Jesus, of course

Ah Jesus H. Christ, the most controversial and discussed zombie story there ever was.

“Alright everybody, today is we are going to be doing some role-playing. Nate seeing how you are the only boy here would you be Jesus for us?” Mrs. Sarah was her usual self, calm and confident.

“I don’t know,” said Nate. He liked being hesitant. “Can’t someone else do it?”

“What? No way. Come on bud you can do it. I am sure we would all love to see your amazing acting ability.” Mrs. Fitz was her usual spunky self, always encouraging.

“Just do it so we can move on with the lesson.” said Grace. She was a stern, no-nonsense type of person.

“Alright, I guess so.” said Nate.

“That’s the spirit!” said Mrs. Fitz. “Come stand up here for us.” He did as he was told and took his place in the center of the circle, accompanied by a weak applause from the girls. This was his time to strike. He peered into the group leaders’ minds and saw that he was going to be made to recite some quotes out of the Bible while everyone else did absolutely nothing except watch and he would sit back down and then the adults would talk for a long time, explaining what he had just read. Nate thought he could make it a bit more interactive than that. He wiped the three older women’s minds of the lesson and filled in the gaps with a lesson of his own. The three women remained dazed for a few seconds but snapped out of it before anybody noticed.

“So,” Mrs. Fitz started again. “Does everyone remember how Jesus was betrayed by Judas?” She was answered by a few mumbled yeses. “And does anyone know what happened next?”

“He was captured, tortured, publicly humiliated, and ultimately crucified.” Mary answered, the biblical know-it-all that she was.

“Exactly,” said Mrs. Fitz. “Today we are going to try and recreate that to give an idea of what that was like.” The girls started to pay more attention when they heard this as they wanted to know where this was going. “So with that being said,” turning to Nate, “Nate, would you please take off your clothes.”

The whole room was in shock except for Nate, Mrs. Fitgerald, Mrs. Sarah, and Grace.

“What?” Said Madison.

“You heard her take off your clothes!” said Grace, sternly.

Nate started to unbutton his shirt in full view of everyone while they all stared in surprise. They didn’t know what was harder to believe, the fact that the request was made or the fact that it was followed through so easily. Nate kicked off his shoes and unbuckled his belt. When he pulled his pants down they all saw that he had (purposely) forgotten something on his way to church today.

“Looks like someone forgot to wear underwear today.” Mrs. Sarah said with a sly smile. Nate continued removing his clothes, ending with his socks and dropping everything in a pile on the floor next to him. Mrs. Fitz picked up his clothes and walked them over to the open window. She threw the clothes out the window, where they were blown about by the breeze and scattered on the grass below. She closed the window for good measure.

“And with that,” she said. “ we can now begin our lesson.”