I've Had It Up To Here

"You don't have to like me. Fuck, you don't have to even be nice to me. But if you're going to be anything you're going to be civil, do you understand me?"

I wasn't ready to go full nuclear here, but I was pretty fucking close. And even though I wasn't saying everything or putting my cards on the table, my tone and my anger were making it clear that I wasn't fucking around and also making it clear that however I was getting this strength it came with the absolute certainty that I had some hold over her.

Which I did.

"You will at the very least stop bugging me every five fucking minutes and trying to micromanage my life. If we've got to be around each other for the rest of the week, you can pull that off. Otherwise..."

I let the threat hang implied, watching as she swallowed it whole before I shook my head and half-turned around.

"Seriously don't know why you've got to be this way, Kim. I haven't done anything to deserve this and you know it."

It's just a flash, but I don't miss it. Her eyes move over to the group and then snap back to me and at first I'm willing to dismiss it as just her checking to make sure that no one noticed my outburst.

But when I turn back I realize that she wasn't looking at the group, she was looking at someone in specific. When the chips were down and she was looking for an escape, when I pressed her on what I'd done to her, her eyes fell on him.

And that makes sense. It clicks. The first day and her and me in the bathroom. The things she said about him to me. The way she spoke about him in combination with what she did that night with some throwaway freshman.

girl-Kim had an itch. He had the means to scratch it.

For fucks sake, was I really caught in a love triangle with Blake?

Again?

She can have him and I almost want to tell her that but something holds me back and instead I spend the rest of the last bit of the tour seething about my bad luck. Not only did I have Blake messing with my head but now girl-Kim trying to interject herself into something she couldn't possibly have grasped the whole of.

This whole situation was fucked up beyond repair and I'm not going to say that it's wholly my fault, but I can't take the blame for all of it.

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