Jaqueline and The Mistress read back

"Which pirate story do you suppose they're referring to, Jaqueline?"

"Haven't the foggiest. Are these the women you wanted me to send to Valhalla for some of that beady essum fun?"

"It's BDSM."

"What did I say?"

"Yes, these are the ones. I hope you'll see why once we finish reading their review."

"Hee hee hee. Well breezing through the first bit I can't help but giggle. They start off a little silly by assuming the other two branches won't have lesbianing in them. One has two gal pals getting closer after some steamy time in a nude sauna. And in the other Miss Love pretty much only interacts with me."

"Deliciously naive of them isn't it. As is the assumption that Gina could bully Claire."

"Hee hee, totally. That'd be such fun, but I'll have to take a rain check on that scene. I think icicle nipples are more in store for her."

"Pray tell me more."

"Well that nerd, the one banging on about Chekhov's Gun, said the details of May's beach party were useless, but it says a lot about May's character that she absolutely knocked on everyone's door so she'd have enough guests for the party."

"I don't know if that counts."

"And another thing. It's not just a beach themed party 'for some reason.' It sets up that May totally doesn't like winter. Something for Claire to fix. You can't just blow past that."

"Still probably not enough."

"And another thing! The lack of guests shows that the building is mostly empty, so Claire and May might be able to play some games outside of their apartments with only a slight risk of getting caught."

"That hasn't come up yet."

"And another thing! Hugo is a fun character. I'm sorry to rain on your parade, Chekhov dork, but sometimes you need to look out your car window and enjoy the snow covered landscape instead of just zipping onto your next destination."

"I thought you liked raining on parades."

"Mm-hmm, gets those costumes all nice and tight, and sometimes transparent too."

"Indeed, but back to the review Marcie seemed to take issue with Claire being able to recall the characters in a movie she just watched. However, remembering details is important for any dom. It's the little devils that make your prey squirm."

"Eh, details are good I guess, but just like the other cool wind spirits, I don't sweat 'em."

"And neither do these women apparently. They only managed to find one spelling mistake. Incompetence deserving a flogging if ever I saw."

"Awwu, but It's so cute how she shows off her German, like a puppy wanting to perform as many tricks as she can. But why does the other one get upset at her for nitpicking? Didn't you say that was the whole point of the reviews? Do you think she's confused?"

"She just doesn't have a good mistress."

"How do you figure? Re-gale me with your knowledge."

"She doesn't know a thing about building anticipation, or teasing. First you immobilize your victim."

"You mean consenting partner."

"As you like, first you immobilize your consenting victim. Then you grab the feather. Not to tickle them, merely use it as a prop, while you talk about how you'd like to tickle them, what techniques you'd use. And once your toy is sweating with excitement, put the feather away. Next you bring out a candle. Is it to drip hot wax? Or just to set the atmosphere? You won't tell; you're too busy asking about the kinky dream they had."

"Oooo exciting, but I'm into this tale's pace for a different reason."

"Are you going to keep me in suspense?"

"This part of their adventure is all about Claire's development from a woman who thinks she's straight and would never dominate someone to a total kink fiend. It makes me just want to giggle all over when I think about the first time she ties someone up, or when she accidentally spanks May. And May getting all hot and bothered with no way to release her tension is absolutely yummy. If they want something quick they can check out Miss Love. She's got a bath that turns into her masturbating out a home invasion fantasy in the first chapter."

"And here we are at the end of their review. What are your thoughts on the final comments?"

"Hail to the queens of all dummies. This collection of tales is called Cozy and Kinky. Not Playing Outside in the Snow and Kinky. My blizzard is just an excuse for everyone to be trapped inside."

"But you did such an enticing job relaying the sensual nature of cold weather."

"Yeah, and then I used all those sensuals on that Love-ly lass. But apparently me playing games with a mortal woman isn't lesbian enough for them. Ooh, that makes me flurry-ous. I oughta storm over there and blow their... and winter them... icicle... con-dense-sensation... rain on their parade? No, I did that one. Whew, brainstorming puns is hard."

"You could simply send them to Valhalla."

"That still seems a little ****. That reindeer idea was actually pretty good. I may have to sneak that into Claire's mind. Just don't tell them that. The egghead's ego is big enough as is."

"At least consider it. I'm off to prepare an eating contest involving a certain rapscallion."

"Sounds saucy, I can't stay chill while I think about how you're going to precipitate her arousal. Ha, got it in the end!"