Not All Aids are What We Expect

“Fluttershy,” said Twilight, “I’ve been wondering this for a while, why didn’t you change your staff out when you changed your focus of Worship? First, you were a Nature priestess who followed Celestia, then you switched over to a Moon priestess who followed Luna shortly after her return, then switched over to being an Arcana priestess after my ascension before going back to being a Nature priestess while still keeping me as your divine focus. But through all of it, you have never changed staves; you’re still using the one you started your career with way back when, the rest of your gear has updated, but your original staff stays by your side.”

“I guess I have a bit too much emotional investment in my staff,” said Fluttershy in her usual withdrawn manner.

“I know the feeling,” said Twilight, “we all do, and the way we get around that is our private collections. Every staff I have ever used that I could return home with is in my own personal museum. Pinkie has a section of her cave dedicated to all the equipment she’s used but decided to no longer adventure with. Applejack has a section of her home where she has all her former equipment in cases to keep them safe from less careful family members, and Rainbow...”

“I usually take a minimalistic approach, almost everything I use was made by a friend or me; regardless, I have a few hidden cubby holds where I keep older equipment for emergency situations. Does some of it have sentimental value to me? Most of it sure, but I realized that if I hold onto equipment for sentimental reasons only then I’m holding myself back. If your sentiments about equipment is preventing you from taking advantage of objectively better equipment; then it’s time to reevaluate your approach and retire your current equipment. That doesn’t mean you have to get rid of it, just that you shouldn’t take it on adventures with you anymore.”

“I...think, I understand,” said Fluttershy, “I guess I was afraid that my staff would be forgotten after I did anything like that.”

“Think of it this way,” said Rainbow, “all the old equipment you held onto can be passed down to the next generation, you’re not removing it from use but rather deciding to safeguard it until the time to pass it down comes along.”

“I like that sentiment,” said Twilight, “at some point, we’ll all be parents, in one way or another, and passing down our prior gear to our children is a bit of a tradition, especially by former adventurers. We’re getting to the point where we really can’t do the role of adventurer anymore; this is basically one of our last big hurrahs before we hang up our packs and call it quits.”

“I suppose you’re right,” said Fluttershy, “I just can’t figure out how to do any of that in my own way.”

“We can help,” Rainbow, “that’s what friends do, all you need to do to start is think about who you are and what you would do to pay your respects to the gear you have to regrettably leave behind.”

“I think I understand,” said Fluttershy, “I’ll get to work thinking on everything like that once we get back home.”

*****************************************************************

After doing a quick inventory check, at the insistence of Twilight and Rainbow, the group made its way into the library room. They hadn’t even made it ten feet into the room before Twilight acted like a foal in a candy store, rushing about looking at everything she could and grabbing few before dashing off somewhere else in the chamber. Rainbow, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie just rolled their eyes at the violet mare’s antics.

“She gets really excited about texts,” said Rainbow to their new companions, “it’ll be a while before she calms down enough to actually progress with us. As if to emphasize this point, Twilight could be seen stuffing various texts with careful exuberance into her bags, all of them.

They all just shook their heads and did their best to progress through the library, after what felt like hours they came to a desk with a door on the other side that had a sign that read [quote]Ring Bell for service[/quote] next to what looked like a hotel’s desk bell. Pinkie pushed down on it multiple times, causing the bell to ring in a way that was clearly unintended. A few minutes after the pink mare had stopped an anthropomorphic dog came out of the door in a skimpy secretary uniform, so skimpy it could be called outright slutty. This canine didn’t look quite like some diamond dog offshoot, she/he had both sets of genitals, a rather hefty looking bosom, and their balls were the size of large grapefruits; they also seemed to be wearing a solid black collar around their neck with what looked like a silver-looking ring at the very front of the collar. The creature's penis looked to have stallion proportions, 14 inches long and half as thick, it seemed to be some sort of hybrid design between an actual canine penis and stallion penis.

“Greetings,” the figure said the creature in a friendly yet despondent female voice, turns out this creature was a she, “please don’t attack me, I’m Lord Delvarus’s secretary. In other words, I’m akin to his hired help, except I’m required to do everything commanded of me, and I don’t get an actual payment. Such is the life of a summoned creatures, I’m a high-rank support summon; but what do I get stuck doing? Looking after my summoner’s personal library and doing his forsaken paperwork. I knew a few high-rank succubi that were basically summoned to play secretary for dicks but never thought the same fate would befall me. And to make matters worse, I can’t share my name to help someone else to better summon me, doing so would be a breach of contract. Summoned creatures are bound to our contracts; they’re the one set of rules and/or laws we unable to break or breach of our own accord. I can’t purposely share that information thanks to my contract; everything has to be completely unplanned and unintentional. Oh sorry, I rambled a bit, it’s been ages since I’ve seen anyone. If you’re wondering about how you can understand me, it’s part of the magic that makes me unique, all languages, old, present, and new, are completely understandable and speakable to me; the moment you entered a location I have personal jurisdiction over all the languages you know and understand became the same way for me.”

“Wow, she really just ranted there,” said Rainbow, “but I can understand why, if I were in her position I would probably do the same if I were in the same general place with no way of leaving for ancestors know how long.” During all of this Twilight had been furiously taking notes on everything, and I mean everything, about what this creature’s features and words were.

“Think you can free her, Twilight,” asked Fluttershy.

The question snapped Twilight out of her super studious mode. “Maybe,” said the violet mare, “but spells like that are tricky, and they don’t really free the target, just establish a new contract with someone else, and can’t target the caster without enough room and the proper magic circle.”

“Do you have all the required materials for casting the spell for having the target forcefully change contracts,” inquired Rainbow.

“Not really,” said Twilight, “I have most of the materials, but the amount I have is barely enough and will basically mean I can’t cast certain high-level spells, and the materials I’m missing are exceedingly difficult to procure on their own, individually.”

As if on cue, Pinkie pulled out a large bag that spilled out all the materials Twilight required for the spell, the large pieces of jade carved to the exact specifications while remaining uncracked were a particularly impressive sight. The jade pieces were carved into perfect replicas of a mature dragon’s phallus (Spike’s in particular). Predictably, Rarity did a full-body blush to scarlet when she saw them; everyone else didn’t have such overt reactions to the half dozen dragon dildos carved from jade around them, except Fluttershy, who was also blushed furiously for a moment.

“Are the jade dragon dildos actually necessary,” inquired Fluttershy as she did an excellent job hiding visible embarrassment.

“When one or more parties in the ritual have female genitalia, yes,” said Twilight matter-of-factly. “Both of you take a jade dragon phallus and place it up your rear and vagina, for additional effect you can also put one in your mouth, but that part is optional.”

[i]Oh dear lord, [/i]Rarity thought, [i]even the magic is far too kinky for my liking. And to think, the Rainbow and me of this world find such things acceptable, if not typical.[/i]

Fluttershy took two of the dragon dildos, placing them each where Twilight had indicated into the places Twilight had instructed, as if it were perfectly normal. As did this strange dog creature. The dog creature then took two more, placing one between her breasts (for some unexplained reason) and one in her mouth.

While the two were positioning the dragon dildos in themselves, Twilight gathered the rest of the materials and placed them in a position that was modeled after what looked to be a large set of breasts, minus the nipples, and motioned for Fluttershy and the summoned dog creature to come stand as if they were the nipples after the two had finished positioning the dildos on, and in, themselves.

Rainbow was holding back giggles at watching Twilight and Fluttershy performing the clearly lewd ritual with no hint of a sense of irony; Rarity just kept doing a full-body blush the entire time that got so vibrant she went from scarlet to crimson in record time. But like a train wreck, neither mare could avert their attention from the whole event.

Once Fluttershy and the dog creature were in position, Twilight started chanting in a surprisingly erotic sounding arcane language. And kept up the chant for what felt like hours.