Natalie's Moment

After she was finished, Natalie had Casey put her clothes back on. The younger girl was still unsure, her legs were a bit unsteady as she got to her feet.

"It looks like you enjoyed that as much as I did." She said, gesturing to the space between Casey's legs, where her pussy was glinting welt. Casey flushed, one hand falling to shield herself down there. It made Natalie chuckle.

"It's probably too late for modesty, you know." She said, "For both of us, I mean. You've seen me cumming before too now, Casey. There really isn't anything to hide for either of us."

"I suppose you're right..." Casey said, her hand falling to her side. For a moment, neither of them said anything. Natalie settled on the bed, sitting with her legs curled over the edge. After a moment or two, she patted the space beside her.

"Wanna talk?"

"I...I guess..." Casey admitted, sitting beside her on the bed.

"Did you enjoy what just happened?" Natalie asked her.

"I think..." Casey paused, licked her lips, but then nodded. "I think I did, Natalie. This is... this is kind of scary for me. Like, holy shit, a few days ago, I'd never done anything remotely sexual with anyone else. And now everyone in the dorm has seen my pussy, and watched you eat me out... It's like my whole world had changed, and it'll never be the same again."

"You said that before." Natalie commented. "Do you want it to be the same again? If you could go back, would you, Casey?"

"I-" She hesitated, seeming to think for a moment before replying. "I don't know, Natalie. Part of me thinks it would be better. But part of me also thinks it would be a horrible idea. I...I've never felt like this before. Never felt this free. Scared too, and anxious, and I don't know what I'm doing half the time... coming here to be punished... but I feel different. Like a whole new person, and I am not sure why or how."

"That's easy." Natalie said, feeling a hint of familiarity. "You're exploring yourself. I did the same thing when I was younger, though it's fair to say that my resources were a bit better than yours. But it's the same idea. You go out and do things you never thought you'd do, and feel things you never thought you'd feel. And at the end, you process it, and you try to figure out just what you want to be. Who you want to be."

"When you were younger...." Casey said, her voice tentative. "Did you ever think you'd turn out like you did?"

"You mean stunningly gorgeous? I had a pretty good clue." Natalie chuckled. "No, you don't need to explain, I know what you meant. You meant did I think I'd end up as someone who liked being paraded through the dorm naked, or being made to eat you out, or tortured for hours with magic wands. Did I know right away I would enjoy all of that?"

"Y-yeah..." Casey mumbled. "That's what I meant."

"No." Natalie said. "Not at first. It took time. I had to look at myself, really look at myself, and slowly find my limits. What I am...what I enjoy... it's more common than you would think, but most people probably wouldn't like to be in this situation. Me, on the other hand... I enjoy it because it's new. Because it feels different. Don't get me wrong, I love the lack of control, the humiliation, I like to be paraded around, but I've done that before... more times than you could ever really know. What I enjoy about this time is that I don't know what's going to happen next. Wren can be cruel, but she'd not predictable, and that makes all the difference for me."

"Do you like Wren?" Casey asked. "As a girlfriend, I mean?"

"No, probably not." Natalie said. "She's cruel and cold, and she has an ego. She likes to humiliate people, and she likes to dominate and be in control always. Those aspects of her are fun in the bedroom, but I think they'd quickly become really nasty in a relationship."

"So then, you're doing this because you like what she is doing to you, but not because you like her?"

"Confusing, isn't it?" Natalie chuckled.

"A little bit." Casey admitted. "I am not sure I totally understand. But...maybe I would like to?"

"I was wondering about that." Natalie nodded. "So you do like being punished?"

Casey shifted in her seat, nodded mutely.

"M-maybe a little bit..?" She managed.

"There is no shame in it." Natalie said to her. "Except the shame you want to feel, of course."

The two talked for a little while longer before Casey went back to her own room to sleep. Natalie sat on the edge of her bed for a few more minutes to contemplate the situation she'd set in motion, When she'd first started her game, she hadn't realised just what it might do, the consequences of it. Both in Wren, who was becoming more vicious as she fed her darker nature, and in Casey, who was experiencing a sexual awakening she had never even considered before this. It made her think, it really did. All of her life, Natalie had relied on her ability, allowing her to do essentially anything she wanted with no unexpected consequences. It was so easy to start thinking of everyone else as merely tools for her to use, toys to play with and then discard, with no thought afterwards as to what they had thought or felt.

As Natalie looked at herself in the mirror hanging over the far wall, and saw her own face reflected, she wondered as she had before just what sort of person she really was. All of her life had been dedicated to the pursuit of her own pleasure, she knew that she was ultimately a selfish person. But when she spoke to Casey, when she saw how nervous the younger girl was, and yet how willing also to embrace this side, it made her think of a younger Natalie. Someone who had not yet gotten to the point where her fantasies had taken precedence over others. Someone who had not yet started to treat her friends, her school, and her classmates as unwitting actors in her own personal porn.

Was she a bad person...? She didn't like to think so. She never hurt anyone, never did anything she couldn't restore. Yes, she used people, but they enjoyed it too, and at the end, they didn't remember anything. There was no harm done, never any harm done. Natalie Lawmaker knew she was not a bad person. She really wasn't.

But it was only really starting to dawn on her now, as she looked into Casey's eyes, and heard the stirring cries of an old Natalie that she'd long since buried, that while she might not have been a bad person, that did not automatically make her a good one.

She went to sleep that night with such mixed thoughts battling in her head. It as the start of a chain of considerations that she would not be able to shake for quite a long time.