Improper Topics Over Dinner

“Aunt Lainey’s here!?”, “YOU HAVE A SISTER!?” Your daughter and the other girls react in shock simultaneously.

You just told Becca that you met your long lost sister when she asked you what happened with your talk with her father. Thankfully, the girls controlled their volume so as to not bother the formal program of the gala that’s currently happening in the background of your conversation. The first course for dinner has already been served as well, so some of the reactions were muffled by some of the girls having food in their mouth.

“Why is it weird that Mr. Craig has a sister?” Paige asks, not understanding why that information is such a big deal to the others.

“I thought you were an only child?” Tanya asks right after Paige.

“I thought so too. Mr. Craig’s wiki doesn’t mention any siblings.” Maddy adds.

“His social media profile also doesn’t show any siblings.” Becca adds after Maddy.

“How come I’ve never heard of your sister, Jay?” Cassie asks you in confusion too, and everyone seems to realize that this is a topic that’s not normally brought up since even Cassie doesn’t know about it.

“Okay~, relax guys. There’s a simple explanation to all your questions. Dad doesn’t like bringing Aunt Lainey up… ever” Stella answers everyone, to the disappointment of Cassie, who was obviously looking for a much more detailed explanation.

“I mean — EVER. I only know the story because Mom told me about it when I was little.” Stella explains.

“What is the story then? Why don’t you like bringing her up?” Cassie rephrases her original question.

“She gets what she gives.” You answer Cassie, a lot colder and angrier than you normally sound, taking the girls aback by your delivery.

…

“I guess that pretty much sums up your dislike of bringing it up.” Cassie reacts to your short answer with a chuckle. She looks at the others who, just like her, don’t seem to be satisfied with your original answer.

“Let’s table this discussion and have Stella tell us the details later, okay?” Cassie immediately adds before any of the other girls start to hound you with questions.

You give Cassie an appreciative smile for the save. A smile that she returns. The other girls agree to Cassie’s suggestion, and drop the topic for now, having seen how you got riled up at having to explain that situation. Unfortunately, with the abrupt end of that topic, an awkward silence envelopes the table afterwards.

…

“All proceeds of this auction are for the benefit of the National Institute of Mental Health…” your table hears the host of the event inform the guests, as your table continues to sit in silence.

“How come you never brought up your aunt with Cassie, Stella? Aren’t you guys like best friends?” Viv asks Stella teasingly, breaking the silence.

“I barely know Aunt Lainey! I barely even remember her. She left when I was like… what? Four?” Stella explains, and you can’t help but nod to confirm that her math is correct.

“I thought we agreed not to bring up the topic?” Cassie asks in annoyance, making Viv immediately apologize.

“I just wanted to break the ice, okay? The silence was getting awkward.” Viv says defensively. “Plus, I wasn’t technically asking Jay about it.” Viv adds.

“If we’re not discussing that particular topic, I’d like to go back to what I previously asked, Jay. Did you and my father talk about anything else?” Becca reminds you.

“Oh, right. He just introduced me to some of the guests here. I actually met Mrs. Sachs, the head of my publishing house, while I was with your dad; and she basically told me my sabbatical is over.” You inform everyone with a chuckle. The others find it funny, Maddy seems to be excited at the thought of you writing again, but Becca seems to be focused on finding out more about your time with her father.

“Anything else?” Becca prods you some more.

You’re not sure the last few things Mr. Hoffman told you are things you should relay to Becca, as they don’t seem to paint Mr. Hoffman’s outlook of her in a positive light; but you’re pretty sure that’s exactly what Becca’s fishing to hear.

“Uh~, is there something in particular you want to find out that your father might’ve told me?” You ask her.

“In particular? I wanted to make sure he’s not already selling me off to have your baby.” Becca nonchalantly replies, to the snarfing reaction of Stella, who wasn’t quite prepared for Becca’s concern. Cassie starts to rub Stella’s back, after Stella starts coughing from taking down her drink the wrong way.

“Why is that such a huge concern? Is it that weird for your dad to be so eager for grandchildren?” Brooke asks.

“He’s not so much eager as he is ****.” Becca answers. “His only son is infertile.” Becca then adds, getting Stella to snarf again at the water she was drinking to recover from her first snarf. Becca doesn’t seem to be distracted by it, and continues her answer.

“His fear of my supposed exclusive attraction to women didn’t help assuage his fears either. Even though he doesn’t say it, we know he’s afraid that he won’t have any grandchildren. Not because he cares for our own happiness, mind you; but because his biggest fear is his empire falling outside of his family’s hands.” Becca informs you.

“How do you know that your brother has weak swimmers!? Please tell me that’s not an over the dinner table conversation your family has.” Stella asks in shock and disgust, after recovering from snarfing.

“How’s everyone’s day? My sperm count’s on the low side. Oh really? Yes. Well, anyway, can you pass the potato salad?” Viv jokes.

“Now you know how I feel when you guys talk about my sex skills when we’re eating.” You jokingly point out.

“Just to clarify a few things, my brother’s condition isn’t just ‘on the low side’, it’s the complete lack thereof. As for—” Becca explains.

“Azoospermia.” Maddy says involuntarily, making Becca pause mid-sentence. Maddy seems to realize this, blushing in shyness after getting everyone’s attention. “That… that’s the medical term for when a boy doesn’t produce… sperm. I read it in a medical textbook once.” Maddy explains, her voice growing quieter and quieter as she explained it.

“I’m not particularly familiar with the term, but my brother’s condition is one where he doesn’t produce spermatozoa, yes. As for how I found out that information, I chanced upon hearing it during their shouting match when my brother refused to seek further medical treatment for it. My father is almost assuredly biding his time on that front, but he of course doesn’t like to proceed without… alternatives. Hence, his excitement to find out that it’s actually possible for me to be attracted to the opposite sex.” Becca explains.

“Why do you have to make it sound like he’s just treating you like cattle?” Brooke asks.

“Oh, apologies. I should have made it sound like he treats us like prized cattle.” Becca replies sarcastically.

“Okay~, touchy subject.” Brooke replies with her hands up, not pushing the discussion further.

You want to assure Becca that her father isn’t at all like that, but your short interaction with him didn’t exactly paint a different picture for you either. Still, you want to comfort Becca in some way.

“Becca, he may not express it in the most conventional of ways, but your father told me he does love you and cares for you.” You say in an attempt to comfort her. Hearing your statement doesn’t really give Becca much pause, and she immediately takes a deep sigh after hearing your words.

“Apologies. We should be having fun. I’m not being a good host to my guests if the topics of discussion during a supposedly fun event are the issues I have with my father… or the faulty equipment my brother has for that matter.” Becca apologizes.

“We wouldn’t even be enjoying this fancy dinner if you didn’t invite us, Becca. I say, you can talk about your brother’s broken ding-dong as much as you want for the night.” Viv jokes, getting everyone to laugh.

“That being said, we’d prefer if you didn’t keep talking about your brother’s broken ding-dong.” Brooke points out.

“So you’re only interested in that kind of talk if it involves Jay’s ding-dong?” Viv asks back.

“Please don’t call it my ding-dong.” You interject.

“You’d prefer if we called it your junior, Junior?” Viv teasingly asks you.

“I’d prefer we don’t talk about it at all, to be honest. We have company that might not be as comfortable with it as you girls are.” You reply to Viv, side-eyeing towards Paige, so she knows who you’re referring to.

“Oh! Don’t mind me, Mr. Craig!” Paige reacts. “I’m used to it by now.” Paige adds, trying to be nonchalant about it.

“Yeah, Dad. Paige and I have been talking about you all the time since we started hanging out again.” Stella informs you.

“All the time?” Brooke asks.

“Calm down, B. Your jealousy is showing.” Viv jokes.

“Shut up.” Brooke quickly replies.

“I might have to ask you to refrain from doing it ‘all the time’, Stella. I wouldn’t want my secretary to have a deeper knowledge than I do of the sex life of someone I’m dating.” Becca suddenly jumps in. Although her request sounded serious, you can see a glimmer in her eye that she’s saying it teasingly.

“Oh! Consider it dropped Ms. Hoffman! I mean Becca! Sorry. I mean, it was a professional request right? Please don’t take it the wrong way.” Paige rambles in panic, getting Becca to try and hide her snigger with her fingertips.

“Relax, Paige. I was kidding.” Becca finally frees Paige from her panicked misery.

“That is going to be complicated though, if you two start dating.” Viv chimes in.

“It would be weird for me to start dating Jay?” Becca asks in confusion.

“No. Not you.” Viv replies, waiving off Becca’s question. “Paige.” Viv clarifies.

“Me!? No! You don’t have to worry about that Becca. I’m not…” Paige immediately reacts, but pauses midway to look at you with wide eyes. She involuntarily bites her lip before blinking rapidly. “I’m not attracted to Mr. Craig in any way.” Paige finally continues. Becca raises her eyebrow towards you, knowing that that’s not technically true; as you both know that you unlocked Paige’s Lust Score yesterday.

“You see that? Weird already.” Viv jokes.

“Then maybe shut up about it.” Stella says through gritted teeth.

“I would just like to point out that if I shut up about everything, we won’t have anything left to talk about.” Viv sarcastically replies.

“We can talk about how you Bill Cosby-ed me this morning.” Stella replies with an equal amount of sarcasm. The girls who weren’t there are just confused by the implication of Stella’s statement, but don’t audibly ask for an explanation since Viv immediately reacts to it.

“You forgave me for that already!” Viv replies, trying her hardest not to shout. “Also, if we’re suggesting topics, we can talk about how Cassie wants to bang you without your dad present. That’s a fun topic too.” Viv adds, and this one actually gets the other girls, except Becca, to audibly gasp in reaction.

“I find it surprising that they find that surprising. I thought that was already the set-up of your relationship?” Becca asks you.

“I mean, there’s a difference between having a set-up and actually, you know, going for it.” You answer Becca, somewhat referencing your hall pass with the girls as well.

“Sounds like a waste of a set-up.” Becca replies playfully.

“I can’t believe you guys are more shocked that Cassie wants to explore something with me romantically, and not with Viv tonguing my hooch while I was asleep!” Stella reacts in disbelief.

“Here is your second course…” Lizzie, the waitress, says with another group of waiters clearing the table of the plates you already finished.

“Perfect timing as always, Lizzie.” Viv tells Lizzie, while giving her the finger guns and a wink.

“Thanks, Chef Nguyen.” Lizzie replies with a polite smile.

After the wait staff serves the second course, and after all of you start digging in, Maddy breaks the ice once more.

“So~, I’m guessing Viv doing that was what caused all the screaming earlier?”