Matt bought it

"Then who did pay for it?" you demand.

Although you and your wife both work, your job does make more money. She's only an assistant at an accounting firm, and on more than one occasion she has complained to you that she's little better than a glorified secretary. It doesn't even make use of her history degree but after college, when you were both trying to save for a wedding, she took whatever was going. So you know that although she might earn a decent wage, she doesn't have the expendable cash to be splurging on a dress for Chez Mignon.

"Matt bought it for me."

The words drip icily from her lips as if she's doing you a favor just by answering your question. But the words have an effect that she didn't even predict, making your blood run cold as you realize your best friend and your wife have been talking behind your back. Your wife doesn't know that you've set her up to go on a sex date with Matt and your best friend is oblivious to the fact that you haven't told Ariana the real reason for the dinner.

You scrutinize her face, trying to discern whether she knows about your treachery and trickery yet, but her face is such a mask of cool anger that you can't tell what exactly is fueling her fury. You decide to ask a few questions and find out what exactly they talked about, but the situation is so precarious that speaking feels more like walking out on to a frozen lake.

"So you met with Matt?"

"Of course, I met with Matt," she scoffs as she crosses the living room. "How else would he have paid for it if he didn't come with me? Do you think he just shoved a bunch of money into my hand and sent me on my way."

Again her frustration is so great that there's no tell for what she's actually angry at, although you're almost certain that if Matt had revealed what was going to happen on Friday that your wife would have beheaded you the moment she'd stepped inside the house. She wouldn't be arguing about who paid for a dress if she found out you'd set her up for a sex date without telling her.

But now you have something else to be bothered by as images of your wife modelling dresses for Matt come into your mind. You wonder how many dresses she tried on for him, and you wonder what the changing rooms looked like. Were they the ones with curtains that if aren't pulled tight, Matt could see your wife slipping in and out of her clothes? You imagine all the opportunities he would have had to peek on your wife in her underwear.

"You took him shopping with you?" you growl. "What the fuck Ari?"

"You said I couldn't get a new dress because we couldn't afford it," Ari snapped back. "Matt paid for it so you don't have to, so what's the problem?"

You understand the logic, and it was a fair solution to the problem, but you aren't mad because she came up with a solution, you're mad because it was disrespectful. And she knew you'd be upset or else she would have told you she was going to do it.

"It's the principle of the thing," you insist. "I told you that we couldn't afford to get a new dress and you ran out and asked Matt for it. What's the point in us even having a conversation if you're just going to go look for a loophole?"

"Because it wasn't a conversation. I had no say in the matter. You decided there wasn't enough money and told me I was a child for asking. I don't think I have any duty to respect you as a husband if you don't respect me as a wife," she says as she nears the bottom of the stairs. "And I didn't ask Matt. I was talking to him about which dress I already owned would be good for Chez Mignon and he offered to buy me new clothes."

She stalks up the stairs, dress in hand, leaving you to your anger. It's not like your wife to act out like this so you know what you said to her last night must have really upset her, but you also can't help but feel completely disrespected and humiliated. The only thing you can think to do though is confront Matt.

You ring your best friend. It takes some time, but he picks up eventually. He sounds slightly out of breath.

"Hey man. Sorry, I was slightly predisposed. What's the emergency?"

You think you've caught him at the gym until you hear a giggle in the background and realize he was with Kali. It only makes your blood boil further to think he's having such a good time while you're arguing with your wife.

"What's the idea with buying Ari a dress? I told her we couldn't afford one."

"Yeah, I assumed you were saving your money for Kali." he said casually. "So what's the problem with me spending my money on Ari?"

He's got you there. In fact it catches you so off guard you can only stammer for a moment while you think up a good enough excuse for your frustration.

"Well, it's a bit much. Maybe we should have a budget?"

"Yeah, I didn't think about that. Well, maybe next time." he chuckles. "What's done is done, right? Is that all? I really gotta get back to what I was doing..."

You respond in the affirmative and he hangs up. You sit down on the couch and wonder what the hell you're supposed to do now.