Chatting With Belle

“The gargoyles are so much more fun!” Belle exclaims emphatically. “Come on, please tell me I’m not the only one here who thinks that?”

“Not at all, the gargoyles are awesome.” I agree.

“I’m just happy to be fighting something else. I don’t really care what it is, as long as it isn’t those dumb knights.” Mia says.

“A-fucking-men to that.” Belle says, taking a bite of her food.

I chuckle, enjoying that Belle’s starting to open up a little more in conversation. She’s become less guarded over the past couple of days, although she still seems to enjoy finding things to be annoyed at.

Olivia watches the exchange, her eyes twinkling with a kind of warmth that I’m not sure I’ve seen from her before. It’s a look that makes me happy, because she’s clearly happy. Gaia knows the woman deserves it.

We’re sitting around the table, breaking for lunch during a day of fighting against the Bell Gargoyle segment of the raid. It’s certainly a welcome change of pace from fighting the same old knights for the past few days.

And that damned Channeler. Good riddance.

As we eat in a comfortable silence for a few minutes, Lena decides to bring up the question that’s been on my mind for a while.

“So, Belle? Why’d you actually join the guild?” She asks. “I don’t wanna be mean, but you didn’t really seem interested in being around any of us. What changed?”

I can feel everyone at the table perking up at that. We all listen just a little bit closer to the conversation.

Belle in response, shrugs. “I guess I decided I don’t hate you all, and that sticking around might not be terrible.” She says, taking a bite of her food.

Lena presses on, her disappointed groan making it very clear she’s not satisfied with that answer. “Yeah but like, what made you decide that? What happened?” She asks further.

Belle shrugs again, chewing another bite of her food, seeming almost amused at Lena’s continued questioning.

She swallows the food in her mouth, then answers. “I dunno. You’re not completely unbearable.” Belle says. I can almost see the grin on the redhead’s lips, but Belle keeps a straight face the whole time.

“Hear that babe? You’re not completely unbearable! Only mostly.” Emma teases her girlfriend.

“Hey!” Lena complains.

“Whatever the reason is, it’s really nice that you joined us. We all really appreciate how hard you’re training with us, and how much you’re helping us.” Ivy says, her simple earnest nature making me smile.

Belle nearly chokes on her food as she hears Ivy’s words, drinking some water to help as she swallows. “Thank you.” She says awkwardly.

“I convinced her to stay.” Olivia says simply, smiling at Belle from across the table.

Belle smiles back at her warmly, saying nothing, and taking another bite of her food.

“Sooo are y’all banging now, or what?” Lena asks.

In perfect sync, both Olivia and Belle fix Lena with a glare that could wither sunflowers.

Mia cackles at the exchange, and Lena triumphantly whispers over to her, with a comically exaggerated non attempt at hiding her words. “That’s a yes!”

Olivia sighs and Belle shakes her head, going back to eating.

After a few minutes of silence, with none of us knowing exactly how to break it, Olivia speaks to Belle. “Perhaps if you are sticking around for the foreseeable future, you should tell them a little about yourself?” She prompts.

Belle sighs in response. “Alright, I guess that’s fair. Fine. What do you all want to know?” She asks, throwing the question to the rest of the table.

“Are you and Olivia sleeping together?” Lena asks again immediately, and Emma elbows her in the ribs. “Ow!” The prankster complains.

“I will not dignify that with a response.” Belle says. “Does anybody have a question that isn’t about my sex life?” She asks, with a slightly exasperated sound.

“Do you have family?” Mia asks.

Belle grimaces at the question. “That’s a little personal. Though, I suppose that is what I signed up for.” She replies.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.” Olivia says, a sympathetic look on her face.

Belle waves her off. “No, I should tell them.”

Gathering herself, she speaks again. “Alright, gather round, settle down and listen up.” She says in a light hearted, almost mocking tone.

I lean in slightly towards her, as do the rest of us.

“It was a dark and stormy night, 14 years ago. I lived with my parents, as an only child, in a simple home. The weather betrayed the tragic events that would take place that night.” Belle said dramatically.

“Okay I can’t be stuffed with theatrics anymore.” The redhead says, clearing her throat. “I had parents, but they died when I was a teenager.” She says, matter of factly, leaving the rest of the table in a somewhat awkward silence.

Skylar nods sympathetically. She knows what it’s like to lose a family member at a young age.

“I’m so sorry.” Ivy says.

“How did they die?” Elsa asks in a small voice.

Belle sighs heavily, her mood dropping fast. “They were killed by a gang. The gang that killed them was trying to kidnap me. My parents were just trying to protect me. They knew how much I was going to be targeted for slavery.” She said.

“Wait what? Why’d they target you more?” Lena asks.

Belle sighs again. “Because I’m powerful…and because I’m trans.” She says.

“Holy shit, I’d never have known!” Lena says, leading to another elbow in the ribs from Emma.

The others are similarly surprised. The only reason I already knew is because her character sheet mentioned it.

“Well I don’t exactly go around broadcasting it.” Belle says.

I can feel the others wanting to bring it up, but nobody wants to be the one to do it, because none of them want to out me without my permission. Through our mental connection, I give Ivy permission to say it.

“Gemma’s trans too!” My girlfriend says happily.

“Oh really?” Belle asks, looking at me with a newfound respect and kinship.

I nod, somewhat sheepishly.

“Then you understand.” She says grimly.

I nod again, grimacing. “I do.”

“Wait what? What am I missing?” Mia asks the question on everybody’s minds.

Belle gives me a small nod, giving me permission to explain the connection between her being trans and her being targeted more often by gangs.

I turn to the rest of the table. “Trans people are disproportionately affected by violence of all kinds, both because of bigotry, and because of fetishisation, which feed into each other.” I say.

“I’m guessing you started transitioning when you were young?” I ask Belle, and she nods in response.

“A young trans girl would be targeted for all the worst reasons you can think of, and doubly so because it would be super rare to find a young trans girl who’s an abyssal.” I sum up, not even wanting to say it explicitly because the notion is so repulsive.

It takes a few seconds for the penny to drop, but when it does, there comes a mixture of disgusted and outraged noises from around the table as everyone realises.

I turn to Belle, having heard similar stories in the mundane world, but not to this extent before. “I’m so sorry.” I say.

She waves it off. “It was hard, but I was lucky. My power meant they couldn’t touch me.”

“What happened to the people who killed your parents?” Skylar asks.

“They didn’t live for long after that.” Belle says, not elaborating any further. “Anyway, I’m here now, that’s what matters.” She closes the matter, clearly a little uncomfortable sharing.

Elsa jumps in with another question to change the subject. “Do you have any hobbies?” She asks quietly.

Belle gives her a look, grateful for the change in topic. “Woodcarving.” She answers. “I picked it up years ago as a way to relax. There’s something oddly hypnotising in the process of creating something with your own two hands.”

Elsa smiles at her, sharing the joy of creation. “Maybe you can show me sometime?” She asks shyly.

“Maybe sometime.” Belle agrees.