Lindsey Shepard: The Path To Justice, by Unkown7

Hello, Ora the administrator here.

Before this segment starts proper, I'd like to inform the readers that, due to the nature of this story, this review will contain copious amount of spoilers for “Hard Candy” Readers discretion is advised.

Till then.

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“Hmph, what a pretentious title.”

“Aww, my little dumpling. I'm sure it will be fun.”

“Yes, I am delighted to see what nonsensical drivel Unkown7 has conjured up this time.”

“Hmm..the fact that I am here. Little Ocelot has rejected you?”

“Yeah, she still can't handle the name.”

“You could have her.”

“What monster do you take me for, Marel?”

“Only the best kind.”

“I suppose we need to explain the premise first. This story is part of the Cursed Punishment non cinematic universe and as the name suggest focuses on Lindsey. Since we are both from Cursed Punishment, this is rather weird. How does this all work out? What exactly are we? Do we even exist? Should we be worried about any psychological damage resulting from the existential dread we will experience from this knowledge?”

“It's best to not think too hard about this. Let's just roll with it.”

“For once I have to agree.”

“Shall we begin then? With reading Lindsey Shepard: The Path To Justice, by little bunny

“Indeed.”

READING IN PROGRESS (BGM)

“Yeah, I don't think Gina would have been able to handle this.”

“Hmhm, it's a very violent story, and that is saying something.”

“Basically it's the story of Lindsey and her fight against evil. Or at least what she sees as evil.”

“My little Dumpling, let me explain this or our watchers. So there is this girl called little Ocelot, who is very naughty and get cursed with a curse of absolute obedience. Oh, the premise is just amazing! I love it!”

“Unfortunately, instead of someone compelling, like myself, the character who takes charge of Gina is actual psychopath Lindsey Shepard.”

“Lindsey is too far gone. I like a project, but Lindsey is even beyond my talent.”

“But really, this story isn't about Gina. It's about Lindsey and Susan and their crusade to take over the school.”

“I do like Riceball,”

“Then please tell me what the hell people see in her. Even Lindsey used to call her a gnat.”

“I think that cowardly personality of hers does have it's charms. For the record, she is doing well since she started living with me, especially after I had the human sewage that was her family murdered.”

“Very funny, Marel. Moving on. Lindsey is torturing Gina, the usual Unkown7 brand of spanking and eating feces. Look I want to be very clear here because SOME people seem to have the wrong idea. I am not into fecal matter.”

“Are you sure? I won't judge you, you know.”

“No! Sure, I made Gina do some disgusting things, but that was just to humiliate her. Susan is the one who is into that shit. Pun intended.”

“Alright, alright. Where where we? Lindsey is quickly raising trough Royal Magnificence ranks...”

“Really Marel?”

“Oh shush it. Don't tell this little Ocelot, but you have to admit it's a bit of a silly name.”

“You know. I never asked, but why Crazy Carousel?”

“Hhmhm, that is my little secret, I think.”

“You just made it up on the spot, didn't you?”

“Oh, Phooey!”

“Anyway..continuing with this delightful tale, I make my first appearance and suggest that Susan gets handed over to Gina as a punishment for stepping out of line.”

“That seems a bit of a weird leap of logic...”

“Because it is! Unkown7 always does this and it drives me up the wall. You can't just copy paste sentences without context! Why would I expose myself like that? This moron version of myself disgusts me!”

“Is this the part where I can tell you to calm down?”

“Haa...If only Unkown7's grammar was bad enough for me to faint. Unfortunately, it isn't.”

“Can we move on to the part where I kidnap everyone? I love that part!”

“Yeah. Marel makes a powergrab and abducts Lindsey, Susan and Moron-Me. But not Gina.”

“I take offense with that. This awful version of myself implies that I would turn little Ocelot away because of her small boobs. What horrible slander! I love her cute little lovebuds!”

“That is the one thing you take issue with?”

“I mean it is a fairly accurate portrayal otherwise. I would totally make you run laps naked in order to lose weight. ♥ “

„Good to know.“

„Meanwhile in Royal Magnificence baby Shark takes over and is quite vicious.”

“Uh...Baby Shark is Carmen? She doesn't really play a role in “Hard Candy” but she was fairly high up in Royal Magnificent. Also a murderer. She shoots one of her cronies in the head, for arguing with her.”

“Yes, quite vicious.”

“Why is everyone taking Carmen's side in the first place? In fact, why are all members of Royal Magnificent idiotic drones that follows whoever claims to be the leader at that moment? That's not how power works. That's not how anything works! Argh! This drivel is driving me to drink!”

“But little Ocelot has a bigger problem then baby shark. You see, she requires a breathing permission from Lindsey and so she hatches a plan to free Lindsey and Riceball.”

“This section really upsets me...I mean more then the rest of this dump. It's particularly vile.”

“You want to talk about it?”

“You bet I want! Alright, so Gina succeeds in freeing the two, right? You would think they show some gratitude? Wrong! Lindsey argues that Gina only did this because she needed to get breathing permission from her.”

“She is not wrong, tough.”

“Yes, but that doesn't change the fact that Gina rescued them. True justice would be to acknowledge that. Maybe use it as a springboard to rehabilitate Gina? But no, nothing of the sort. Lindsey doesn't want justice. This is just for the sake of and nothing Gina does will ever change that. It's disgusting.”

“You really care a lot about her, hm?”

“Gina has a lot of potential and I hate seeing potential squandered. That's all.”

“But here is the thing, I don't think Lindsey is interested in redemption.”

“And you know what? I give her that. Lindsey is not required to forgive Gina. But what is the purpose of this story then? Just porn?”

“I do think, that is the intent, yes. After all little bunny made all of us even more evil for excactly that purpose.”

“I mean, jesus christ. Lindsey murders people and dreams of chopping of Rina's hand. Her excuse for that is that they are evil and deserve it. If I didn't knew any better I would think Unkown7 sets Lindsey up as the villain. She literally kills a girl for liking the wrong Star Wars movie! Actually ok, I can kinda understand that."

“Hmhm.”

“Let's just move on with it. Lindsey enslaves Rina and the Wildcats and then goes on a weird tangent recruiting all kinds of useless clubs to her menagerie.”

“I believe this is called filler. Although I find the lack of a beach or hot spring arc disturbing.”

“After way too much of this useless nonsense we reach the part where it turns out my scar was self inflicted.”

“Are you ok, with talking about it?”

“Yeah, I can handle it. From a purely narrative standpoint it's actually not that bad of an angle. After all Gina doesn't remember it herself and in Susan and my case, it could be a faulty memory. There is potential here. Unfortunately Unkown7 can't handle nuance so he treats it like a joke.”

“She.”

“Excuse me, what?”

“You didn't notice little bunny is a girl?”

“Bullshit.”

“But it says so right on her profile.”

“Oh, come on Marel, this is clearly just a guy pretending to be a girl!”

“Hhmhm, is that what you think?”7

“But...that doesn't make any sense! Why is there so much misogyny in here if Unkown7 was a girl all along?”

“Oh, I know girls like that. I find them very adorable, actually. Especially when you screw with their heads a little...”

“A-Anyways, we got a bit sidetracked here. Back to my point. Where was I? Ah, yes, nuance! There is none of it here!”

“Hmm, my little Dumpling I have to ask. Did you like anything in this story?”

“Some of the humor was ok. I like how Moron-Me decided to help Gina because she didn't life in luxury. Completely missing the point of the original scene, of course, but it was still funny. Basically this story could work as a parody with how over exaggerated everyone is.”

“That sounds fun.”

“But, there is always this spitefulness to it, that makes it just not an enjoyable read. The story is obsessed with deconstructing “Hard Candy” but by doing so it will never achieve it's own identity.”

“Hmm, I just think little bunny needs to do more work in the sexy department.”

“That would be a start. All the “erotic” scenes in this are very hands off. I have the sneaking suspicion that Unkown7 is actually too embarrassed to write anything more detailed.”

“Aww, that is kinda adorable tough. If I ever get my hands on her I make sure little bunny writes a very detailed account of what I do to her.”

“Good to know, again.”

“Was that a bit...rambly? But is this the part where we are almost done?”

“Yes, this is about as much as I can stomach. It is a shame we didn't get to the point where Lindsey had actual control of the school tough. I am dying to know what laughable notion about rulership we would be privy this time. Let me guess: Everyone is magically doing what Lindsey wants because she is the good guy. Give me that sake. I need another drink.”

“My little dumpling, you really need to stop getting so worked up over this. But then again, I don't particularly mind you getting drunk.”

“Whatever. This has gone on for long enough. Until next time.”

“Bye bye.”