DVD

“It’s a DVD, it doesn’t really do much on its own. We need a tv and a DVD player for me to show you,” you answer the gnomish inquisitors. The gnomes look confused. You quickly explain what a tv is.

“Oh, I’ve seen one of those!” one of the gnomes exclaims before running into a bush. He comes back out carrying a tv in his arms.

“Yea that’s a tv but it needs electricity, and the tower appearing seems to have knocked out the power,” you say gesturing to the looming tower.

“Oh, we’ve got electricity,” the gnomes respond before dragging a strange floating crystal into view. They look the tv over and you guide them to the cord. They rip the head off and expose the wires. The take a couple wires from a coil around the green crystal attaching them to the tv. The crystal glows and the tv turns on.

“We still need a DVD player,” you explain. Then you go on describing a DVD player. They bring you to a pile of electronic boxes. You look over the pile of cable boxes, sound systems, and DVD players. You grab a DVD player and the necessary cords before going back to the tv with the gnomes. Then gnomes power the DVD player while you connect the HDMI cable.

The gnomes are amazed when the DVD player opens and you place the pornographic DVD into its waiting mouth. The movie starts playing and the gnomes watch the sexual scenes taking place on the screen. You switch the DVDs showing them an assortment of movies. They seemed to have collected a large amount of porn but you find a couple normal movies in the mix. “Amazing,” the boss says looking over the screen, “tell the scouts to grab any DVDs they find.”

“Next item is this,” a new gnome drags a bicycle in through the gate. “It has wheels so we think it’s a vehicle of some kind but it doesn’t even stand up on its own.”