor. "Please... come on..." Can't she come? you ask yourself. Slowly you perceive the world a little more clearly. Denise is really ****. You think briefly about what to do. She is not one of your sisters and in such a situation you do not know how she will react to closeness. But leaving is out of the question. But what then?

You decide - based on a gut feeling rather than common sense - to try the simplest way. You step up to her, stand next to her and put your hand on her shoulder as gently as you can. You are not surprised that she has not noticed you yet. She is so immersed in her little sad world that you even have to squeeze her shoulder firmly to get a reaction from her. The fabric of her shirt is wet with cold sweat and her shoulder feels as if it almost wants to jump out of the joint because of exertion. But when Denise Van Buren turns to you, she does it so painfully slowly. Her eyes are swollen with tears and stares blankly and unemotionally at you. You look down on someone who is staring at you from hell, not believing what she is seeing. Your heart bursts at the thought of what might have triggered this reaction and when you think you could have been, you already knelt on your knees next to the girl.

"Finn?" Denise breathes and her voice is shrill with grief. "What..." Her fingers still run tight into her, completely absent and not dreaming of what sight she offers you. You want to say something, but you don't know what. You lack the experience you have with Millie. After all, you choose the easy and direct way.

"Denise, what's the matter with you?" Her eyes are still empty and are staring at you blankly, causing an uncomfortable shiver to run down your spine. But then an ounce of life comes into the girl and she stretches her arms for you, her fingers glistening with moisture.

"Take me Finn, please." She wraps her arms around you and as she feels your closeness, her hug grows stronger every second until you have trouble breathing. "Take me. Sleep with me. Fuck me,” she pleads in a brittle, shrill voice and clings to you as if you were her only chance in life.

"Talk to me Denise," you press out between your lips, but enclose the trembling girl with your arms. "What is the problem?"

"I can't," she sobs. "I can't make it. It is too much."

"Denise, you're strangling me." And it's not a joke. "I hold you. No fear. But you're killing me here.” The girl loosens her cramped arms a little and you look at each other. Her face is torn with fear and sadness and... sheer panic. Oh shit what's going on here?

"Do not go. Please! Take me. Fuck me. Please! You can have me.” You feel like getting hit by a truck and don't know what to say. Is... Is this nightmare... my fault?

"Let me help you" is the only thing you can think of, but the girl just shakes her head in panic.

"I can't. I can not stand this anymore. Take me. Please.” She shakes your shoulders in panic to encourage you to take what is yours in her eyes. You are gripping her more tightly now, clutching her shoulders in return. You both sit in the grass against the romantic backdrop of the lake, but none of it gets through to you.

"What. Is. Going. On!” You articulate every word as clearly as you can, but Denise still shakes her head in denial.

"The thinking. It is too much. I can't do it. I can not stand this anymore. The thoughts are too much for me.” She looks at you, a tragedy that you have rarely seen. "My brother..." She clings her hands around her head and sways back and forth. "Oh God my Brother..." Then she breaks down completely. Crying hysterically, she falls into your lap and you caress her and talk to her calmly. It takes a long time, but you don't look at the clock. Something terrible must have happened and in fact you're afraid to ask her. When she regains consciousness, however, she starts all by herself.

You manage to keep a neutral face. Denise curled up in your lap, whimpering and sobbing, and tells of her experiences in a monotone voice. In a way, you actually bear your part of the blame for her condition.

The way she describes it, Denise couldn't believe Millie and you were getting along so well. She never had the idea that what her half-brother did to her could be wrong. It was normal for her to blow him, wank him, or let him take her if he wanted to. And that he 'lends her' to his friends has still not grasped her. The blood freezes in your veins at the thought and **** and manslaughter swirl through your thoughts. The body in your lap should actually be cold and lifeless. But in fact, her naivety saved her life.

"... and when I saw Millie can have what I want, I knew you loved each other" Denise sobs and you don't mind that she knows your biggest secret. Nothing is less important in her status than that you sleep with your sister. "I just didn't understand why you didn't want to spoil her. Why you didn't want to sleep with me. Isn't that what the boys want from us?” You can't answer. Now it's you who looks out over the lake and directs all your hatred towards a person you don't even know. Fortunately, Denise is in an emotional state in which she tends to be more self-conscious. "How can she be so happy with you without you forcing her to do things she doesn't want? God, I'm so stupid. I should have seen it. What he did to me...” At first her voice grew angrier, but now it breaks again. You caress her hair and Denise wraps her other arm around yours. She is so light on your lap. "But I love him. Or I believe it. I don't know. The thoughts are so heavy.” She takes a deep breath. "And Millie talked about you so nicely. I'm so jealous. At first I thought that she had to pay a high price for it. But I didn't find one. She is just happy. Just happy...” She looks up at you, her whole face, her cheeks, her throat wet with tears and snot. You look down on her and don't stop petting her. "What do I have to do so that I can have it too?"

This question is really not easy to answer. Megan is acting so odd and you can still feel the proximity of Emma to you. You miss Millie and Megan, just after what you just experienced. But if you tell Denise now that your heart is almost too full, what would happen to her? But what if you give in to her now? The answer to this question is easy to find. Millie could teach Denise everything like Megan seemed to have taken Emma under her wings. But wouldn't that also end in disaster? Isn't it already? You also take a deep breath and try to calm down. The little creature on your lap is still looking at you with wet adorable eyes. You two don't care that she is lying half-naked on you.

If you messed it up with Millie or Megan, you could always rely on your connection. No matter what happens, you always stick together. So you could speak to your sister the truths that they had to hear. Because you were always there, even if everything went wrong. That's how you got together with them. It is different now. You have no such connection with Denise and if you say the wrong thing here... then I will literally kill her. At best, I condemn her to a life like Maureen, only that she is not as strong and will perish much faster. And when I sleep with her - not to mention my girlfriends - I make her feel like everyone else.

"Should I tell you what to do?" You hear your voice and get a little panic attack because you've overtaken yourself. That was not wise. Of course Denise nods and rubs her cheek against your chest. You both have to go through that now. "You won't like it. So listen carefully. That's the only way I can help you. Roger that?"

"Yes understood. I do everything I promise.” The corners of your mouth twitch for a moment. Who doesn't like to hear such a sentence from such a pretty girl? If only the circumstances were different. You take a deep breath again. "I'm not going to sleep with you Denise." As expected, her eyes widen with fear and disappointment, but she doesn't stand up against it, but softly fits in with her fate. She is completely broken. Her pig of a brother broke her and she is intelligent enough to see what has become of her. "Not yet." That makes Denise listen. You have to think the words quickly and the plan takes shape in the speed at which you can say his words to the **** thing on your chest, but they are still considered and not spoken out of a hot reflex for sex. "Your behavior is far too destructive at the moment. I want you to calm down and collect yourself. It can wait as long as it takes. And I help you with every step at every second of the day. I like to hold your hand with every thought."

"But the thoughts scare me."

"I know. But you have to face them. Gladly with me on your side.” You brush a tear from her cheek with your thumb and realize how much you miss Millie. "Let sex and bad feelings be my concern. We'll get through this together. I won't drop you, understand?"

"Yes." And this time her voice is already firmer, fascinated by you and under your spell.

"I'll show you that there are people who like you without having to destroy yourself for them." You look at her steadily. "I'll show you why Millie is so happy. But on my terms, okay?” You don't know if it's a good sign, but Denise nods immediately. Sniffling, she wipes her arm over her nose.

"I..." She looks at the grass under your body. "I'd like to sleep with you." She looks at you again and in her eyes you clearly see hope for something new. Something better than her previous life. Oh shit Finn Lynchwood. "Honestly." You generate one of the warmest smiles of your life and give it to Denise.

"I know." Miraculously, you manage to put a good mix of rigor and affection in your voice. "But not now." Noooooooooooohohohoiiiiinnnnaa! You fucking idiot! I'm gonna kill youhuhuhuhoooo! "Your behavior is too destructive and I'm afraid that if I allow it, I will put you, Millie and Megan in danger. I hope you understand that.” Instead of an answer Denise hugs you again. She is now very calm, breathes quietly and rarely moves. You gather your strength and authority and while your fingertips gently move over her skin you speak the words that will connect you, at least, for a very long time. “At some point you will have made it and be strong and beautiful and confident. I am happy to help you, you know that. But I also have to be sure that you are not a danger to my sisters. If you want me to help you, you do exactly what I say. Okay?” Finally, she nods slowly.

"I'll show you that I deserve you. I can do it.” It actually makes you smile and a miracle happens and Denise grins a little too. "I promise it."

"I know" you say and pat her cheerfully on the upper arm. At some point it is time to get up. Only now Denise realizes her nakedness, but there is no place in your life for shame tonight. You hug and Denise sneaks back into the boathouse, but not without turning back and laughing at you. You stretch your thumb up and cheer her up with it. Then Denise Van Buren disappears into the shed and you stand alone on the lawn, your chest wet and cold and your heart full of anger.

• Yea, no sex with Denise for you... for now. But you are strong. And strong man like this chapter and support me at https://www.patreon.com/writingshark Be a man. (Okay, that was mean. I think you are a man, even without... well, at least like this chapter...)