Of course I am you assclown narrator

John jerks awake, his room cloaked in darkness, his eyes barely open as he reaches from his phone.

He prepares for the blinding light as he turns it on to look at the time, as he does, he's shocked to see that the numbers have been changed to some sort of weird symbols, almost like Nordic runes but slightly different.

John then rubs his eyes, hoping it's an effect of his tiredness however after he does, the symbols still remain.

He puts the phone down in shock, wondering if he's got some sort of virus after hours upon hours of porn surfing, but his attention is taken from the symbols and replaced with shock as a booming voice calls from the dark with a question, "Ready for your new journey?".

John almost jumps through his roof, eyes darting to the source but then, in his shock, he sees the darkened outline of a huge figure, even larger than himself.

He scans the figure and in his feared state sheepishly asks, "W-w-who are you?! What are you doing in my house?! Please, I don't have a lot of money!" As John stammers with pleas and almost begs, the booming voice calls out once again, "Quiet!"

John then flinches in fear of just the figures voice alone. The only sound in the room now being John's shuddering breaths, but the silence is cut by the figures voice, "You found the path, now, are you ready to walk it?" John continues to stammer before saying, "Uh-uh-uh, y-y-yeah?".

The figure lets out a single grunt before saying "Good, now remember, you were warned".

John is confused before saying, "What?" Just then, the figure stretches his arm and a massive hand shoots out of the shadows.

John almost shouts in fear but his shout is muffled by the massive hand which grabs him by the head and in the blink of an eye.

The arm pulls John out of his bed and pulls him into the darkness like a rubber band snapping back.