Flush Out the Poop Silos

"You got the lucky end of the bargain, Greeny. You're eating this place's pussy while I'm left scrounging on the ass."

"I thought eating ass was supposed to be fun?"

"Not if it's a blood fiend's ass." Cindy shivered. "Don't ever let anyone lie to you and say blood tastes just as good as cum."

Choosing to take her word for it and not ask any more questions, L'Abbee turned to face the privies. "Where's the water, then?"

Cindy waddled over to the wall opposite the waste deposits and pointed to a cord hanging from the ceiling. "You just gotta rinse out the goop in the tubes by pullin' that. Just a li'l clink and all the stinky bits are somebody else's problem."

L'Abbee took a quizzical look at the innocent-looking cord. "What does it release? Some potion that magically dissolves the shit and piss?"

"Nah, just that 'water' stuff you've got up here. 'Go-Away-Juice' is way too expensive to bring all the way up to the mortal plane."

"Oh, like spider silk from the Underdark, then." The dark elf couldn't count the number of times he'd wanted to smuggle some of the stuff with him to sell on the surface. But the one time he'd tried it, he'd gotten caught coming back and ended up doing a few hundred lap dances for a Spiderling and her many, many offspring. Worst spring break ever.

He pulled the cord, and a surge of water rocked the ground beneath the wooden floor. He and Cindy could hear the roar echoing from the privies as it tumbled all the way down the cavernous tunnels of waste. As it dissipated, L'Abbee reluctantly asked. "So, where does that water go, exactly?"

The freshly despoiled lesser noblewoman, after fleeing the town square to preserve her modesty and reputation, was grimacing at her new choice in wardrobe. She had done her best to make herself decent with the garbage that littered the alley she had chosen as her hiding place, but to little success.

Gone were her precious, expensive frocks, studded footwear, gaudy bonnet, and nautical-themed undergarments. In their place was now a used rice sack with some holes cut for her legs and a broken plank of wood she was holding over her breasts. Aside from her auburn hair, undone from its tight bun and hanging loosely over her chest and back, nothing else covered the wealthiest woman in Pilla from her head to her now filthy bare feet. And she still had a long way to go to get back to her house without being seen by the townspeople, least of all those treacherous women in that C.U.T.E cult. Oh, she'd just die of embarrassment if any of them caught wind of this.

Well, at least this situation can't get any worse. The words hadn't even reached her lips before a low rumbling started up from behind her. The unlucky noblewoman slowly turned to face the wall she was leaning against, her heart sinking as she stared at a large iron grate. The rumbling started to shake the ground around her and a few drops of water started to leak out into the alley. "Oh, no." She whispered as a roaring wave of foul-smelling water exploded out of the wall and carried her away. Her ramshackle clothes were immediately swept away, and the freshly nude, un-freshly smelling lady let out a shrill scream as the wave carried her out of the alley, over a cobblestone wall behind the row of buildings, and over a small cliff.

On the bright side, at least she'd have a soft landing in the pumpkin patch below. And nobody from town would find her down there. Except the young farmhand she was about to collide with...

Cindy shrugged. "I'unno. Not my job to think about it." She pushed open the bathroom door and started hobbling into the hallway. "Come on Tall, Dark, and Twinky, we gotta clean the other rooms."

"My name's L'Abbee, you know."

"And you're sticking with that? Not very fuckable, if you ask me."

L'Abbee rolled his eyes. "Whatever, Cindy."

The imp stopped and looked at him emphatically. "It's Cindy."

"That's what I said."

"No, you said 'Cindy.' My name's 'Sindy,' with an S ya dingus." She scoffed as she waddled away. "Mortals, I swear."

L'Abbee let out his own sigh, counting his lucky stars that she was only annoying. It could always be worse.