Well, two thirds of him seem to like it.

"Uh... Hi," Frank said gracefully. He was becoming increasingly concerned that he wasn't just dreaming.

"Oh good, you've caught up," added the not-fairy, "You're correct, you're not just dreaming. You're in the... well there's not really a name for it so let's just work on the explanation for _what _it does." Frank noticed his companion reading his thoughts. That trope about a character feeling offended by a mind reader invading their privacy was no longer just a trope.

"Get used to it," the smug bird girl told him, "It's going to keep happening."

Frank sighed in resignation. "Then let's get back to what this is," he asked in annoyance... and concern.

"First, I have to explain what exactly dreams are. Have you heard the belief that dreams are like little worlds in your head?" Frank nodded. "Well it's half-right. Every person in the world capable of sapience has what we call a Dream. The premise is that each person has and exists somewhat in their own pocket dimension, usually only accessed through special meditation or sleep." The concept was ridiculous but the explanation made sense enough, "What you know of as 'reality' is a series of pocket dimensions you're living inside of at any given state of awareness. When you're asleep, you exist in your own scatterbrained pocket dimension that is usually formless as the human brain isn't capable of sustaining a universe on its own." Frank felt relieved somewhat. At least he didn't have superpowers. According to this bird, reality was like a series of nesting dolls.

"Yes, exactly. Outside of your body, whether you're asleep and accessing your own Dream, or when you're awake, you are always inside Earth's Dream, and are under Earth's protections."

"Earth is sapient?" Frank asked, curiosity overpowering his concern for the moment.

"It's more like Earth is a collection of instincts formed by the sapient life living in its dream. Whether the Dream or the humans came first is unknown." She answered, as if that was any more rational.

"So where do you and I fit in with this?" Frank asked, trying to move past the existential crap.

"If Earth's dream were a chat room, I would be an admin. I have the capacity to update the Dream in real time and bypass that instinct crap," she added, her tone unbroken by the completely freaky shit she just said.

"You can... change reality whenever you want?" Frank asked, trying to

"Yes, but only in the confines of Earth's Dream. Any Dreams outside of, or separate from Earth are beyond me," she continued, "And since I have them, so do you!" She finished with a cheer.

Frank looked at Ava's door and began to connect dots. "So what did I just... do?"

"Again, Through me you have the capacity to connect an individual Dream to Earth's Dream. Changes you make to a person will be reflected both ways. Since you were inside Ava's Dream, you changes you made to her mind and body will be updated."

Frank felt the color drain from his face. The changes he made were hardly innocuous. "But I changed her opinion on Cheer Captain, her personality, AND her body! Are you telling me tha-

"Yes! You should be proud of yourself! You took a girl insecure about her flat chest, gloomy personality, and her lack of popularity, and fixed ALL of those problems!" She added, interrupting Frank's little emotional episode. "She's already woken up, so I imagine she's noticed her new giant tits and her crush on you!" Frank felt dizzy, trying not go mad with power or something. Frank can change Earth's Dream? Doesn't that make him... "God?" he asked, knowing that she was listening to his thoughts anyway. He couldn't handle this, he was freaking out. This was too much, that kind of power can't be...

"Hmm... you're right, it won't work like this," the fairy concluded, "Your fantasy is to be a harem protagonist who finds himself surrounded with absurdly attractive women for no apparent reason. That doesn't work if you're aware of the reason. So naturally, I need to make a few changes." Frank noticed about 3 red flags with what she just said.

"First, I need to put you to sleep. You're bothering the rest of us." Frank was about to ask what she meant when suddenly she waved her hand. In response to that motion, blue particles surrounded Frank and then... another Frank fell out of him, seemingly out cold. Frank (the one still awake... well, not really but more awake then that one) was all out of panic and just looked back at the bird girl in defeated confusion.

She answered the obvious, wordless question. "In psychological terms, that's your Superego. The part of your conscience that is incredibly critical of yourself. Essentially I just made you stop second-guessing yourself." True enough, Frank felt significantly less panicked now.

"Second change, I need to seal your memories." Even without his superego, Frank was scared at that statement. "Oh, nononono, I'm not going to give you amnesia or anything, I'm just going to make it so that when you're awake, you can't remember any of this. As far as you're concerned, yesterday you rescued a Yellow Cardinal bird from a wire in the park and while you were sleeping you were dreaming about nothing. That way, you can be as clueless as you like for maximum Harem Anime fetish!" She cheered, tweeted really.

"That reminds me, how did you get caught on a wire? Couldn't you just... undo it by fiddling with Earth's Dream?" He asked, trying to confirm if he was really understanding everything.

"That wire wasn't normal. My guess is that a mage was trying to capture me and use my powers to manipulate the Dream. That's why I was so hostile to you, sorry."

A mage. Frank shrugged. It was honestly the most believable thing he had heard from this woman.

"Okay," Frank decided to sum up. "You are a fairy who lets me change people while we're asleep, both physically and mentally. I have turned a quiet, flat cheerleader into a legitimate real life big titty kuudere who is now crushing on me and is going to endeavor to become Cheer Captain." I gesture to my sleeping doppelganger on the ground, "You have removed my ability to regret or remember the events of what transpires while I'm asleep so that I get to live out some harem anime fantasy. And finally you're not going to take no for an answer, I can't just tell you to fuck off and leave me alone because you've already done enough."

A cold fury surrounded my nameless companion, and she squinted her tiny eyes at me, "Well, you COULD, but I don't think you wanna know what happens to people who reject my gifts."

Frank sighed in defeat. "Fine, so what now-"

And then he, too, was woken up by his alarm clock.